FknBucky

How have we lost our way so badly??  It is fucking comical at this point.  I write a blog called “Women make babies, not good employees” and just about everyone realizes how stupid that sounds.  I was being completely serious, but nobody takes me that way.  I mean come on.  Equal pay for women??  Next thing you will start asking and listening to their opinions.  Oh the humanity. 

Yesterday while watching some TV I noticed a big story was that Mitt Romney said “Binders Full of Women”.  Holy shit that backwoods mother fucker is trying to repress women into stone age times.  I bet he wants to chain them up and make them into little baby factories.   This way they will never be able to abort their little Saturday night drunken whore mistake.  Don’t blame this guy I’ve never made a baby I was planning to take care of.  I mean I have great intentions if any of those little bastards ever find me.  Kids…..  They are so easy to stay 3 steps ahead of.   I like to prove points by saying things more stupid than  the original comment.   You starting to see a trend here???

I happen to also read an article that had to do with a 20 year old woman in Afghanistan who was beheaded because she would not sleep with men for money.  Most American girls call that a dinner date, but in that part of the world there is no dinner and not much of a thank you afterwards.   Here is what happened.  A woman’s Mother-in-Law wanted her to play prostitute while her husband was at work.  She refused so “Mommy” cut her fucking head off.  Still think your in-laws are assholes??

So while shit like this is going on, the women’s groups of America are on TV complaining that Mitt Romney is treating them like second class citizens.  Really??  This is so stupid it makes me want to punch myself in the nuts.  There are real problems going on and your “boy” falling in the polls isn’t one of them.  Here is a shocker.  Regardless of who wins the election America will still be the greatest country on the Earth.  We have to remember to find common ground instead of picking apart everything MSNBC & FOX news tells us too.  Wake up people, we are falling deeper and deeper into the division hole that we will never come out of.  

Look this country is supposed to be free.  If the women (everyone for that matter) in this country could see past their own petty bullshit differences here, they could advance the cause for women across the globe overnight.  I’m not a woman and if you want to know how I treat them ask one of my sisters.   There are lots of things to be passionate about, but the term “binders full of women” isn’t one of them.  Don’t waste my time or anyone else’s making up some reason to be pissed of.  We don’t want to hear it, and personally it makes me want to impregnate you and take your fucking shoes.  Barefoot and pregnant for some of you slower thinkers.

You don’t like your paycheck start your own fucking business and pay all women workers whatever you want.  This is Amercia and you are free to do that.  I mean you can whatever you want, except hire white males.  Shit if women get a law; what about minorities??  People in wheelchairs??  What about stupid people??  Is it fair they don’t get paid as much as someone smarter???  The world is not perfect.  Shit happens and yes sometimes you get to hold the shitty end of the stick.  No amount of laws, regulations, or “fair share” bullshit is going to change that. 

So don’t bring your stupid ass on my TV talking about being treated as a second class citizen because some dumb ass running for president said “Binders full of women”.  Want to know what a second class citizen is??  Read the book Carmen Bin Laden.  The book Slave.  Hell read anything about other people in this world that deal with real shit.  

So before you beat the shit out of me for whatever it is that seems to be bunching your panties up today take a look in the mirror and ask yourself “Is this going to make me look like a fucking idiot??”  

Fknbucky

You know there are a lot of things going on right now and almost everyone has an opinion about them.  I certainly have lots of opinions and I’d gladly tell you all about them if you have the time.  Most of you know my feelings about Obama and the election so I won’t bore you with those facts today.  Instead I do have something a little closer to home that I would like to enlighten you with.

This war on women; which I find to be spot on.  First of all women are not as awesome as men because men can write their name in snow using pee.  This is a fact.  If you have a problem with it please take it up with God, big bang theory, or whatever “master being” you credit for creating mankind.  Being able to write out Fknbucky with a slight flick of the wrist propels me straight to the top of the food chain suckers.

Something equally as stupid is the arguement about women not receiving equal pay.  Anyone that takes this for face value is a fucking moron and I’m going to spend the next 400 words explaining why in a very simplistic way.  If you fall into this category just know in less than 5 minutes you will have found yourself to be an idiot, but there is hope!!  So burn your bra and let your pit hairs grow one last time before you see the light of why YOU are still the problem.

First of all lets point out the obvious.  There are way more men in the work force than women.  Why is that Bucky??  Are women to stupid to work???  That answer is “of course”.  We like to keep them locked up in sheds to protect the men driving to work in the morning.  More women drivers on the roads means less survivors. I can already hear the bull dykes beating on their saggy boob chests now.  “Shut the fuck up” is my only response.  The real answer is that many more women stay home to raise children (by their own choice) then men so it becomes obvious from this point “more men” in work force.  Having more means a better chance of  “men” earning higher than average wages.  I know;  it is so complicated…..

Moving on which hopefully you can already see this is going to hurt your pea size brain so let the bullshit you’ve been spoon fed the last 6 months melt away to make room for some logic.  It is illegal to pay someone more money just because they are white correct??  I personally think this law sucks because I am white.  If I could bring home an extra 10K per year just because I burn easily in the sun, I would be singing “fuck yeah” all the way to the bank.  Using this tidbit of knowledge we know it is illegal to pay someone more on appearance therefore it is illegal to pay some broad more just because she has a nice rack.

Here is the point.  If you aren’t worth more you don’t get paid more.  This is 2012 if you haven’t been paying attention.  Employers aren’t worried about the “good ole boy’s” club anymore.  They worry about making profits which by the way is why people start businesses.  I know you believe they start a business to give your dumbass a paycheck, but that is not the case Corky.  So if a woman does a great job making the company money she will be rewarded with better pay.  Pretty fucking simple.  This logic doesn’t work out with the whole argument claiming 1/2 the population (people on the right) hate women so why not just ignore these basic facts.  BOOM.  Women are getting the shaft they say. Ha ha, so true.

Okay so we already established the fact that women are more likely to stay home with children than men.  Here is another fact that will blow your mind.  Women are actually the ones to push a baby out.  Oh yeah its true.  You see a woman carries the baby for about 9 months, goes through a process called labor (because its hard), and “poof” you have a new welfare recipient.  Ha ha.  Just kidding.   Kind of….

So they then have maternity leave which is time away from work that you can’t get back.  During this time a co-worker (male or female) continues to work everyday, learn more skills, travel to close deals, and just about anything else needed to better the company.  Even though it isn’t a woman’s  fault God made them carry “Mommy’s anchor on society”, it is what it is.  So as an employer, needing to employ, you pay your most experienced people more.  Hence people that don’t miss 6 months every 2 years eventually end up with more experience and qualifications MORE OFTEN.  I did NOT say always.  Plenty of dumb ass men in the world.  Shit even Nancy Pelosi is married and that is proof there are fates worse than death.

Here is one last obvious one before I bring this altogether.  Because women are more likely to stay home with the little shit machines they are more likely to work a PART TIME jobs.  This also means that they won’t make as much dragging the “national average” down.   It is just a simple fact. When you decide to lump everything together and come up with a “talking point” it works out great.  Problem is not everyone just nods and agrees with whatever these “masters of society” decide to tell them. When comparing Apples to Apples women make just as much as any man in America when doing the same work.  In fact any employer that fails to see talent regardless of what sex is behind it, in this day in age, won’t be around very long.  With all the decisions to be made, don’t let bullshit from either side go unchecked. 

So the next time someone tries to use bullshit figures to argue their point please try to use your head for more than another hole that your baby’s sperm donor decides experiment with. 

Fknbucky

Bringing Sexy Back!

It’s been a crazy busy month because, well, I work for a living.  If you are reading this and haven’t blocked all contact from Fknbucky my guess is you do as well.  So pat yourself on the back and say congratulations, you’re not a piece of shit.  Ha ha, just kidding you suck.  Don’t fret there is hope for you, just as there is hope for me.

I’m not going to apply for my food stamps just yet, but I am going to put myself out there.  Over the last couple years I have spent a lot of time working, traveling, and well paying very little attention to my own personal health.  It has become painfully obvious that I need to change some habits and get my fat ass into shape.  Although part of me still thinks fuck it.  I mean with Obamacare about to make you pay for my shitty lifestyle why should I spend money on a gym membership, healthy food, and education tools to learn a better diet plan.

Here’s the answer.  I do it because I don’t want to feel like shit all the time with no energy.  Plus the fact I traded a life of marriage for one of banging hot chicks, it helps when I’m not fat as fuck. Personality will only get you to second base, for the happy time, you need to have a great smile without a double chin.  Ha ha.  Sorry Mom, I know you read this and I’m just kidding.  I can’t wait to find some beautiful woman to tell me I’m wrong all the time and take half my shit.

So pony up dipshit.  You have out of shape, lazy, don’t give a fuck people to start taking care of because Obama said it is their right to have healthcare you will pay for.  Maybe they can make a sliding scale like when you get a public defender.  The more you make, the more they force you to pay for services.  Maybe with the healthcare, the more you weigh, the more you PAY.  It’s a crock of crap.

So back the point.  I want to sleep with Jessica Alba, and Mom if that happens I’ll marry her and take half her shit.  The world is made of compromise. If only congress and the president could think like me. Imagine that world.  For starters I wouldn’t let some assholes kill one of my ambassadors, but we aren’t going to go there today.  Today is about a journey.  I’m going write about my lifestyle and see if I can lose some weight and get my body fat down.

I’m doing this for myself because I’m a selfish asshole and I’m not worried about what you think.  Putting this down on paper makes it that much harder for me to cheat.  I also hope to inspire someone else that wants to take the necessary steps of becoming healthier.  As someone that is paralyzed from the chest down I’ve got a couple extra challenges, but that is what makes life interesting.  Realizing what your problems are and then solving them, learning the lessons they give you, and not repeating the same mistakes again.

I imagine this won’t be easy, but then again nothing worth having comes easy.  Except for strippers.  Oh man my Mom is going to kill me.  So who’s to say you can’t have a little fun, write a fucked up blog and get healthy.  Look I don’t fault anyone for anything they do.  Well that is a load of bullshit I’m always judging people, but my Mom taught to only talk about them when they aren’t around.  Just kidding I’ll gladly tell you what I really think, all you have to do is ask.  So once again if you choose to live like shit, more power to you!

I’m making a promise to myself today to make a difference and document it.  Don’t make fun of my pudgy picture!

Fknbucky

It’s Monday and hopefully you have the day off to spend with people you care about.  Labor Day is awesome and even though most of you don’t deserve the time off you get it anyway.  Not sure what the point is??  We celebrate the fact that we have jobs by not showing up for a day??  It might be better off called I’m a lazy drunk asshole that didn’t make it to work today, DAY.

I’ve recently read that book “A Stolen Life” which is the autobiography of Jaycee Dugard.  First of all the beginning of this book is one of the hardest things I’ve ever read.  I almost stopped reading it because it is that awful.  The fact that people actually exist in this world that are willing and happy to hurt a child in such ways makes me sad, angry, and gave me a deep feeling of helplessness.

After some thought I figured if she could live through this ordeal and then write about it with such honesty the least I can do is take the time to hear her story.  In this ME ME ME world that we live in, it is important we all take time to understand what others have gone through.  To many times we just go about our days complaining that we can’t find an open line at the grocery store.  Fucking crazy what I catch myself bitching about.

So this little girl was kidnapped at age 11 and kept as a sex slave to some weird bastard for 18 years.  He raped her many times and fathered two children with her.  She was kept in a small room with no toilet during much of this time.  Only after having the baby was she allowed to be in another room.  I don’t have exact information for this blog, but you get the idea.  I think everyone should read this woman’s story and understand that your life might be challenging, but well I think you get the point.

She was finally rescued after 18 years in this hell and I like you would expect her to be angry and want to kill the couple that did this to her.  Not even close.  She understands that everyday she carries the anger with her, she is still a prisoner to them.  The only way for her to be truly free is to forgive and forget them.  This was one of the most touching and mature things I’ve ever read.  The strength it would take to do this is extremely admirable to say the least.

Her daughters are her life now and she is learning with them to be a member of society. Let me be perfectly clear on this next point.  We should spare NO EXPENSE in helping this family heal from this very traumatic situation.  The man that took her was a convicted child rapist and had parole officers visit his house while Jaycee was kept prisoner there.  They should have searched the whole property and found her, but due to circumstances they never did.  It must not ever happen again.  If you commit a crime against a child you give up your “personal space” rights FOREVER.  I don’t care about your “rights” because in my opinion you gave them up the moment you decided to hurt an innocent child.

We are broke as a country, but that is because way to many people that don’t need assistance are sucking on the governmental tit which makes me sick.  If you are able bodied, can think, and not locked up in a small room then you have the OBLIGATION to make something out of yourself.  You are not entitled to take from me because I have taken the time to learn how to care for myself.  If these leeches would get out of the way we could easily take care of Jaycee, her daughters, and others like them for life without question.

On another note it also made me think about how bad shit shapes us as human beings.  She even mentions in the book that she would not change things if somehow the opportunity was there to do so.  She loves her daughters and can’t imagine life without them.  These two children are also innocent victims in a very bad crime.

In this world we are so hell bent on making sure nothing bad happens but in reality many times it is bad things that make us who we are.  It is simply the truth so don’t twist my words around.  I’ve gone through my own trials and truth be told I wouldn’t change it either.  It has made me who I am. So with this thinking I ask you.  Who or what made you??

Was it a bully that picked on you??  Was it a girl that never talked to you??  Was your Daddy mean to you??  Did your mother not hug you enough??   Did someone tell you that it was impossible because you’re black??  Did they say you can’t because you have tits??  Maybe you’re too short??  Maybe you’re too tall.  I’m too Irish to be a porn star so yes we all have problems.

Sometimes accepting the fact that bad shit happened to you is the first step to learning how to kick some ass.  You can’t drag an anchor of anger around with you and hope to  rise above it all.  Yes some people still think that because you’re black that you are inferior.  I can’t change that, but YOU can change how you respond to it.  Hit the books, listen to the self help cd’s in the car, force yourself to become someone so awesome that those people are forced to admit that they are fucking stupid.

It all comes down to what you decide.  Are you going to let them be right or are you going to spend every waking moment making that person wrong.  So remember when you look back “who was it that made you who you are??”

Fknbucky

Murph still as a puppy. Effing love this dog.

Love me some Sunday morning. Most likely I will go lay by my pool and work on my Irish ass getting a tan.  Well the ass won’t be, fuck you get the point.  Funny how quickly one’s mood can go from one extreme to the next in just a matter of seconds.  One moment you are on top of the world and then next you’re looking for any kind of weapon to kill the bastard in front of you.  Okay maybe not everyone has anger issues like that, but I heard some where some people do.  I wouldn’t know first hand.

I was going to an appointment on Friday and left my apartment with plenty of time to spare.  I have a car elevator, I mean an elevator that takes me to my car you jealous whiney bastards.  So I’m waiting by the elevator with my trusty friend Murphy.  She is the best as you already know.  I wait.  I wait some more.  I hear the alarm go off because some asshole is holding the door.  I wait some more.  Finally it starts to move.  The door opens and it is full of some dumbass and boxes.  Moving day for this genius.

He freaks out when he sees me and instead of making room, he hits the door close button and leaves.  Then as I wait longer he unloads all the shit, and I hear the elevator alarm going off again.  Now any normal person would have sent the elevator up to pick me and the dog up, but nope he goes straight to the top and starts loading boxes again.  Me being captain patient decided to calmly go all the way around, to a different elevator, and come in through the front gate.  Total time since locking my door.  A beautiful 25 minutes, which by the way made me late for my appointment.  It was a doctor’s appt with my anger management specialist.  Want to know where the bodies are buried??

I didn’t go crazy or anything I simply waited for them to get back in the elevator and then I slashed their tires.  Don’t worry I made sure to make the cuts on the top of the tire so the knife didn’t get stuck.  Felt good not to confront someone and my therapist tells me I’m making progress.  So continuing on this awesome day of rage. I get to where I’m going and see the doc.  All is good and I’m healthy.  Sweet.  Now I get to make the drive back to my office to finish the day working.  Awesome.

I’m cruising North on the 5 and mean to take the 52 East to head over to Poway.  Many of you have no idea what that means, but who gives a shit, it really isn’t important.  What happened is though I’m a fucking moron and I take 52 West which heads into La Jolla.  One way in, one way out.  Of course I realize my mistake almost instantly and also realize I’m fucked.  Not in a good way either.  There is no place to turn around for a long fricking way.  Making this shit even better traffic was back up the whole way.  Once again I’m completely pissed.  I’m pretty sure my steering wheel became a punching bag for a few minutes.

It was at this moment that Murphy seat belted in next to me, put her paw up on my hand and just looked at me.  It was like some power draining, anger killing, weird ass moment in life.  I felt all the frustration of the day melt away and realized how lucky I am to have an awesome dog, great friends, kick ass career, and hell I even drive a nice car to be stuck in traffic.  I could be kicking it in a hut in Africa if I hadn’t won the lottery at birth.  My problems are fucking petty and guess what SO ARE YOURS.  Stop bitching about how much you don’t have.

So I ended up listening to some 80’s hair band music and enjoying the extra time out of the office.  I was amazed at how quickly I went from wanting to ram cars off the road to just enjoying being on the road.  Once again I have to listen to my own advice, but attitude is a choice.  Want to have a shitty one, then you guessed it, you will.  Want to have a great one, then you get that as well.  I get pretty fired up over politics these days, but in reality I just want everyone I know to be the best they can.  Many of you disagree with me and that is great with me.  Just remember to form YOUR OWN opinions and never let anyone tell you what to think.

Fuck it if that doesn’t work get a dog.  I’m stoked I got mine.

Fknbucky

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I couldn’t find a good gravel travel picture so I settled on this.

Hello suckers.  I hope you all have your vaseline ready because the raping continues with our leader championing the fact that people who actually pay taxes are evil.  Want to know what truly is evil??  The fact 8.5 million people are on disability. Food stamps are at an all time high. People are still collecting unemployment at an all time high.  Who in the fuck do you think pays for these lazy bastards to sit around and milk the system??  Want to know what else??  Guess who these dipshits are going to vote for??  Whoever promises them more free shit.  It makes me sick and if it doesn’t make you sick then you are the problem.

I’ve broken this down for many of you many times, but the message just doesn’t get through.  You still believe babies will die and old people will be burned in their front yards if we attempt to change it.  Let me say this.  Americans are the most compassionate group of people on the planet.  Rich people are the ones that support charities and pay for all the free shit you are enjoying so maybe you should be nice to them. With your jealous, lazy, why not me attitude you completely miss the fucking point once again.

Being an American you are free to do whatever you want.  Well we used to be before a bunch of dickheads passed a bunch laws making drinking and driving illegal.  Bye bye gravel travel.  You will be missed. Okay back on point here.  So now that you are free to do what you want, some people spend their time getting educated so that they can be successful.  Not the shit education you got a I’m a whore State college where you spent 4.5 years binge drinking and seeing how many fat girls you could sleep with.  I’m talking about a real education that allows you to be a useful member of society.

Once you’ve completed this step you find yourself a JOB usually an entry level position with the possibility of promotions if you prove to not suck balls.  Many of you can’t prove that so you’re stuck with ball hair in your teeth and a crappy attitude.  We’ll just call you democrats.  Ha ha I couldn’t resist that one.  So if you’re not spitting hairs right now,  you’ve decided to work hard, learn all you can about the company, and spend your lunch hours working because you want to get ahead in life.  Starting to see a fucking trend here???

So here you are working your way up the ladder.  By continuing to educate yourself and thinking ahead; you force your company/employer to value you and in return pays you more money.  With that more money you can buy more stuff.  Does that make you a monster??   Not in my book, but what the hell do I know??  Once again my opinion is mine and means shit, but I am going to give you some more of it. Holy shit I’m almost to the point of this damn blog and you still don’t have a clue what I’m talking about. Ultimately I’m doing this to get in Jessica Alba’s pants.  I haven’t really thought this through you know.

Okay so pay attention because this next point is completely LOST on anyone with a liberal thought in their head.  I’m going to write it slow so you can let it absorb into your tiny give me some free shit mind.  The reason you work hard to become a millionaire and have nice things is NOT to simply have nice things.  Take a breath I know that is really hard for you lazy fucks that just want my stuff.  You do this because of what it makes of you as a person.  Holy shit overload.  You mean I work hard and become someone of substance because that is what makes the world better Bucky?? Crazy thought huh??

Having money, nice things, and the security of life are all BENEFITS or results of becoming a person of value.  By simply taking from one person and giving to another you are doing absolutely nothing to advance ANYONE.  In fact it is taking steps backward.  This is why you hear about people that lose everything and have it all back in a matter of time.  You can’t take the knowledge away once you know how to work hard and accomplish something.  You can however take away the motivation to do this in the first place robbing someone of the most precious gifts of all. 

Dignity, self confidence, and the ability to write a blog.

Fknbucky

Warm and fuzzy. That is how I feel after a six pack and a couple of happy pills.  Yours truly seemed to like the happy pills way to much once upon a time so I don’t actually take those anymore.  Funny thing drugs.  They seem like fun until you abuse the shit out of them.  Then they become expensive lessons learned in life.  That lesson being, don’t do drugs.  If only someone had told me that when I was younger…..  Yep I’m a moron. 

So life has a funny way of giving you choices and we as Americans have a funny way of blaming EVERYONE but ourselves when we make the wrong ones.  Once you learn to accept personal responsibility for your own actions you will have a happy life.  You decide to eat birthday cake for breakfast, then you accept that your ass no longer fits in one airplane seat.  Okay I’m getting off subject now.  Ha like I had one to start with.  We all know by now there is no fucking point to these blogs. 

Okay so back to the choices of life.   You get to pick where you live unless you are in the prison system and then who gives a shit.  You get to pick what you eat unless you can only afford ramen noodles which we’ve all been there.  Never understood the shrimp flavor, but after a month of chicken anything is welcome. You get to pick what kind of beer you want to drink numbing the fact you’ve wasted most of your life in a drunken stuper and now expect the world to give you some free shit.  If only I can get a new car everything will be better.  I just need designer clothes and rich friends so everything will be okay.  If I had a big fricking chain around my neck I would be able to pick up the slutty girls at the club.  Let me be the first to let you know chains don’t pick up girls.  Drinks pick up girls.  Stiff ones. 

So we have come a long ways in the last 3 paragraphs.  Learning that life gives you choices and you just like the multiple choice math test you failed in high school continually fuck them up.  You’re too scared to move so you stay in your little bubble while bitching about how nothing ever happens around there.  You complain that your TV isn’t big enough, but you never make the choice to read books instead of watching Snooki do jello shots and then roll her pudgy ass around on the floor with Pauly D.  It’s funny to me how many people make shit choices and then bitch about the results.

I’m no saint as we’ve already figured out years ago.  I’ve made some HORRIBLE choices, but I’ve always stood by them and when needed took the lesson on why I’m not doing that shit again. You see if one always lays blame to some place else it becomes impossible to learn anything.  I mean you do learn yet another way to pass the buck, but in reality the only thing worth passing is a blunt.  And you should be passing that shit to me.  Ha ha. Just kidding remember in paragraph 1 when I said NO. 

I thought about all of this when I made the choice to share the sunset picture yesterday.  I chose where I live.  I love it here and it wasn’t easy to make those choices, but now I’m surrounded by like minded people which is awesome.  Here is my ultimate point.  Jessica Alba is the hottest piece of..  Wait…..   Let’s try that again.

You are not bolted down, stuck in cemet, or tied up.  Actually if you are tied up enjoy that kinky shit and stop reading this stupid blog.   You can choose to move to a different state, eat better or worse, drink water or drink beer, and most of all choose anything else you want.  You can change everything about you today if it pleases you.  You’re in America which is the biggest blessing of all.  You are fucking free to make good and bad choices, but they are just that.  YOUR CHOICES, not mine.

Just remember you only get one life.  Don’t spend yours pretending.  Be yourself and have a super kick ass time while your here.

Fknbucky

The leaks didn’t come from the white house.  Awesome.  That means other people have access to top secret information and can’t keep their mouths shut.  How in fuck can anyone believe that shit and still consider themselves somewhat educated.  Let’s do a test.   If you only tell your friend Sally about the wet fart you had on the way to work last week then it is safe to assume that bitch told everyone once they start calling you mud butt during happy hour.  Nothing happy when your sporting some skid marks, but hey at least Sally assured you it wasn’t her.  She said “It is offensive for you to think I said anything”.  Now don’t you feel better??

I’m real tired of this election bullshit.  Mitt has been campaigning for the last 5 years and guess what??  So has Obama.  They are both assholes as far as I’m concerned, but one of them believes the only answer to our problems is for the government to bail us out.   Time will tell what Mitt’s crazy ass is going to do and if he will get a chance to do it.  They both keep claiming the other is out of touch.   How hard is it to realize people need jobs??    Here is how you start.  Get the fuck out of the way.  Just leave us alone and make sure criminals stay locked up.  Protect our borders from crazy jihad dickheads and leave the rest to Bucky.  I will take care of Bucky.  You take care of you.

If you fall under the “Life is to hard” please help me program I want you to die.  Uh I did not stutter you read that correctly.  I’m tired of you leeches sucking the life out of our economy because you are to lazy to get a fucking job.  No more unemployment insurance. Bam.  Bet you take that job at McDonalds now.  Hunger is the best cure for laziness.  Either work or die.  Sometimes I wish I could just let go and express my true feelings.

Want to know why healthcare is expensive??  Because we are a nation of morons.  Need further details??  First of all look in the mirror.  See that person looking back at you??  99% chance he is a dumbass.  Those of you walking back from a mirror shaking your head should go play in traffic.  Yesterday a jury of your peers, I’m not claiming them, granted a widow of a slain police officer 3 million dollars in a wrongful death lawsuit.  How can that be bad Bucky??  Frick off. 

You see this man’s doctor didn’t catch a heart problem.  He then decided to bang a hooker with his partner at 3 AM in some sex crazed slutfest.  Well cheating deputy dipshit keeled over and had a heart attack.  Yep so the widow sued the doctor and won 3 million dollars which will be paid by the rest of us assholes for the rest of our lives.  So his bad decisions lead to me paying more money for a turn your head and cough moment??  I just looked in the mirror because even I’m baffled on how the human race became a slow walk through quicksand.  Here is a thought.  Life is precious, but you are not guaranteed a certain amount of time.  Your family is precious.  If you bang a hooker and die of a heart attack maybe you had it coming??  Don’t worry he was a republican.

So I think we should have the election tomorrow.  I mean who hasn’t made up their minds yet??  Vote for Obama or vote for the not black guy.  I mean come on we are in a debt crisis, unemployment is still above 8%, and the middle east is completely fucked.  I don’t know about you, but how tan my president is, is definitely the number 1 thing I’ll be thinking about come November.  Ah shit, that sounds pretty damn stupid when you write it out.  Okay then gay marriage, yeah that is important when nobody can find a fucking JOB.   You want to bang some guy in his ass and have a piece of paper saying you won’t bang another ass for the rest of you life.  More power to you.  Now get a job.

So just remember our national secrets are not told by anyone in the white house, but by the other people that know about top secret shit.  If you want your family to be set bang a hooker with your partner in a dirty hotel at three AM and then die.  And lastly make sure when you cast your vote only think about skin color and what kind of sex they approve of. 

Fknbucky

You know that filter that many people use before they express their thoughts??  I had mine permanently removed because I hate people that pussy foot around what they really want.  Life is too short.  I know I say a bunch of fucked up things, and it is up to you to think if I actually believe them or not.  In a perfect world you would know how to think for yourself, work for yourself, and in the end take care of yourself.  Instead we continue to blaze down a path of “what if’s” that will always make me question the sanity of it all.

What if someone can’t afford to pay back their credit card debt??  Then they are a dumbass and deserve what they get.  Learn to live within your means, and if you want better shit, get a better work ethic.  Learn more stuff.  Try harder at work.  Fuck show up sober a couple of days a week.  People think it is a joke, but I know dozens of people personally who don’t go to work sober.   Most of them are my co-workers and self medicate because they have to put up with my shit all day, but what do I always say.  It isn’t about me.  ha ha.  It is a race to the bottom in the USA and why not???  Even the secret service is catching on. 

Go out and get a bunch of high priced hookers and when the bill comes just play American.  Ah we can’t afford that.  Can you please just wait a couple days??  You see our boss will be here and he will bail us out.  Ha ha.  It is just the beginning and you are too lazy to see it.  Hell everyone knows you pay the bill in champagne room or bad shit is going to happen.  I guess the secret service needs to put Charlie Sheen on payroll to give them some pointers.  And you think I’m a bad person for laughing at a crappy porn movie one time.  Most of you pervs only take a few moments to browse my blog while you wait for some new videos to pop up on redtube. 

Moving along some little brat starts throwing books and ripping things off the wall during a kindergarden class in GA.  The police come in and put some handcuffs on mommy’s future felon.  Good for them.  The parents say the kid was traumatized??  No shit.  How about a little discipline at home before you unleash your hell child on the rest of the world.  When I was 5 years old I was traumatized that my dad would fucking kill me if I acted up in public.  Know what happened??  I behaved myself until I got old enough to decide I didn’t give a fuck.  Of course I got into trouble and had to pay the piper.  Looking back it wasn’t a good plan, but I’m not that smart.

If your child went to school and went ape shit what would you do??  I would smile politely and say sorry a million times, put the little fucker in my car, and then scare the absolute shit out of him/her for about an hour. Maybe this is true, maybe it isn’t, but I think if kids just had some discipline BEFORE they get to school we wouldn’t have to rely on teachers to raise Mommy’s little welfare bump.  2 more kids and she will hit the platinum level!! Nothing like striving for greatness in America!! 

A perfect example of parenting is the Mom of one of the Tulsa assholes that went around shooting black folks. 

 She says quote: “He is a good boy”

I say quote:  “No he isn’t he shot 5 people you dumb bitch.” 

Let me remind you she is in prison for 18 years for arson.  Making excuses for people is mostly the problem up and down this country.  We give everyone a big fat excuse every time they come up short when we should be giving them A REASON to fucking try again.  Except in this case where her parenting skills are obviously flawed and I’m not sure enough alcohol exists to make her pretty again if you know what I mean.  So GM, Wall Street, AIG, and others get bailed out when the wallet gets light, but as Americans we draw the line on bailing out secret service agents when they fall short of cash for Columbian whores.  Just wanted to be sure I understand.  Repub’s and Demo’s are all on a huge shit list. 

Love your neighbor, unless she is married. 

Fknbucky

Monday.  The day after the 3 days of weekend binge drinking when you have to try and remember how many people you owe apologies too before next weekend so you can do it all again.  Some of you are all grown up and pace yourself and to that I say Fuck you.  Pacing yourself is for amateur porn stars that think people actually like watching that crap.  I remember once this high school kid had a porn dvd that some other high school kid left with him as collateral for some weed.  I could really get to the nuts and bolts of why, but it doesn’t matter.  What does matter is we watched it and there was a huge fly that landed on the dude’s balls for like five minutes.  It was funny, but then again my sense of humor isn’t exactly normal.

Kind of like when this chick I used to “hang out” with used the term “fly on the lip poor”.  I never heard this before, but when she explained it I understood.  Those commercials that everyone ignores begging for money, just the cost of a cup of coffee per day, and you can save little Timbukatoo.  Send him to school, give him medicine, and blah blah you know you already changed the channel long before they give you any information on how to actually donate your hard earned money.  So you are so poor you don’t even care flies crawl around on your lip.  Sad huh??  Still think you are getting a raw deal here in  the completely unfair USA.  

How many of those kids have you sponsored??  I haven’t done any either so I’m an asshole too.  I just admit it.  I do give money to charities that supposedly do some good over there, but like most organizations how do you know how much actually gets to the kids??  These do gooder’s have to fund the people in the administration and in the end you feel good, but in reality some asshole just got a six figure annual income.   Makes me sick, but once again I’ve done nothing to stop it just like you.

Anyone else heard about these FEMA “camps” that are being built all over the USA??  I saw it last night and it has my attention.  Old military bases being transformed into residential living centers that have locked doors and barb wire fences that are aimed at keeping people IN not out.  Troubling to say the least and you should educate yourself about them.  I know I will be in the next few months. I’m not one for conspiracy theories, but I’m also not one to get blindsided by an out of control group of people.  It would not take to much for civil unrest to happen in this country and for your own safety the law reads our president can execute martial law taking the place of all elected individuals in your community. 

That kind of stuff is enough to make me want to start smoking weed again.  Life was so different when I didn’t give a fuck about what was going on around me.  My only worry was making sure my jar (never keep good weed in a bag) was filled with enough purple cush to quell the anger.  Now I write stupid blogs and post them on Facebook along with pictures of my dog.  Fuck I used to be cool.   The lady that cuts my hair mentioned “Wow you are really putting on some pounds.”  This makes me almost feel bad for the Chicken McStupid blog and the fact I make fun of fat people all the time.

Instead of going home and eating a couple cartons of Ben & Jerry’s liberal named fat sauce, I went to the store and bought some veggies.  I will be dieting and exercising for the next couple weeks to get my fat ass back into shape.  I won’t be suing Mickey D’s, instead I will take responsibility for my shitty health decisions I’ve made the past 8 weeks and get it together.  I’m glad she said that because it really motivated me.  I love people that tell the truth.  If you don’t have the balls to say exactly what I need to hear, then you are an awful friend.  For the record, smoking weed does NOT induce weight loss.  Once Richard Simmons figured that out, he became a speed freak and invented sweating to the oldies.  He is a weird little man.

On the honesty front though, a word of advice don’t go calling out all of your obese friends this afternoon thinking you are doing them a favor.  Some people enjoy being lied to and live in a little bubble world.  Have any of you heard about this man from North Korea that escaped from that prison camp??  Talk about a bubble world.  That is the worst thing I’ve ever heard about and I’m going to read his book ASAP.  Hell it has to be better than the “Hungar Games”.  Did I ever fuck up there.  The first two books were cool when the kids were killing each other, but the third one… Holy teenage girl drama.  I delt with that shit in high school and no reason to relive it. 

Just a bunch of shit today.  Kind of felt good to rant away though.

Fknbucky