Posts Tagged ‘character

29
Apr
25

Debate is Good

By Bucktown 1 Comment
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My arms are worked this AM. I’ve done double workouts the last three days and when you skip leg day that adds up. I’m so committed to doing this darn pull up I might start wearing them again. If they put images of Jessica Alba on them instead of Superman, I bet more men would pull them up! Just saying. Okay let’s talk about something we aren’t supposed to talk about. How much your Mom hates you. Ha. I’m just kidding, I don’t want to talk about that, but trust me she does.

Take a joke Sally. I miss that word. This weekend I went to see a comic I enjoy, twice. You see I misread the ticket like an idiot and drove all the way to Spartanburg on Saturday for the show only to arrive to a completely empty arena. I thought “Bucky, this doesn’t look right” as I pulled into the empty parking lot. I pulled up Ticketmaster on my phone and sure enough the show was on Sunday. It had been about 3 hours since I had done something insanely stupid so I was definitely due. At least I got to drive my new Van so it wasn’t all bad.

On Sunday I got to the show and had an extra ticket. I bought them months ago and purchased the up close tickets with VIP access to the sound check. So glad I did this. I yelled out to the crowd waiting in front of the venue that I had a VIP ticket for the first person that wanted it. A lovely lady of 73 yrs young named Susan took me up on the offer. Turns out her son paid $130 for a fake ticket so she was SOL until I showed up. I gave her the extra one and felt good about myself. Sometimes being kind is really simple. I tell you this not to brag because I don’t need your compliments, I tell you only so that you might think about it next time an opportunity arrives for you to do something nice for a complete stranger. I’ll never see this woman again, but she will never forget me for all the right reasons. There is power in that.

Now the point of today’s blog. Greg Gutfeld is a TV show host on FOX news. I get it some of you hate FOX. I don’t care about that and relax for a moment because there was a very teachable moment for all of us here. On one of his shows “The Five” there are five people that sit around a table talking about different news worthy topics everyday. Usually there are 4 conservative leaning people with one liberal leaning person. One particular liberal named Jessica Tarlov is strong in her beliefs and is usually on the complete opposite side of political issues which makes her not so popular with the conservative audience of FOX. At the show Sunday Greg put up pictures of his co-hosts and talked about “insider” info on each of them. He put up a picture of Jessica and about 25% of the crowd booed loudly!

I was close to the stage, in fact I was only about 10 feet away from Greg when put this picture up, and anyone that watches the show knows the group of people around the table are all friends regardless of their political disagreements. WHAT BUCKY?? People who disagree about politics can be friends?? What is this crazy BS you talk?? Yeah friends can disagree about things. Back on topic. I could see in his face the disgust with those in the crowd that booed. He was visibly annoyed by it, and yelled “STOP THAT!” Immediately. I was so proud of him at that moment. He said “We don’t do that. We can be civil to the other side and NEVER shut down someone from expressing their viewpoint.”

He talked about if you are right or believe in your position on a topic, you should be able to defend it civilly with words. In fact debate is great, it is healthy, and it sharpens your argument which makes us all better. Shutting down someone from speaking is kid crap. Babies scream. Adults speak. If you have to shout someone down you already lose. Facts are facts. I don’t argue politics with my friends from the opposite of me because it has no purpose. I’m not going to say some remarkable thing to suddenly change their mind and they aren’t going to drop some crazy sentence to make me say “I was wrong all my life, thank you for posting that FB meme!!” We are who we are and you have nothing to be ashamed about. Be proud of you, but NEVER think you’re so right someone else doesn’t have the right to exist.

We don’t have to agree on everything to be friends. The world is going to be just fine regardless of what 24 hour BS news tells you. Mad crazy people are easier to control. Calm thinking rational people don’t make rash stupid decisions. Don’t be a mad crazy person. If your opinion is correct you should be able to express your viewpoint with a kind demeanor and listen to others without disrespect.

I had a great time at the show on Sunday and met some wonderful people. J and S (pictured above and full names withheld) let me sit next to them and we had tons to speak about before the show got going. They are amazing people that watched my stuff while I went to the restroom, I’m so glad I made the trip (twice), and thankful I got to meet all the wonderful people there. My overall point is simply don’t be the person who tries to shut down debate. Enjoy the show, have respect for everyone, and understand it is YOUR character that diminishes every time you scream BOO.

FknBucky

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09
Feb
25

Character and Leadership

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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The big game. Watching it now and just saw the interception by Hurts as a matter of fact. I was impressed by Barkley in the first quarter and wanted to write about it briefly. Maybe you will decide to read a bit for halftime….. Wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. I believe Saquon has about 7 yards so far which totally screws my bets up, but what are you going to do.

It was right after a questionable offensive pass interference call that went against the Eagles, stopped an awesome drive, and ruined a fourth down conversion. The fans booed, the coaches screamed, Tom Brady said “ I don’t agree with that”, and 50 million non Chiefs fans threw their hands up in the air screaming “SEE THE REFS ARE IN ON IT!!” Not Saquon though.

No he didn’t do that. I’ve been impressed with him all season by not playing late in games to pad stats, but would ride the pine to let the “young guys eat” as he calls it. Coming out of the game early to let some of the other players have a chance to enjoy the game they all love and have played their entire lives. That is character and no amount of money can buy it. You either have it or you suck at life.

I watched Barkley tell his teammates to “chill” and padded his arms at them to say relax it is one call in the game and there is A LOT of game left obviously. That is true leadership and it is awesome to see. That is what little kids should look up to. Not how many chains he has around his neck, how big his crib is, or how many flashy cars he has in the driveway. Those are all nice things to have, but don’t mean crap in the big scheme of things. When you are being lowered into the ground nobody is going to say “Good thing he/she had a bunch of cool cars.”

They are going to speak of your character, reliving stories of the random acts of kindness you committed, the next generation will talk about how you mentored them, shared wisdom with them, and took the time to make them better just because it is the right thing to do.

Be like Saquon.

FknBucky

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As always please like and comment. Comments help drive this blog to random other people. Let’s make the world better with words of encouragement and random acts of kindness.

20
Jun
21

Loss of a Brother

By Bucktown 1 Comment
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I’m trying not to puke or punch someone in the face. That is the text back I got when I asked someone about Ryan. I like everyone else am in complete disbelief. Never in a million years would I have thought something like this could happen. Not in Traer. Worst thing that usually happens is a bloody lip from a disagreement at a keg party. We are good old boys. Work hard play hard. Up at dawn, work all day, and then drink some Busch Light with the boys at night. Growing up, marriage, having kids and the responsibilities that come with those things takes away the beers with the boys time, but there is a brotherhood, a bond that gets created and once a member you are always a member. Time and distance do not cancel the membership.

Time goes by, stories get more colorful, the truth gets stretched a little further, our beer bellies get bigger each year, but the brotherhood never waivers. It doesn’t matter if I saw you last week or ten years ago we start up right where we left off. I chose to move away and haven’t lived in Traer for 20 years. Doesn’t matter I’m a lifetime member. Money can’t get you into this club, there is no leadership, and no real rules to follow except simply be a decent human. The biggest unwritten rule is when your friends come over to help you get a job done, you had better have plenty of Busch Light on ice in the cooler for when the tools get put away the beers start cracking open.

We lost a great brother the other night. I can’t think of a kinder man who could have been the face of our unofficial boys club. I met him long before I moved to Iowa. I remember he had a motorcycle when we were young and I thought that was so cool. Our Dads knew each other growing up so when we would visit Traer, we would sometimes stop at the Cooper farm. Dad and Jan would drink beer and reminisce while Ryan and I would stay under the radar doing what boys do. Cause a ruckus somewhere, but try not to get caught doing it.

Like all of us in life there are ups and downs. Ryan was not immune to the rollercoaster life, but he always had a smile and was a good friend to anyone that needed one. Like everyone else in Traer I’ve spent the last two days reliving the memories I have of him. I can’t remember a time where he was confrontational with anyone. He wasn’t weak but rather so easy going that there was never a need to embrace conflict. I’ve known a few people like this and it is special. I think that might this situation even harder to understand. How can someone so good at avoiding conflict have something like this happen in our small town?? The hardest part is knowing even if all the answers come it won’t bring our brother back. To say he will be missed is an extreme understatement.

We haven’t kept in touch the last few years, but for a while there we did SnapChat back and forth. Getting Snapchat’s from the cab of his semi truck while he hauled cattle always made me laugh. Ryan was blessed growing up in a family with a solid business helping keep them financially secure, but you wouldn’t know that to talk with him. He never presented himself better than anyone else and worked just as hard as the rest of the crew. I admired that quality as I’ve met plenty of men that sit back counting Daddy’s money as if they accomplished something.

I know that the Traer community along with the unofficial brotherhood there will step up and help his family get thru this. I can’t fathom what they must be going thru at this time. As my friend in the beginning of this blog said “I’m trying not to be sick” as this situation leaves me lost on what to do. I’ve traveled more than most, made friends from all over the globe, and appreciate them all. The bond that one makes with friends growing up is the strongest friendship bond there is. I’m no stranger to tragedy, but this one is so unnecessary and sudden that it is incredibly hard to accept.

Ryan Cooper will always be a member of the Busch Light Brotherhood (I know how cheesy that sounds, but I had to call it something) in Traer, Iowa. He will never be forgotten and the character I knew him to have will be honored. My heart is completely broken when I think of his boys having to continue growing up with only memories of their Dad. I know there are plenty of good men in Traer that will make sure they understand how great of a man their Dad was. It is times like this that I really dislike living so far from home, but my feelings of sadness and anger with this situation are like I never left. It hurts my heart and it sucks. Things like this aren’t supposed to happen to us. This is something you see in the news happening somewhere far away.

I know the community there will rise up to help his family because that is what small town Iowa does. My thoughts and prayers are with his family. I truly hope they get some answers and over time have some closure. There is no map to follow in a situation like this. You just have to get up everyday, do the best you can, and honor your loved one by living your best life. I have trouble expressing emotions in my real life, but I’ve found I can vent things out with writing. I’m so so so sorry this happened and my heart breaks for the entire Cooper family. The loss of a husband/life partner, a father, son, brother, and friend is such a tragedy. No one should have to go thru what they are, but the strength of that small Iowa farm town and the brotherhood Ryan was a member of will be there to help every step of the way.

RIP Ryan. You will never be forgotten and the memories we have of you will live on forever.

Tell people you care about “you love them” everyday. It is important. Don’t wait to chase your dreams.

WIth a very heavy broken heart,

FknBucky

27
Feb
21

Poop Bag Character

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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I am a student of life. I’m amazed at the behavior of people and wonder about how they can be so lazy when it comes to thinking of others above themselves. I witness dozens of interactions every week that could go so much better if people simply took a moment to see how they can make the world better with a simple action. I do my best to think about other people and actively look to find a way I can do something for them making the world a tiny bit better. You don’t have to be Oprah and give everyone a free car to do something life changing for a stranger.

The other day I took Annabel out for a long walk. I usually take about 5 poop bags with me. Trust me this puppy is healthy and like her human Dad completely full of shit. Ha. Figured I’d get a ahead of that one. No softballs here buddy. I don’t usually need that many, but I would rather have extra than not enough. Old lessons from living on the farm. Always take an extra one or two because the one time you need them, you’re going to be real glad you did. I usually bag up the Annie treasures and then leave them on a corner or place I know I’m coming back to. No need to carry a poop bag around. On the way home after doing our laps thru the neighborhood I can grab all the bags and put them into the trash can.

The trash can is a dog poop station if you will. A pole with a trash can and the top of it has poop bags for people that don’t bring one with them. I always take them with me from my home and refill at the drop off, but hey I’m smart. So this particular day I made my deposit and noticed there were no more bags for other people. Not my problem right?? I turned and started rolling away, but that voice in my head said “You can do better Bucky.” The voice was right and I could do better. I had two unused bags in my pocket. I turned around and put those two bags in the empty box so that the next two people would have a bag. I was able to help two random people, but more importantly I was able to help keep my environment clean of dog poop.

It took almost no effort from me, no one would know what I did (until I share it here), and it helped someone else be a responsible person and pick up after their dog. I share because it really is that easy to be a good person. I hope that you go out and actively LOOK for places to make a positive difference in your neighborhood. People see you doing good things and it is contagious. I need no praise or someone to say good job, but what does make me feel proud is when others follow my lead. That means I’m doing my job as a human. This reminds me of a time I was dropping the nephews off at the airport.

We were checking in at the main area when some how the box of luggage tags got knocked over and spilled everywhere. I didn’t do it so it wasn’t my problem. I mean they have people that work there so I could just ignore it and go on with my life. Who cares if the line is super long and the guy behind the counter is doing all he can to move people thru faster. Now he has to pick up all these luggage tags while I watch. We both know that isn’t what happened. Actually my nephew set his bag down and started to pick them all up. Organizing them to go back into the box like they were supposed to and I could not have been prouder of that kid. Without prompting he simply did what was right and kind. Remember someone is always watching what actions you take. I hope you set a good example.

I have another person I used to know back in my snowboarding days that told me a story about how he found a wallet while out walking with his daughter. He bragged to me that it had a couple hundred dollars in it which he kept and then threw the wallet into a trash can. He justified his actions by saying the guy gave him a dirty look while he parked his car. I have no idea why this individual thought I would be impressed by his crap story. It makes me sad because this young lady is learning wrong and her Dad is a D-Bag thief. He had such an opportunity to show his daughter how to be the bigger person (if you believe dirty look story, which I do not), how to do the right thing, and let her experience the feeling a person gets when they do the right thing. If you don’t feel shame when keeping the wallet that makes me even sadder.

So don’t sit back and wait for this perfect moment to do something kind. Look for those moments. Seek them out, experience the feeling you get when doing something kind, and become addicted to that feeling. Trust me you are not that busy, you are not that important, and you are robbing yourself every day you put off doing the random acts of kindness. Like just about everything it isn’t only about you. By being lazy you are most likely robbing someone that looks up to you the lesson of being kind simply because it makes you a better person, a person of integrity, and a person of good character. Don’t rob kids of that lesson.

Do kind things. It really is that simple.

FknBucky

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