Posts Tagged ‘anger



25
Nov
21

45 Seconds

Justice for Ryan Cooper. No one will forget him and we will search for the person/persons responsible forever. The truth will come out and you will be held accountable.

When I write these blogs I have a thought in my head that I can only get out by putting the words down on paper. I think about things constantly as the world around me changes I analyze everything in real time deciding how I feel about it. This is just the way I’m wired I guess and it isn’t changing at this point. The reason I say that is because yesterday was a roller coaster of emotion on my 8-9 hour drive to Alabama to spend Thanksgiving with my brothers family. I lived here for a good amount of time before I moved to Charlotte so quite of people in this small community know me as the better looking, smarter, definitely more intelligent brother.

I witnessed a semi truck drive over a car in Atlanta. I was on the phone with a business, when 2 lanes over (6 lanes at this point) a car tried to drive under a semi and was driven over. My immediate response was ”Oh My God” and I’m quite certain people lost their lives. It looked really bad, my heart broke for those involved, and I thought of their families getting ready for a fun holiday tomorrow/today with family only to have it become a tragedy. I drive A LOT. More than any of my friends. I’ve driven from Coast to Coast and from Canada to Mexico at least a dozen times. I am baffled by the horrible driving I witness daily.

Two hours after witnessing this accident I was caught up in traffic slowing to a stop and for the most part doing 5-10 mph for over 30 minutes. I finally got up to where the accident was only to see it was on the Northbound side of the Freeway. The only reason I was in stop and go traffic for 30 minutes was because looky-loos had to slow down and look at the crap sandwich on the other side of the freeway. I made a very sweet video about my feelings during this situation. If cursing offends you please don’t watch it. I believe in the 33 second video only 2 words are not cuss words. It is mostly for shock value and I hoped it would give my friends a laugh.

I made it to the exit in Southern Alabama and was only about 7 minutes from my LA (Lower Alabama) home. I pulled up to a very familiar intersection where lots of flashing lights were going on as the fire department was out directing traffic and not letting people turn left. I was going right at this T intersection, but still rolled down my window to confirm that was okay. I asked ”Can I go right??” and got this response from a sassy firewoman ”I don’t know, can you???”.

Clearly she knew who I was. FknBucky is famous. Thought you knew. I asked if my not as good looking as me brother was at the accident and she replied ”yes”. I asked if it was bad and she again said ”yes”. Little Brother has been on the volunteer fire department for almost a decade now and has seen a lot of bad things. Being this close to the freeway he has seen things most of us pray daily we will never have to witness. This part of the blog is going to be hard to read. People need to understand the consequences of doing stupid crap in a car.

The driver of the car thought it would be a good idea to pass other cars on this two lane highway. Accelerating to well over the speed limit the driver pulled out in the oncoming traffic lane and started to pass other drivers. I know this stretch of road and there is a town in about 10 miles. Even if they could do 80 miles an hour the whole way a person maybe would arrive 45 seconds sooner, but I’ll let you judge if that 45 seconds was worth the gamble. What is the wager Bucky?? Well, if you win you arrive to the 25 mile an hour zone and stop light 45 seconds sooner than if you had just drove the speed limit. If you lose people in your vehicle die.

While passing the cars it is believed a car came at this car so to avoid a head on collision the driver had to swerve quickly back into the correct lane. When they did this at extremely unsafe speeds this driver drove straight into the back of another vehicle. The vehicle lost control, flipped and rolled, and got all kinds of smashed up before finally coming to a rest. There were very bad injuries to the people in that all vehicles involved. I know of a similar accident where all 4 teenagers in the car were decapitated. Easily avoidable incidents like this happen way to often. In fact a few years ago about a couple hundred yards from my brothers house a group of kids were going to fast, swerved to miss a dog, lost control of the vehicle when it hit a concrete power line pole, and two 15 year old kids died. I wrote about that in a blog the day after.

I would much rather write a blog about being thankful for all the good in your life today. The truth is you should be thankful for everything. Instead I’m awake at 4 AM with this on my mind making it impossible to sleep until I get this out of my head. Just slow down. I see cars everyday that weave from one lane to the next cutting people off, passing on the right, and just driving like an asshole only to take the next exit. If this is you – KNOCK it off. If you constantly gamble the lives of people in your car and the lives of people in cars around you it is only a matter of time that you will lose the bet.

Life is beautiful. It is a gift. It is fragile and NOT guaranteed. It could be over too soon, but gambling your life on the way to Walmart is simply stupid. I write about this with a heavy heart, but if one person thinks about this blog, takes my advice to slow down, and not drive like an idiot it will be worth it. Please share this message with people you care about. The families of all the people involved in the accidents yesterday should be having a great day cooking a turkey today. Instead they are in shock, heartbroken, and possibly planning a funeral. 45 eff’ing Seconds…….

FknBucky

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Please take a moment to thank the volunteer Firemen/Firewomen and the volunteer Ambulance folks. They see things no one should have to witness and give their time to take care of others.

18
Nov
21

Choose Wisely

Justice for Ryan Cooper. We will not stop asking questions until they are answered. I am 2,000 miles away, but I still keep an line of communication with friends in Traer. They are as passionate and pissed off today as they were the day this happened. You can’t hide forever and the truth will come out.

I am what I would consider well traveled. I have barely scratched the surface on how much I want to travel as I would love to never spend a day in the same place. I thrive in this situation. Multiple times in my life I’ve gone on road trips across the USA without a plan. I would drive until dark, find a hotel, and then crash for the night. In the morning I would go to breakfast and ask locals what was cool around there to go see. A kind conversation with a local will always yield some great advice on what to go see. This is what we would do. Spend the day checking out the natural beauty of this world in a town I’ve never heard of and will most likely never return to. Once done we would drive a few hours until dark and repeat the same process. Here is a HUGE sentence so pay attention: ”You are not that busy, life is not that crazy, and whatever you are stressed out about is not impossible.”

For unknown reasons humans tend to build these imaginary walls around them and then complain they can’t get out of the box. You built the walls. You only have to decide to knock them down. Once again I say to you ”It is that simple.” STOP wasting time and days on things that don’t matter. You don’t get it Bucky, my problems are way harder than everyone else’s. To that I say Bullshit!! I can’t pay rent, Bucky. So what is stressing out about it solving?? Nothing. Get a part time job. Cancel cable. Stop stressing and start doing. Okay I’m getting off topic here. Doesn’t make it mean less though. Print this paragraph and staple it to your forehead.

My point today is don’t waste precious time. We don’t know when this amazing journey called life is going to end. I live in an apartment building close to Uptown Charlotte. It is nice enough, rent is fair, and over the last 6 years I’ve had a good number of next door neighbors that I talk to when I see them. My current neighbor is Chris. The day he moved in I was stealing his power. I had a power chair that needed charging in the back of my van. Instead of dragging it out, I used an extension cord, and plugged it in to his patio outlet. In my defense that apartment had been empty over a month so…. I came outside to see my cord unplugged and thrown back over the wall towards my van. My first thought was okay somebody moved in. I knocked on his door and apologized for stealing power. We talked, he explained he didn’t know what to do so he just unplugged it, and then gave me permission to use it anytime I needed.

His name is Chris and he died a couple days ago. He jogged daily and had a beautiful white mutt that he would take with him. Always a kind word and we would chat for a couple moments when we ran into each other in the hallway. Chris was only 26 years old. He was running a marathon which was a hobby of his, and collapsed near the finish line dead. I’m told his mother and step-father were at the finish line of the marathon and witnessed him collapsing. There was absolutely nothing anyone could do. He was just gone in an instant without warning. I can’t think of a more unfair situation. It doesn’t matter how much money you have, how many cool toys you have, or how long your bucket list is because when your ticket is punched, that is the end.

Chris’s death has to be insanely hard on his family, but I hope you, me, and everyone can use this tragedy to remind ourselves to stop waiting for the right time to start living. You have to start today. Right now. No more excuses. Writing is my passion. I love doing it and hope one day I will be good enough to make a living doing it. If you want to help that dream come true please give me 5 stars, sign up to have my blogs emailed to you when I publish one, share it with other people you know, and make comments below.

I didn’t know Chris super well, but I guarantee you that I’ll never forget him. I will use his story to fuel my drive and my relentless pursuit to make my dreams come true. To come full circle and tie in the beginning of this blog with the end I will tell you this. Traveling as I have, talking to people like I do, and just enjoying new people I am bound to know more tragedy. Learning wisdom from other peoples lives is a tool for a more enjoyable life, but you have to be willing to accept the message. Chris died at 26 doing everything right. If his story doesn’t light a fire in you I have no idea what will. You have complete control in your life. Make decisions your 80 year old self will be happy about. No ones turns 80 and thinks ”Man I should have wasted more time stressing over dumb crap.”

I don’t have pictures of Chris so I added one of Annabel. RIP neighbor. A true tragedy.

Learn to enjoy your day instead of constantly bitching about the long line at Walmart, the President, your kids, the neighbor with a loud car, or whatever else gets your panties bunched up. Life is either awesome or sucks. You get to decide. Choose wisely.

FknBucky

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24
Sep
21

What if vs when

Another week comes to an end. Summer 2021 has come to an end. In a week we will be in the last quarter of this year. How does time go by so fast?? I do quite a bit of reflecting on my life. I don’t mean looking back with regrets, but looking back to see how much progress I’ve made on my goals for life. I only have one question for you. If not now, then when??? When will you start your own business, when are going to travel to the place you dream of, when are you going to talk with the cute girl at the office?? If you start looking at life with ”when” instead of “what if” you will find it to be more rewarding.

What if is what dreamers ask. They secretly wish this and that happened or will happen with no real plan. Days, months, and years go by without any tangible progress towards the ”what if” you keep saying to yourself. What if I move? What if I go back to school? What if I talk to her? What if I go out on my own? While asking yourself these questions can be useful, it can also lead to negative thinking that always finds a way of coming true. In life you ALWAYS get what you think about. Read the book ”The Secret” if you haven’t already. If you have read it again. The issue of asking “what if” is the answers you give yourself. If I move, I won’t have friends there, if I go back to school and fail, if I talk to her she might not like me, and if I start my own business and don’t make it????

The negative answers always come and now you have already been unsuccessful without doing a darn thing. Seems like a bad plan to make your life awesome. Change your way of thinking by simply using a different word. When I move I’ll have the opportunity to start with a clean slate and the reality is your friends aren’t going anywhere. When I go back to school I’ll be on my way to building my self confidence, learn new skills, and be on way to making more money doing something I love. When I talk with her I may find out she has been waiting on my dumbass to say hello. When I start my own business I can finally start to do things my way and stop making others money.

I started my own business 2 years ago. COVID didn’t help, but there will always be challenges. If it wasn’t COVID there would be something else to overcome. Regardless of skin color, gender, rich, poor, sexuality, or any of the other labels media and politicians use to divide us there will be problems. If your parents did their job you will have no problems identifying them and solving them. You don’t understand Bucky. Some random guy called me a racist word in the grocery store parking lot. Perfect now you have an excuse to be angry and complain the world is against you. You give a lot of power to some ignorant moron you’ll never see again. I say ”Fuck that guy.” Not literally. Move on and forget it. Explain to me how arguing with idiots helps you reach your goals…

The beauty of being a ”when” thinker is you will subconsciously start to put a date on it. When I talk to that girl tomorrow I’ll know if she is interested or not, allowing me to stop wasting energy on the ”what if”. You might find out her Dad is the racist you ran into at the Piggly Wiggly which helps you decide if you want to raise little white power babies. Racism isn’t funny Bucky. Thanks for pointing out some obvious shit. Now move on and take this big sack of worthless anger with you. I hope one day you learn to just leave it and not fill that sack up in the first place. Lots of great people in this world, don’t waste time on crappy people, and learn to ask yourself “when” instead of “what if”.

Many times the things that I write are a reminder to me instead of a ”lesson” to you. I get caught up with the anger, the sadness, the fear of failure, and the worthless habit of blaming others for my problems. That last one will be another blog coming soon, but for today I really hope you use this blog as motivation to reflect on your own life to see what questions you’re asking.

I wrote this at 4 AM this morning, but just getting around to sharing it now. Not sure where this all came from, but it sounded good to me. I’m a when person and not a what if.

FknBucky

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20
Sep
21

Just Fix it

A lot of time has gone by since I’ve written a blog. Well one I’m actually going to share. It has been a hard summer personally for me and for a lot of people I know. I found myself going further and further into this funk that didn’t seem to brush off. I don’t know why and I couldn’t shake it off like I normally do. The hits kept coming. I’m strong, but even strong people only have so deep they can go. The deepest of wells that hold willpower eventually have a bottom. I came to the realization that no matter what I do next year is going to be harder than this one. The one after that will be harder yet. That is a tough thing to admit to yourself.

Truth is I need to get into shape and get my weight down. The COVID excuse is over and it is time to find some actual willpower. My shoulder is super sore. I have trouble transferring right now that leads me to fall trying to get into my van. Usually worse in the AM because of my spasms. When I lift to get into my van my whole body flexes and makes me go into the fetal position which makes it impossible to get my butt on the seat. Depending on the slope of the land around me my chair will either stay put or push away just far enough I can’t get back into it. Yeah I have to think that thru every time I park. I fell this AM getting into my van so that wound is still fresh.

I don’t tell you these things for sympathy, but rather so you see how real life is. I got up, continued my day with a smile, and left the anger, the hurt, and the weakness back in the parking lot. No reason to drag that bullshit around the rest of the day. I also found my way to shaking the funk off and it came from the easiest of things to do. Be myself. Just be Bucky and stop trying to analyze my problems to death. I’m fat. Lose weight. Pretty damn simple. We tend to overcomplicate the shit out of problems we face. Stop eating sugar/candy all day. Drink water instead of soda, Gatorade, and the rest of the crap. Willpower. Simple.

I also got back to doing for others. This is a huge part of my life. When my time is done and I’m standing at the gates of Big Bang Theory, I want them to say ”Wow Bucky, you made a difference everyday to someone’s life.” That to me is the most important thing I can do with my life. Just help others. Stop spending all day worrying about things you can’t/won’t solve overnight. I use my weight as the example here. Dwelling on it 24/7 is not going to speed the process up, but it will kill me on the inside if I don’t stop. Find ways to make the world better around you which will keep your mind from dwelling. You don’t have to go build a house with habitat for humanity right out of the gate. Baby steps.

I walk Annie in the same area almost every single day. There is a dog poop trash can that I deposit Annie’s little treasures into every day. I noticed on Thursday the lid was not attached any longer. The bolt had rusted out leaving the lid in limbo. This is a bag full of dog shit in 100 degree heat. To say it smells is, well true. It smells really really really bad. Having the lid on helps keep the smell down to a minimum. On Friday I went by and the lid is on the ground about 4 feet from the can. Not good. I thought man they need to fix that shit. Fast forward to Saturday. The lid is still on the ground and the smell is worse than Joe Biden’s breath. Hard to have fresh breath with your head up your ass all day. I instantly think “fuck it” I gotta fix this damn thing. It wasn’t hard and took very little time.

I went back to my apartment, found some bolts, and then went up to fix it. Two problems. First bolt was skinny enough, but not long enough to go thru both holes. Second ones were to fat and would not go thru the hole no matter how hard I pushed. So I gave up and said ”screw it”. Let someone else deal with it. ha. No chance. By the way if you are giggling at my bolts that is why we are friends. I went back to my apartment to look around for something to solve this problem. That is when I saw them. Almost standing with their hand up saying pick me!! You guessed it. Zip Ties. Suck it Poop Can. I’m came to win.

I put the lid back on and used two zip ties per side. It was dark outside and no one walked by while i was doing this so I’m not getting any credit for it. If you only do good things to get praise you need to rethink your philosophy. Do good things because it is the right thing to do. If you see something wrong and you have the ability to fix it, then do it. I grew up on a farm. You didn’t walk by problems with fixing it. It didn’t matter who was to blame for it, if you got credit for it, but it did matter it got done. Walking thru the barn and notice a bag of corn is leaking out then you fix it. Whether it was you or someone else, that bag of corn had to be picked up. We have gotten to a place that many people will say ”Look at that, how wasteful, someone should really pass a law saying corn should be sold in stainless steel packaging.”

Everyone is so focused on solving the problems of the whole damn country. Fix your own backyard. Help your neighbor. Stop trying to ”fix” some person in Rhode Island that don’t want you. Pick up that one split bag of corn and go about your life. Imagine a world where everyone took pride in their home and worked to make the world better by fixing their own neighborhood. Lead by example. Trust me, if you do it enough people will notice, and if you’re not a self righteous prick they will follow your lead.

Be awesome, be happy, and be the guy/gal that puts the lid on the shit bucket.

I hope you’re ready. FknBucky has a lot to say!

FknBucky

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22
May
21

Friday – Not the movie

Funny I never name blogs until after I write them, but not today. I know where I’m going with it and I’m not all that stoked about it. Problem is I feel like I have to bring it up again. And again. And again. People are so selfish that it numbs my mind sometimes. I deal with stuff everyday that you don’t even know about. Why would you?? Many of you don’t live in a city, use a wheelchair, and lets be honest you are drunk by 9 AM. That is why I love you Mom. Drunk or not she reads every blog.

I had to get my van inspected yesterday because in NC every year you have to pay $30 to have someone tell you that your vehicle is drivable. I got a guy though that helps me out. They take the dead hooker out and ask no questions. They did ask I get there at 7 AM which isn’t a real problem for me as I’m usually up early anyway. That is what I did, but as I pulled up I noticed an Auto Zone near by. Who cares about Auto Zone Bucky?? Great question. Not me anymore although last year while waiting for my van to be inspected I spent $100 at this Auto Zone killing time. I still have the armor all wipes rolling around my van that I never use. Waste of money those where. They don’t get blood out of leather. Don’t ask questions.

I noticed the car parked out front in between the blue man spots. Notice the club. Yeah cause car thieves look for that white piece of shit to joyride in. You can’t even fit your “few extra lbs” tinder date in that tiny white car. I did take a picture, but didn’t worry to much about it as it was 6:45 in the morning. Maybe some dumbass parked there as a joke or something else. I’ve done a lot of dumb things in life too, but I guarantee that I never ever parked in a blue man spot before I was in a wheelchair. I respect myself way to much to do some character killing act like that. The moment you park in a blue man illegally your character dies. I don’t make the rules, well actually I do, and once your character is dead you don’t get a redo.

Okay lets move on in the day. I go to the hospital and do some volunteer time. A young man (36 yrs old) came to Charlotte on vacation from Iowa to see a girl. He was shot on his 3rd day here and is now paralyzed. He has no insurance, his family is of very limited needs, and he has the hardest thing in the world on his plate to deal with. Alone. His family couldn’t afford to come out. I don’t know peoples history and don’t ask. My family would hitchhike (I would as well) to be there in a time of need like this, but not everyone has that relationship. I can’t imagine going thru that alone, in a foreign city, with almost no light at the end of the tunnel. He has to fly home alone next week even though he has never been on a plane before. The challenges some people are ginormous. Thank everything you can that you don’t know this level of hardship.

I finish there after a few hours and get home. Time to pay my registration. Nope can’t. The guy at the inspection place put my Ford Edge info on my paperwork and not my van. Mistakes happen. I call the place and have to drive back down. Pain the ass – YES, end of days – NOPE. I go to leave and there is FEDEX. Right on time. Multiple times a week I have to wait on FEDEX so I can leave or park. It is annoying to say the least. I get it he has a job to do, but park in front of someone else’s car. Just because I use a wheelchair doesn’t make my time less valuable. Sometimes it is really fucking hard to keep the smile many of you know me to have. He finally comes out, tells me how sorry he is, and moves his truck. I hate the “sorry” as he and I both know he is going to do it again tomorrow.

I arrive at the inspection spot around 2:20 PM. Guess who is still parked like an A-hole at Auto Zone?? I was honestly in disbelief. How can anyone park like that?? EVER. I need the extra room to open my door all the way. When this dipshit parks in between the two spots he makes them both useless. Taking one spot isn’t enough for this chubby chaser. No, he wants to block both blue man spots. People in wheelchairs are stupid and should not leave the house. We get the message tiny crap white car. I take my van into a very apologetic (I believe his apology) inspection service center and still do not mention the dead hooker they got rid of for me. Don’t ask, don’t tell. I do ask them about the white car at Auto Zone cause at this point it is clear this isn’t a one time deal. Here is the best part. It is the Auto Zone delivery vehicle. Unbelievable.

Correct paperwork in hand I finally head home to finish up my registration issues. Remember the Geico blog?? I do cause Geico sucks. Thankfully I had to pay ANOTHER $50 to North Carolina DOT. When I got my registration active before they charged me a $50 reinstatement fee. Get this. They charged me another $50 for restoration yesterday. Can’t even make this up. I called them and the lady laughed saying “Yeah they screw you”. We punish people that can’t afford things like car insurance by charging them more money. My situation wasn’t because I could not afford it, but it could have been. Poor people stay poor in America.

What a day. I have one more errand to run, but not to be outdone by FEDEX the UPS guy decides to block me in as well. “It’s only 5 minutes Bucky.” Nothing is 5 minutes. You and I both know it is 20 minutes. It is everyday. How would you react?? Would you be angry?? It is cool though, handicap people deserve to wait, and it is only 5 minutes. Don’t forget about Amazon delivery guy as well. I didn’t catch him yesterday, but I bet he did it too. I can’t dwell on it as it makes me angry all the time. It never ends.

There is a lot in the blog today. I ask that you pray for the man in the hospital. Even if you aren’t religious maybe just send some good vibes his way. He needs all the help the world can give. Take today to appreciate your life. You aren’t shot and paralyzed in a city 1,000 miles away from home with no money or true plan on how to navigate life now.

Be kind to one another. Just simply be kind to others. Not for them, but for your character. You will never regret it.

FknBucky

FknBucky shirts will be here next week. I’ll post photos and reach out to you that expressed interest before. They look great and I’m excited to get them out into the world!!

11
Mar
21

TV people suck.

These people are not real life. They are a bunch of over paid blank-heads that make money telling you how to think. Don’t fall it. They sit on top of their fake thrones pointing out the errors of everyone else while on TV for 12 minutes a day. Most of these elite somethingHOLES can’t find a true thought inside of their own head if you offered to double their salary. They say what they think people want to hear or what the media werewolves will let them get away with. Heaven forbid you have an original thought and decide to voice it. The PC police have serious power right now, but you’re too lazy/stupid to notice how it might be a problem. We will deserve the world we create. It isn’t funny that China/Russia/North Korea doesn’t have to do a damn thing. You’re willing to vote all your rights away simply because someone gets offended every 10 seconds.

Here is an actual thought for your over inflated self importance head. These offended, angry, and cancel everything mobs are NEVER going to stop. If they even take a pause they become irrelevant. They are a flesh eating bacteria of society. Every day they have keep eating, taking, and hating because whatever happened yesterday can’t scratch the itch today. Want to know how it stops?? Stand up to stupid. Say blank off when they come at you with this BS. I’m trying real hard to not leave the curse words. I’m editing them out, but you know my 4 letter words were flying out this AM. Maybe I’ll be canceled before I get started. Here is a ginormous thought that might hurt your tiny always offended mind. You can disagree with your friends. In fact it is healthy to do so. Your mind is a muscle and unless you use it, it will grow weaker. Sitting around a bunch of people that agree with everything you say makes you lazy and eventually stupid.

This is what happens with these TV people. They are their own little circle and if you step out of circle the firing squad is circular. They will all trample their own children running to a camera to be the first to call you a racist, homophobe, misogynist, or any other label they think will get them brownie points with the other morons on TV. They are just stopping people who say mean things Bucky. Really who gets to decide what we hate today??? Why don’t you goggle societies that canceled people, banned books, and stop people from being able to say whatever the heck they want. You want to put a pillow case over your head and scream about how much you hate people that look different than you?? Knock yourself out. I support your right to say whatever you want. I don’t have to listen to it. I am certainly not going to allow you to say it standing on my property, but I will defend your right to say it to the death.

Free speech means FREE SPEECH. Not sometimes free as long as I agree with everything you might say. We allowed a sitting president to be censored overnight and people cheered it. You allowed your personal feelings to control your actions while TV people backed up you up. Let’s go burn some witches cause that was agreed upon as well so it must have been the right thing to do. You’re an idiot, you’re a self entitled jerk, and you truly think your fellow Americans are complete buffoons that can’t be allowed real freedom because they are too stupid. Not worried?? If they can do that to the President (the office, not the man) imagine what they could do to you?? Me?? Any other person you care about. Trump is gone, but they won’t stop, they can’t stop. Don’t worry morons, random talking person on TV will let you know what you can believe and say to become a good little robot/citizen. Don’t rock the boat or you’ll be thrown overboard. To that I say “I’m fat and I float.” If you pansy asses can lift my fat ass then anchors away baby!! I don’t want to ride in your floating hellhole of intolerance, greed, and self righteous BS.

I disagree Bucky. White Supremacy is wrong. No shit. If it was a multiple choice question it would look like this:

White Supremacy is ______?

A. Wrong

Yep only one answer for that one. I wish it would go away and maybe someday it will be gone, but in the meantime as an American you’re free to be the biggest idiot in the world. You’re also free to disagree, not listen, and spend your Saturday across the street from his/her house with a sign that says White Power is bad. Defending someone’s right to say something does not equal you agreeing with the filth that may come out of their mouth. Remember this though – You don’t change peoples hearts by passing laws, canceling them, or by trying to “out hate” them. You want to change someones heart?? Go give them a hug and tell them you love them. Sit down and have a real conversation so they can see exactly how stupid their ignorant thoughts really are. The cancel culture will never tell you how to actually change things because they NEED you to hate or they no longer exist. For once in your lazy thinking life take a step back and look at the whole picture.

This Meghan broad has me all twisted up. I mean come on. Let’s take a quick look. Famous actress – Check; rich with money – Check; Marry a real life prince and become an actual princess – Check; and lets not forget cry to all TV people about how awful your life is. She just wants to be left alone Bucky. BS. You don’t marry the Prince of England if you want to stay out of the spotlight. How does anyone fall for this crap?? Someone (can’t say who) made a comment about what shade the baby might be. Cry me a river. In my family we would place bets on stuff like this. Think about how does this end?? You just went on TV telling billions that your in-laws are monsters.

That is not a good way to get invited back for Christmas dinner. We all know to go and sit down with baby shade guy/gal and have a conversation explaining why that is offensive to you is obviously not the right answer. Nope can’t get sympathy poor me points doing the intelligent thing, no freaking way are you going to miss the opportunity to tell Oprah how mean the world is to you. I hate this chick. She sucks. Talk about missing the mark completely. She had the opportunity to do so much being a person of color that just married into the British Royal Family, but actually fixing things doesn’t get the spotlight on you. I guarantee deep down Harry is like “Son of A…”, how did I get wrapped into this crap sandwich??

This is the best example of what I talk about almost daily. You can choose how you react to things in life. You can look for ways to be happy just as easily as you can find things to be angry, offended, and miserable about. No way Meghan was actually suicidal. She still has drug and alcohol abuse sympathy points to get (3-5 yrs from now) and lets not forget the divorce of the century in 8.3 years. You heard it here first. She has hit the lottery in life and this is how she reacts to it?? If this royal treatment is so difficult give it all up and work double shifts at IHOP to make ends meet. Guarantee that doesn’t happen.

So be kind to everyone. Definitely be kind to those you disagree with. No one can argue with kindness. Remember you aren’t doing it for them, you treat people with kindness for what it says about you as a person. Your character is more important than allowing yourself to be dragged down in the gutter arguing with people who don’t think like you. No you hold out a hand offering to pull them out of the mud and join you. It won’t happen overnight but eventually the gutter people will take notice and think I want to be up there with that kind SOB. Looks nice up there in no hate land.

Enjoy your life and spend time everyday helping others learn to enjoy their lives. And STOP letting the TV tell you how to think.

FknBucky

25
Feb
21

Round 2 Un-flippin-believable.

I think I have to stop writing. The world is just not working for me. I can’t make this stuff up and honestly who would want to. This day has been going awesome. I got a ton of work done this AM, had a fantastic Yoga session with Moonbeam (greatest yoga/life coach ever), and ate healthy all day cause FknBucky needs to lose some FknWeight. Yesterday I took a pretty hard fall which happens but not that often. It sucked and I had to let go of the anger immediately or I would be pissed off all day. Wow that is strong Bucky. Yep, not easy, but very necessary to live a happy life.

I have no idea why as my spasms are usually much more manageable in the afternoon, but today like a rogue wave in the Bering Sea my legs decided Ef You Bucky and went for it again. Luckily I went over backwards this time so I could use the back of my head on the concrete floor to soften my fall. Yeah that will and did leave a mark. I can only assume it happened again so I can write it up for you to read. I just don’t understand sometimes why everything has to go to level 10 with me. It is always that way and I just accept it, but damn some days it just plain sucks.

Luckily the screen on my IPAD PRO got smashed this time. Having nice things is weird to me so thankfully it is now cracked and broken. Not just the screen protector, but deep down the screen is dust. Keeping my awesome lucky streak alive I called around to see about getting my IPAD repaired and it will be at least $650. $650 I didn’t need to spend 15 minutes ago. Thanks leg spasms. You’re the best at making sure I never get ahead. This sucks a lot, but hey this is FknBucky and we make sure shit is really jacked up when we screw up. The screen and parts needed are indefinitely back ordered, my warranty time with Apple Care is past, and my only option is to buy a new IPAD. To replace this one with the same features is going to cost me $1,500 that again I didn’t have to spend 20 minutes ago. If I try to give myself the “let it go” speech right now there is a good chance I’ll beat myself to death with my broken IPad.

That isn’t true. I am literally allowing the anger and frustration melt away thru this keyboard right now. I haven’t fallen in a while so to have it happen two days in a row is baffling, but I can’t change it. Crying about it and feeling sorry for myself isn’t going to make it all better or allow me to go back in time and stop it from happening. I remind myself that it is only money. The bump on the back of my head could have been worse as a lot of people hit their heads and don’t wake up. I am refusing to let this ruin my day. I did plan to meet a friend at the dog bar, but I backed out of that plan simply because I need to shower and I’m not ready for the carnage that goes on there.

Whatever it is in your life I promise you can overcome it. No matter how badly you want to stay mad at that person you need to just let it go. That anger is robbing you of precious time not the person you are mad at. I am not going to let my leg spasms take control of my emotions and let them waste my time. There is no difference in what I should do today from yesterday. Letting it go immediately yesterday was the right thing to do and it is the right thing to do now. But it is two days in a row Bucky. Yep it sure was and that sucks. Giving more energy and time to the “fall” will not change a thing.

If letting go was easy I wouldn’t need to write a blog about it. I will get a new screen or IPad finding the money somewhere. Who really needs two kidneys? I mean really I’m just being greedy having a spare around. I’m sure after all the drinking and drugs I did in my past I can get $30-40 bucks for the left one. The right one and I go way back, we actually dated the same girl back in the day. There is a history there. Here is the end all deal. I will figure it out. I always do and today will be no different.

So let my fall be your teacher. Letting go is a skill and one that you have to practice or it doesn’t work.

I am going to tie myself down tomorrow as enough is enough. For the record I had a great blog idea before this happened. Guess it will have to wait for tomorrow.

Be kind to others.

FknBucky

23
Feb
21

Marriott No No

What a week. I’ve had so many little things irritate the crap out of me that I have a feeling two more and I will explode. Don’t believe me?? Just try. Be the one that puts me over the edge. This is actually not recommended. The world can be a Dick sometimes and it just makes you want to smash things. I know I said that you should not blast all your stuff out into internet land, but today I break all the rules. Want to know some really dumb stuff?? Cool cause I’m about to blow it up.

I travel a lot. It is my thing. I stay in hotels a lot. I stay in Marriott hotels a lot. I’m what they call a titanium member and have been for a number of years now. I stay at the same hotels many times and know the staff there personally. Some of you might even remember me posting things like the Asheville Courtyard Marriott decorating my room for my birthday and bringing out a cake. Say what you want, but the truth is people love my crazy ass. Some of you have known me since I was a teenager and not much has changed. I simply love to laugh and mess with people until they laugh too. I went to war in my head after getting paralyzed to make sure I didn’t lose that part about me. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone thru and can’t imagine anything else in life ever coming close to the darkness those days represented. You don’t know and I pray no one I care about ever truly knows the strength it took to not embrace that darkness.

Another day we can discuss that. Or not most likely as I don’t particularly like going back there. It is painful and scary to be honest. Feeling great yet?? Ha. You should be, if I can smile and laugh you sure as heck better be able to. With my status comes rewards from Marriott. They vary in what they are, but the two most common are vouchers for a free night up to a certain point total. Most of the times these vouchers are good for 40,000 points which is plenty to get a nice room just about anywhere. The higher end Marriotts can be all the way up to 120,000 points per night, but your local Courtyard is usually about 30,000. The other option are suite night awards. Instead of one free night you can get five nights upgraded to a suite for no additional cost. A very cool option for vacation when you have some loved ones with you.

Marriott gave me a choice on which one I wanted, but the email asking me went into my spam folder and I never saw it. They have also given me 10 suite night awards sometime last year I never asked for as well. Yahoo Marriott!! Thanks for the free stuff. Here comes the kicker. They do not have accessible suites in many of their hotels. My colleagues I travel with are mostly all titanium members as well and they get upgraded almost every stay to a suite or better room. I do not, because I need the accessible room. It is what it is. I use a wheelchair and in order to keep my sanity I accept things like this simply because to get upset by means I’ll be pissed off all the time. I don’t have that in me.

Last week I thought to myself “Self why don’t you email Marriott customer service and ask them to swap my suite nights for vouchers.” Seemed really logical to me as I can’t use the suite nights. I’ve tried in the past and every single time the hotel does not have accessible suites making it pointless. I explained that I am paralyzed from the chest down and because of that unable to stay in the suites of their hotels. I honestly don’t think I was asking for anything crazy, but simply asking to have my reward switched to something that I can actually take advantage of. The reality is it is BS they don’t have accessible suites in the hotels. I know us cripples make normal people uncomfortable so it is discouraged to leave the house and certainly not to try and stay in an upgraded room. Nope us cripples usually stay on the 1st floor next to the laundry room and elevators.

I was met with a massive NO WAY no matter who I talked to. I was kind of taken aback like “whoa” what did I do wrong?? I had one guy tell me other guests can’t change their rewards so I shouldn’t be able to change mine. I asked if all the other guest were paralyzed front the chest down to which he replied he treats everyone the same way. While that is a “thing” in my personal opinion it was being applied wrong. I explained to him/her that I understand the policy, but was hoping they could treat me like a person and not just Marriott member number 3938364 (not my real number). In life and business a person needs to understand that being right is sometimes the incorrect answer. I truly thought someone would say “Oh man, that is not cool” and then figure out a cool way to help me out. Instead I was left feeling ashamed I even dared to ask.

I obviously didn’t take my first three NO’s and quit so I started to email more and more people about my situation. I can afford the stupid rooms, but it became more about the principal than anything else. My final email back from someone started out thanking me for my loyalty to Marriott and how much they appreciate my position. I’m assuming they appreciate I’m paralyzed, but not exactly sure what that statement meant. This guy acknowledged the suites are not accessible, making it impossible for me to use the reward, but they still refuse to change the rewards and I should stop because it can not escalate further. Escalating is what I do. I’m hoping it is what you do too. I am fine with keeping the suite night award, but that should mean I have every opportunity to use my reward just like others.

Maybe I’m looking at this wrong and if you think that please let me know because the way I see it sucks. I love Marriott most of the time. In fact I have written a dozen complimentary emails with one of them leading to a group of employees at the Courtyard Marriott in Asheville, NC to be recognized nationally by Marriott receiving an award. They could use their award as it was cash I do believe. I really believe Marriott should be better than this. What do you think???

Be kind to others unless you’re Marriott. Then do whatever you want because you are massive and trading out one crippled pricks suite nights to free stay vouchers will bankrupt the whole company.

FknBucky

22
Feb
21

Time and Money

Monday. I was blessed to have family in town over the weekend. I love when any of my family comes to visit simply because life short, kids grow up super fast, and it is just nice to recharge with people you love. I am very lucky to have a ginormous awesome family that loves to laugh, eat great food, and enjoy the simple things in life. Mainly because we can’t afford the complicated things so we lie to each other saying this is what we actually want….

Okay that isn’t true. If you have caught on, one of the running themes or things that I repeat a lot is the value of time. It is our most precious currency. You can’t buy more of it, you can’t borrow some from another person, and the clock never stops ticking. I can guarantee you that it will run out. You like everyone else on Earth will run out of time. There are a lot of benefits to reminding ourselves often of this simple fact. You only have so much time. Once you understand this you can move to the next step of saying “I’m not wasting anymore” because wasting time is crazy town.

Compare time to actual cash for a moment here with me. You have $1,000 dollars and you will never get more than that. Would you give $100 to a stranger that disagrees with you about anything?? The keyboard warrior in you must win the argument on FB between you and the 2nd cousin of a guy you used to work with. Here you go Bryan (annoying 2nd cousin people are always named Bryan and they insist on spelling it with a Y) take my money that I’ll never get more of. Money well spent?? Seriously why waste the time and energy??

Now don’t forget poor me time. That is easily worth $250 in our time/money scenario we are currently discussing. How are people supposed to feel sorry for you if you don’t cry to anyone that will listen. Your problems are bigger and harder than everyone else’s so it makes sense to complain about them. Strong sarcasm there if you missed it. It is so important to reflect daily, weekly, and annually to realize exactly how much time you spend on this. I can’t imagine when standing at the pearly gates of Big Bang Theory anyone would say “Wow, I wish I had spent more time feeling sorry for myself.” Get up everyday like a champ with no snooze button, brush the crybaby crap off of you, and go make something happen for yourself. Sitting at home being a keyboard warrior waiting for the “great life stork” to bring you one is a bad plan. A really bad plan.

Let’s not forget the anger and “outrage” that comes up every time you check the news. How much time and money would like to spend freaking out on these things you can’t control?? Another $250?? Maybe only $200 here. I mean hey you got to hate the people that are out there hating. It is a scientific fact that the only thing that will stop hate is “good” hate and you are full of it!! By hating all day you have zero effect on you and those around you. When you are using good hate everyone is in a better mood. More sarcasm. Hate is hate and when you carry it around normal people can see it and they want no part of it. You know who wants to get a look at that hate filled sack on your back?? Other people with hate sacks weighing them down. There is no doubt you start to become the people you surround yourself with. Make sure the people in your circle know how to smile.

We haven’t gotten to actual happy times and over half your money is gone. Remember there are no redos and no ATM to get more when you are running out. Still think it isn’t important to take a moment to reflect on how your “money/time” are being spent?? When you get into a groove in life, each day mirrors the one prior, each week looks the same, and suddenly five years go by and that “groove” is a rut that has you sucked in. With no clue what to do at this point you simply hit the gas, spin the tires like mad, but still only end up in a deeper rut on the same damn road. That’s a bummer man.

How do I get out of the rut Bucky?? I want to spend my money on cool stuff. Good. Spend $300 finding ways to help others. Helping others in life is how you change your life around. I don’t know how or why it works that way, but it does. The more kindness you show, the more help and selfless acts you do for others, and staying away from the hate sack people (I personally love this term now and will use it often) will make your life more fulfilling and enjoyable. Easy way to prove me wrong. Do this for one month and then tell me I’m full of shit. I dare you!

Truthfully I don’t even know if the money analogy works in this blog, but I have no time to think of a new one today. Haha. See what I did there. Time is precious. That is the point. I write this as a reminder to myself more than anything. They say to best way to remember/learn something is to teach it. Whoever they are nailed that one. Although sometimes “they” say eat Taco Bell and that group of they are liars. Just kidding not really. I hate Taco Bell. There I said it. Now my hate sack has a Taco Bell sticker on it. Dang it.

Be kind to others.

FknBucky

19
Feb
21

OUTRAGE!!!

Okay. I have made a concentrated effort to avoid politics in this blog and trust me I will continue to do so forever and ever because it is truly pointless to bitch on this forum or any other. For all of my friends that constantly post political memes and articles on FB please don’t. It does nothing to further your cause or ideas. People pass over it rolling their eyes if they disagree and the only people that care are the same three friends that “like” all of your posts. I have a true purpose to say this and hopefully it will resonate with some of you because personally I’m so over the BS. I have to assume there are millions of other Americans that feel the same way.

What BS Bucky?? I’m glad you asked. Hang on, I’m going to type fast now. Not that it matters because you read at a second grade level. Little words okay. The fake outrage DAILY by everyone is stupid. Yep or dumb if stupid is to many syllables. It is never ending crap and completely unauthentic (going to have to get your kid to help you with that one) at its core. You aren’t outraged. You know what outrage is?? Tell you what, meet me at Walmart and I’ll have a perfect stranger walk up and smack your 4 year old kid for looking at candy bars because they have sugar in them. That feeling you get right before you go ape shit crazy, that is outrage. So if that is the actual feeling you get every time some media guy/gal takes a statement out of context and sprints to a microphone for a sound bite you got issues. It is simply red meat for the partisan crybabies waiting for their next hit of “gotcha.” Give it to me baby!! Make me mad TV.

So stop. Normal people are not that far apart from each other. STOP watching the crap news and talk to people in your neighborhood. How you going to let CNN tell you the neighbor across the street is a racist, homophobic, misogynistic prick for having a Trump sign in his yard?? Walk across the street and have a conversation with the guy/gal!! The thing is most people already do this, but that doesn’t drive ratings up so knock it off.

Personally I hate people. All of them. I don’t have time to hate a group for the color of their skin because that would take time away from hating the gays. Obviously when I’m not trying to get an 18 year old chubby girl to sleep with me, I hate women also. I haven’t talked to my sisters in years simply because they have a vagina. I should say I assume they do. Sometimes Shannon is a bigger dick than any man on the planet so, but I wouldn’t know because women are the enemy of my hate filled schedule. Do you have any idea how stupid all of that sounds??

Hello FOX NEWS. Tell me who to hate today. That AOC and her save the planet BS. How dare she??? Oh man, there they go, giving money away to lazy people don’t want to work. I don’t actually pay taxes, but if I did then I would super pissed. Stop using MY make believe money to help someone who needs it. You better be drug testing them all twice a day. Yeah I’m against wasting money on less fortunate bums, but I’m all for spending twice as much to drug test them in the chance we can catch one of these freeloaders with pot in their system. How dare Nancy Pelosi have ice cream in her freezer!? The good kind too. I’m so OUTRAGED. No you’re not. You’re a Dick that is easily manipulated.

You allow people you’ve never met tell you how to treat or feel about the people around you. That is just sad. I beg of you to simply take a step back, take a deep breath, and relax. There are a lot of amazing people in the world if you would just take the time to pay attention. Everyone is not going to think exactly as you do. That doesn’t make them wrong. They are a result of the experiences they had in life up until the point you meet them. You don’t know what people have been thru, witnessed, or what they are currently dealing with. So stop. Stop being a “yes person” for the fake outrage crowd that depends on you to blindly follow them because it gives them power. I stopped years ago as I’m as guilty as everyone else. It does nothing to further a conversation, bring people together, and nothing to work towards our common goal of making the world a better place for the young that will inherit this planet. Be a bridge builder, show your children what it is to be the bigger person (not Krispy Creme big person), and simply, kill those around you with kindness especially when they DON’T deserve it.

Just for today take a pause. Think about what you are actually doing sharing the latest ‘outrage” meme that will get 3 likes, one of them being from Cousin Suzanne that likes everything on FB three seconds after you post. We all have that person. Stop being miserable and stop trying to make others miserable over things that are out of your control. Control what you can starting with your attitude and how you treat others. Pay attention and talk to those in your community, get to know them, and if you still hate them then move. Life is to darn short to be angry all the time. It takes all of us to heal. It takes all of us to be the bigger person. It takes all of us to care enough about the future to sacrifice some of our pride today.

Do kind things expecting nothing in return. Happy Friday.

FknBucky




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