Posts Tagged ‘Air

02
Jun
24

No More Air for FknBucky

By Bucktown 2 Comments
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Let’s face it you are all a bunch of sick puppies that want to know the details of FknBucky almost dying. You will get them because I promised to always be honest on here. It has been a very dark road and one I wish I could have avoided, but I will make jokes cause that is what I do. If I was about to be shot in the head, I would ask the shooter to promise to tell the hospital that I did NOT die of Covid. It is just who I am. Marry a funny man if you want to have a fun life. I’m taking apps (women only), bunch of savages….

FYI, My hand and arm are still numb and won’t work correctly. My strength is about 40%. Prayers and respect to all Quads. If you know a Quad or see one, give them an hug and say how amazing their strength is. Some of the strongest people on Earth. As my hand comes back I’ll be able to type and blogs will come faster.

On to dying. I was at home for days stuck in bed feeling sick. I couldn’t get up to take Annie outside or feed her. I could not get up to use the restroom properly and my home became a complete mess. It was overwhelming in so many ways and very disheartening to a person like me that demands the best from myself. To no longer have the strength to live with the independence I cherish came very close to crushing my spirit in the ultimate way. It hurt so much inside. I don’t care about pissing on myself as it happens when people get older and when a person is a paraplegic. The disheartening and soul crushing part was not being able to clean up myself.

My Mom (Carol – Thank You so much) came out to help after I admitted I was in a bad way. My breathing was horrid. I’ve been doing it for 45 years, but for some reason I could not get air. I had to sit cross legged with my head down to breathe. Imagine having to stay in one spot/position to get air. It sucked. Life was happening around me, with people coming and going, the lawn being mowed, packages coming, and I was a statue taking small breaths to simply stay alive. After a week, I called an ambulance. Have I ever mentioned how stubborn I am??

In the ER they found my kidney to be infected again. WOW. I could have told them that. I go thru the motions and get checked into room 7911. Small room. First time in my life I had…. Who knows. I started that sentence earlier and can’t remember what the heck I was planning to say. Oh now I do. Oxygen. First time they put the oxygen on me. It was weird. Didn’t get me high though like they say in fight club. Stupid hospital oxygen. I spent days in that room stuck in bed. No moving just fighting to breathe all day and night. Ma spent the night because it was so rough. My eyes were yellow, body beaten down, very little humor or smiles from me, just pain, hurt, and worry.

Day 4 or 5 I was up again. No sleep in the hospital. NONE. Remember my spasms were going crazy the entire time. They always wanted to lay me flat on my back , irritate the kidney, and make my legs & stomach go insane. My stomach spasms are so strong I can’t breathe when they go. It becomes a clamp on my lungs that makes taking a breath impossible. Think about how scary that would be. Sitting there minding your own business and WHAM you can’t bring air into your body with no idea when it will stop. Now imagine it happens a hundred plus times a day/night.

The clock was 6 AM. The nurse and doctor were talking about discharging me that day. My Mom and I insisted that would not be good for me. I told Mom that I would die if they sent me home as I could feel a lot was wrong still. Everything they were doing was not improving my situation. I couldn’t breathe and my spasms were still going crazy. Remember I had been struggling to breathe for weeks, but now it was real. I was gasping and using all the tiny bit of strength I had to get the smallest amounts of air. It is a crazy feeling to try so hard bring air in and get nothing over and over and over and over…. I was getting legit scared. I have a lot I want to do yet in life. I don’t want to die, not like this…. A fast car on a mountain road, spontaneous combustion, a crazy ex-girlfriend and a kid that ain’t mine, or my favorite going out with a smile at a decently old age after giving away every penny I have to those less fortunate than I am.

The more I struggled the more people came into my tiny room to watch me die. The door was a huge wooden one that the nurse and doctor kept shutting very hard which loud noises make my spasms go off making it double hard to breathe again. Once the doctor came in yelling at me and Mama bear yelled “Hey watch your TONE!!!” My Mom sat back and told me to trust the doctors, but when it goes too far this Farm Mama will stab you with a pitch fork.

Breath so bad it deserves 3 pictures.

The big time doctor came in. He had scrubs on and was a, well male, so you know he was in charge.. Oooo that will get some all stirred up. RELAX. Women are super important. Who else would hold stuff while the doctor works???? He was right up in my grill and clearly ate dog poo for breakfast. Worst breath ever. I was dying. He kept telling me to breathe but I was trying to blow his shit breath away. Take air in, no way, not smelling like that. Here comes death. All the money and time to train a doctor they can’t have one day to learn how to pop an ALTOID before getting in the face of a dying person. Heck, you have a woman right there ready to hold them for you. Ha.

If you mad at a couple men/women jokes this blog is going hurt long term. Take a breathe. Smile. See how easy that is. I couldn’t do it the other day. Don’t get upset at stupid words. If you do, you’ll never have a happy day. On to my death.

I had to see my Mom’s face as I going out. No one should ever have to see that. My Mom’s sad/crushed face while smelling shit breath from a doctor telling me to breathe like I somehow forgot in the last 6 seconds. Pretty much the worst way to go. I couldn’t speak anymore. Not sure if I would have said if I could have. Maybe “Goodbye Ma or Someone got a tic tac for dog shit breath doctor here??” It is a toss up. Then I ran out of gas. Completely. I stopped breathing. I had not one more gasp in me. I just stopped.

FknBucky

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17
Apr
21

RIP Prince Philip

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
Categories: Uncategorized
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1921. That is forever ago. I looked up the number one song for that year. It is the most racist thing I’ve seen in a long time. I will not be going that route for the blog today. 1921 is when Prince Philip was born. I think the Royals are stupid, but only the young ones. They’ve become a Kardashian reality show and I give them zero time or thought. Now Prince Philip is a very interesting fellow. He married the princess that would become a Queen of England forever. She will never die. She eats children burgers. Haha. Told you it isn’t going away. Where do you think Pippa learned it from?? If 23 year old Bucky met Pippa I would be writing this blog from Buckingham palace. The place is pretty much named after me so… There was a time. My game was strong. Alright I have a thousand fun stories, but its not that kind of blog.

I love to travel, to experience life and new things, and truly inject myself into something different. I think that is why I have moved so many times. That and the warrants. Can you imagine the stories Prince Philip must have had?? Unlimited money to go anywhere you wanted. That would be cool, but on the other hand he never got to experience real life in those places. Everyone catered to him and treated him like royalty. You don’t understand a place without spending a couple days with the locals. Think of Rose in the movie Titanic. She had this lavish lifestyle, but never really lived until she went below deck and got loaded with the peasants. Good thing she did too or no way is Leo giving up that door.

I used to have a joke when I was about 23. I would cheers everyone at the table and say we are celebrating!! When asked why, I would respond with my future wife was born today. I’ve had to change that up a bit as I get older because it is more creepy than funny when I’m in my 40’s. Now I cheers and say “she got her first job as a gas station clerk” today!! Let’s face it. A 22 year old girl that marries me is most likely not going to be college educated. It is okay I have it all planned out. We get married, I throw a couple kids in her, and then 11 years later I’m worth 600K in life insurance and perish in a mysterious house fire that was started with C4 explosives. Sounds more fun than dying of prostate cancer or some crap. Wow. I completely forgot what the heck I was writing about.

Back on track. They are having a funeral for Prince Phil today and just take a moment to think of all the things he lived thru. WW2, the Beatles, air in shoes, airplanes, cars, going to the moon, and the best of them all, you get to pick what gender you are regardless of the plumbing!! What is not to love there?? He did fight in WW2 and was the recipient of a good number of medals. I’ll let you google him and read up on like I did. You won’t do it though so there is that. Face it you’re still thinking about later tonight when you’re at the bar and can use my joke. Go ahead it is funny. Fat Karen might even let you take a ride tonight. Enjoy that.

100 years is a long time to live. I’m fascinated by people that have been on Earth that long. My Grandmother being one of them. The stories they tell of different times and hardships. We are spoiled as people now. Most people don’t work for anything. You aren’t growing a garden to be able to can vegetables in the fall so you can feed your family over the winter. You aren’t milking cows, feeding chickens, or cutting firewood to simply survive. Nope. You complain if the air conditioner doesn’t work fast enough.

I admire Prince Philip. From everything I read he was a very good person. On his own he was a mans man. He didn’t have to take a back seat for anyone except for the Queen. To me it is admirable that he did do this. He must have really loved her. I think that is pretty cool. My guess is the Queen won’t live much longer mainly because she is 1,000 years old already, but losing her partner after all these years will most likely take a toll on her and truthfully whatever does happen after life on Earth she needs to be with Philip. I mean all of that in a kind way. Really I do.

I was pretty tough on the Royals a few weeks back, but thats because of the new drama Queen BS they have become. I’ve read about the Queen and Prince Philip and respect them both. So Rest In Peace Prince Phil. You’ve earned it.

Be kind to others. The only way to make the world better is for you to make yourself better. Think about it.

FknBucky

31
Jan
21

Murph-Dog and the flight attendant

By Bucktown 1 Comment
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I think my legs read my last blog. 4:05 this AM. Oh well I got that off my chest so no need to go backwards. I do however think the last week of writing has been pretty deep into my world. On this cold and wet Sunday morning I wanted to share something of a fun story with you. I miss my friend Murphy all the time. I struggle to call her a dog simply because she was so much to me than a dog. Not everyone can understand what I mean, but once you have a bond with a furry friend like I did you finally get it. I used to tease my friend Brian A LOT about his dog Jazzy, but later once I had Murphy in my life I understood and probably should have apologized. I called him stupid and threw a beer can at his head instead. He got the message. That flying 12 oz missile was full of I’m sorry and love.

I now have Annabel, but Murphy was the friend that changed my heart when it came to these awesome buddies. She deserves all the credit in the world. Okay I have to get to a point here or you’ll be on YouTube watching Lil Xan videos wondering where you went wrong in life. How is that little troll famous?? I had no idea who he was until Bam Margera (I follow on IG cause the dude is a fucking trainwreck) posted a photo with him yesterday. Just watching 30 seconds of one video made me dumber. I will make this promise to the human race, if I am ever close enough to this weird little dipshit I will kill him. It is the least I can do. Still not on topic.

I wanted to share a fun Murphy story with you all today just because they make me smile and that is point of Sundays. To reflect on the week now behind us accepting what happened, recognizing the lessons we needed to learn, and to get ready for the kick ass week we are about to start. A clean slate all for you. It hasn’t been written yet and you can do whatever you want starting right now. Make good choices, LOOK for ways to help others, and most importantly do something kind for a stranger every day expecting nothing in return. If you don’t currently do this you are missing out on the easiest life changing experiences. Just do it.

There are two stories I am thinking of and I’m deciding on the airplane story although the story about the young lady with CP is quite possibly the cutest thing I’ve ever had happen to me unless you consider star gazing in Arizona with world famous models a cute thing. When you see me in person please ask about the young lady with CP and Murphy story so I can do it justice. You can ask me about the stars in AZ, but most likely you won’t get to hear that story. That one is just for me.

I was flying somewhere with Murphy again. My old job in Cali required me to fly A LOT. Sometimes multiple trips in the same week and with Murphy coming along 100% of the time she learned airports and airplanes very well. She knew the drill. I was amazed at how she knew when the big suitcase came out we were going on a trip so she would not drink a lot of water because she understood there wasn’t potty breaks on the plane. She would CHUG water once we got the hotel, but prior to that she would barely touch water usually just taking a sip to wet the whistle until she knew there was access to potty time. I was almost always in awe at how many things she learned on her own.

I am usually the first person or last onto the airplane. I go down early so I can get into the aisle chair, make it down to my row, and then scoot over to the window without 150 people staring at me. I was the first one on for this particular trip, by this time Murphy had literally taken/been on hundreds of flights, and understood the process better than most humans. As I’m being strapped into the aisle chair I asked a flight attendant to take my backpack to my seat. For the sake of this blog we will say my seat was 11A. This meant my seat was row 11 seat A which is the window seat on the right side of the airplane. The flight attendant did exactly this. Once he left with the backpack another flight attendant showed up to see if she could help in anyway.

I am still holding Murphy‘s leash at this point, but decided to let go of it so that the guys can load me up onto the plane. When I let go of the leash I say to Murphy “Seat 11A” which prompts her to run onto the plane. She runs down the aisle until she sees my backpack (2nd flight attendant never saw the backpack) and then jumps into the row 11 seats on the seat A side. The look on the flight attendants face was priceless as she looked at me and said “Your service dog knows how to read??”

I said “Of course she knows how to read.” If you know me at all, you know I said that with a very straight face and loved it. She was so amazed the entire flight and I never told her differently. I think about this sometimes and wonder if she is still out there telling people how this guys service dog knew how to read. I prefer to think she is simply because it makes it that much more awesome. I love fucking with people and this one is right up there.

Do something kind for a stranger expecting nothing in return.

FknBucky

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