Posts Tagged ‘crap

07
May
25

Change

Hump day!! Que the camel. Those commercials are great. The first time I saw it I thought “this is stupid” and then I was bombarded with it 79 times a day for 3 years straight until I started to yell “HUUUMMMP DAAAY” in the office. We fear change no matter what it is, distrust the unknown, and simply accept what is normal EVEN if it isn’t good for us. Why Bucky? What did I tell you yesterday about asking me questions?? Don’t worry I already forgot too.

Fearing the unknown is in our DNA. We are programmed to just go with what we know. That is why advertisers spend BILLIONS of dollars every year to show you their product over and over again. Insurance agencies (I hate them), food, beer, and on and on do this because they know if they get you to buy just one time you are likely to simply choose their product the next time instead of trying something new. Every thing you do has been calculated, discussed, and agreed upon in a board room somewhere two years before you make that decision. Creepy huh.

I recently heard a quote that has stuck with me and I’m going to share it with you. For free. Don’t worry I don’t expect you to do anything with it. Heck I’m surprised you have spent 45 seconds reading this blog. Please do not panic I assure you that video of puppies licking windows will can be there when you be done getting more smarter by reading this. Yeah I wrote it that way on purpose. Ready for some mind blowing knowledge? “If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it.” Read it again.

When you accept something that means you are choosing it. I accept my salary. I accept my job. I accept my body. I accept my childrens behavior. That means you choose those things. No I don’t Bucky!! I want a better paying job, I want better health, I want my children to not act like a-holes…. You can say those things, but the facts are simple and everyone can see them. If you aren’t actively working to change the things in your life it proves you made the decision you like them the way they are. Yeah, I had to realize I was making crap decisions for myself too, but the revolution came once I had the epiphany that I held the power to improve EVERYTHING.

I just like this picture of Annie from yesterday so I added it. Back to actual blog now….

A simple 15 minute workout. Reading a book for an hour at night instead of watching a Criminal Minds rerun (love that show) for the 9th time. Putting the beer down and spending time with kids doing something constructive instead of leaving them to fend for themselves until bedtime. I’m not a parent, but it doesn’t take a genius to know kids just want you to pay attention to them and will do whatever it takes to get time from you. Why not make it positive is all I’m saying?

If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it. I know you didn’t read it again like I told you so I decided to write it again. It is cool the more I write it the more I will follow my own advice. I write for me and simply decide to share with you. I choose to lead by example in everything I do. I’m most accountable to myself and believe you should do the same. Stop worrying about what other people think because they don’t give a crap about you. In fact they want you to suck. It makes them feel better about their crap decisions. The best thing you can do to get back at anyone that ever doubted you is to succeed and become amazing! I promise that will never happen if you don’t start doing something different.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

13
Feb
25

a poo story

Imagine you get up at 5:40 AM, eat some quick fruit, do some exercise with dumb bells, a bit of yoga, and then after a few more bites of fruit take your bestie out for a morning walk. The world is very wet from 24 hours of rain the day before, but at least it isn’t falling from the sky. My fur coat wearing friend takes off running for the park area only pausing at each drive way to see if I’m going to yell or let her go full speed today. It was a full speed kind of morning.

I only throw the frisbee for a good 10-15 minutes because my receiver has had a bum leg for the last few days and today was the first day back in action. I’m stoked. Feeling great to have so much accomplished and the day has barely even started. My spasms have been SO MUCH BETTER since getting the kidney out in July allowing me to actually exercise and have a life again. More on that some other day.

I see Annie drop some treasures by the mailboxes and like I do every single time, I make my way over to pick it up. I am obsessed with picking up after my dog simply because I can’t stand other people that don’t. I don’t want to be a hypocrite so wheelchair be damned, I’ll get that poo. I’ve fallen more times than I’d like to admit, but luckily that didn’t happen today. Nope I did not fall out of my chair picking up dog poo.

I did however roll thru some other persons dog poo getting to my dogs poo. I didn’t realize it of course until it was all over my wheels, then my sweatshirt, my gloves, and finally the rest of my clothes. If your windows rattled in NC this AM it was probably me yelling “Oh darn”. I’m pretty sure I saw some children start crying at my “darns”. Children know more curse words than I do.

I was pissed. I started to yell at Annie even though it wasn’t her fault. I stopped and realized I was allowing something stupid to mess my day up. What is the point?? The person who left the literal crap behind didn’t care I was mad. They will most likely never know cause they suck. Karma should kill them. Soon I hope. I stopped being mad, but never said I wasn’t holding a grudge.

I went home, stripped down (let that image soak in), got into the shower, pulled my wheels in and scrubbed them down, dried everything off, and in about an hour was all cleaned up. It took longer than just swapping shoes like most people if they step in some dog poo, but my life carried on just fine. I thought of the monk carrying the woman and decided to leave that shit where it belonged. Behind those mailboxes three blocks away.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

07
Feb
25

EASY COME EASY GO

FRIDAY!! Well for most of us anyway. When I used to snowboard all the time Monday was my Friday, but who cares about that. I recently wrote about gambling and it seems I’m not the only one in this country that has that app on my phone. I have seen so many YouTube videos of steamers and others yelling about how awesome it is to bet it all Plinko balls, slots, blackjack, or put everything you own on black. Let me be very clear about something. That is not awesome and it is absolutely incredibly stupid.

You want to gamble then do it, but…. Learn to gamble on yourself. Make yourself better, read the books, talk to successful people (not only about money), give back by volunteering and helping others, and just concentrate on being a better person. Then your life will double in value. Just like when the roulette wheel stops on Black.

There are lots of sayings that are from forever ago and nobody remembers where they came from. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater is one. WTF does that even mean?? Did someone accidentally throw a baby away one day?? I can think of a few adults I wish would have been…. Just kidding. It is WAY more than a few. Here is one that is way more applicable to today’s message.

Easy come Easy go. Pretty simple. I saw a video of someone that gambled 10K on a roulette table. They won in the video. Good for them. I thought about how hard I work to earn that amount of money and the thought of putting it at such stupid risk made my hands sweat. Now if one of you handed me $10,000 and said “do whatever you want”, I’d have no problem throwing that down on black. I’d scream “LET IT RIDE” if I won because there is no attachment to that money.

Here is the point. When you work for something you take care of it so when in doubt work on yourself. The more you do that the more value you will place on yourself. The more you cherish yourself the more others will begin to cherish you. Things worth having are not easily attained and take hard work. Why not make yourself one of those things?? Get smarter, get stronger, get in shape, be kind to others, volunteer, and if you find a baby laying outside in some bathwater please remember. Someone threw it out for a reason.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

28
Feb
21

You Hungry??

I just got an order of groceries dropped off at my door. Pretty amazing. I go onto the website pick the items I want and two hours later there is a knock at the door. When I open the door there is no person just bags of food. I actually don’t mind going to the grocery store, but it is much more convenient to have someone else do it and drop it off. I have been blessed in my life to be able to afford food. Not a day or meal goes by that I don’t say a small message of thank you. It wasn’t always that way I’ve been hungry before with no options to fix it. It is a brutal thing being hungry. I’m not talking about the funny kind you have cause no women are home to make you a sandwich, but the real kind when your insides feel like they are starting to eat each other. The physical torment is bad enough, but the mental aspect of feeling less than, feeling neglected by a world, and simply wondering if it will ever change is unbearable. If I had one wish it would be that no one ever feels that way again.

I have heard many people express feelings about God and say how could a God let so many go hungry?? I have often wondered such a thing, but I heard a preacher say one time. Why are people hungry?? Is there not enough food on the planet to feed them all?? That statement resonated with me. There is more than enough food produced in the world to feed everyone, but yet many go without. Why is that??? How is it so hard for neighbors to get along that one of them might actually go hungry while the other finds new ways to waste the extra they have??? I don’t lay blame on any one person or thing when it comes to this. My opinion is simply there hasn’t been enough people asking the question “Why are there still hungry people??” Some of these people make life choices that put them in the hungry category. Choices have consequences so make good ones.

I will make this promise though. If anyone asked me to buy them groceries I would stop whatever I am doing and go buy them food immediately. No questions asked and no need to thank me or promise to repay. I will not give you cash. If my money is going to be spent on booze and drugs I’m going to do them. Alright back on topic. Going to sleep every night with food in my belly is my reward and every person should know that feeling daily. Kids should never go hungry. There were times in my childhood that I just didn’t know when I was going to eat again. I was never in real danger of dying of hunger, but even going a couple days without food sucks. I could have asked for food, but I was way to proud. Pride is a very tall wall to get over sometimes. No kid should be hungry, but I tell you what the kids that know this feeling grow up grateful. If you have never been real hungry in your life I don’t know how you can understand gratitude.

A friend of mine back in my snowboarding days would talk of his Uncle. At least I think it was his Uncle. We smoked a lot of pot back then and it might have been his neighbors cat he was always bitching about, but whatever we talking about hunger today. His Uncle would welcome people in and always ask them if they are hungry?? If they are warm??? Are they good??? If the answers to these questions were yes he would say “Good you have all you need in life.” I love it. That freaking cat was smart. When is the last time you checked if someone had enough food in their stomach?? If they were warm and safe?? Probably never. Still think it is God’s fault people are hungry??

We do a lot as a country. We have literally millions of tons of food donated every year by Americans to help stop the hunger world wide. If you aren’t proud of that, next time take three extra minutes to buy a couple extra progreso soups to put in the donation box so you can feel good about yourself. It is a start and that is all we can ask for. Imagine if every man and woman in America donated two cans of soup. Hungry people everywhere would learn to hate progreso soup so maybe throw some Mac and cheese in the box once in a while. Yes it has to be Kraft. The other kinds suck. What kind of monster donates store brand Mac and cheese??

I finally was able to go a couple days keeping my fat ass planted in my chair so I can talk about something other than flopping around on the floor for an hour. I still think that was a message I was supposed to address and honestly I did learn or remind myself that hardships in life can come two days in a row. There is no time frame for crap to come. Can you imagine half way over the “not fair Gods” intervene and stop me from falling backwards while yelling “We got him yesterday!! He isn’t due for another 48 hours!”. Hahaha. Followed by “Hey one of you ladies make him a sandwich. He looks hungry!” I literally laughed out loud at my own joke there. Relax everyone this blog is an ”offended free zone“ which means crack a smile, appreciate what you have daily, and learn to come up with witty comebacks. It is more fun than being pissed off all the time. Oh and put some mayo on my sandwich.

This subject has been on my mind for a couple of days. I heard the God thing about allowing people to be hungry. I don’t know how you feel about God as in “Is there one??”, but I do know there is always two sides to any situation. Yes we as Americans have way more than many many people around the globe. I don’t feel even a little bit guilty about it. It is pretty simple that because we have SO MUCH we are able to do what no other country can. Give. A LOT. Americans are very very generous and without us having so much imagine what the world would look like. If America and Americans had less that doesn’t automatically mean the places that need it would have more. That is not how it works. So be thankful for what you have, more thankful you have enough to share, and pray to Big Bang Theory that never changes.

Be kind to others every single day. Find ways to make the world better. Remember it all starts with you. You alone can’t stop global hunger, but you can make sure the family down the block has food in their fridge.

I appreciate you all,

FknBucky

24
Feb
21

Falling down

I wasn’t planning to write this AM, but I want to get this out while still very fresh. You can see in the picture that I’m a crappy housekeeper. I just leave my mess until the clean house fairy shows up usually dressed like a family member or Vern & Lori. Love those fairies. Okay not true well not all the way true anyway. Nope I got up this AM just like you ready to tackle the day and get started. I usually check work emails first thing to make sure there is nothing being held up by me. The medical equipment can be life or death in a sense and almost always needed sooner not later. Easy enough right. First of all I reached down to the floor to get my charger cable which caused a large spasm in my leg kicking the table spilling my just opened Red Bull all over everything on the table. Awesome. Love that.

After cleaning that up I get back to email land. My body needing attention this AM decides it can do better. One ginormous spasm to make sure the job gets done. I could not fall backwards because of the card table so somehow I spasmed sideways taking the table, chair, and everything with me. The picture today is the carnage that was left behind. The concrete floors are awesome for rolling on, but suck for traction when trying to plant my feet and lift my fat Ass up into my chair. You can’t imagine the flood of emotions when this crap happens. Anger is a given, but the shame and sadness are the hurtful ones. I made a mistake 19 years ago getting on that motorcycle and I pay for it every single moment of every single day of my life. I don’t believe the punishment fits the crime.

Laying down on the ground with no help coming is a situation I would rather avoid. These spasms are just pricks. To make things more fun I’m completely naked as I take a shower after checking morning emails. Laying on the floor I simply think “this isn’t fair”, I’m a happy positive thinker so why does this happen to me?? Who knows. My ankles are vulnerable and I have to be extremely careful how I drag myself around to get back into the chair. Years of scrapping the skin off of them has left the skin weak and easily damaged when things like this happen. I really dislike laying on the floor with zero good options to get back into my chair.

I had to use my brain and Macgyver the crap out of my world to get back on track. I used the package to get a few inches off the floor allowing my legs to stay in the right position enabling me to set up the next lift. Look closely you can see my but imprint on the box. After trying several times I finally made it. No step was easy though. It was very hard and by the time I got back into my chair I was beyond angry. I don’t know the name of the emotion that was running thru my body at that time. I will tell you though, this is the worst way to start a day. I would much rather crawl into bed and redo life tomorrow. That is not an option though.

I don’t share this story for sympathy. I don’t need it, if I wanted sympathy there are many people at the ready to give it to me. Helps nothing so I prefer to not go down that road. I share this so that you might be able to say “wow waking up without enough milk for my cereal is not that big a deal.” When you see me later smiling and telling jokes remember there is no point in crying to you or anyone about my morning fall. It just makes me look weak and I don’t like looking or sounding weak. I tell you this simply because it happened. This is real life and I want to be as honest as possible in what I share in my writing.

I got thru it today and I will get thru it tomorrow. Want to know why I get thru it?? Because I’m a badass. Not really. It is because of you. All of you. My friends and my family. I love, truly fucking love having those moments when we can’t stop laughing. I love the moments when I see life and hope return to a person I help while mentoring/volunteering. I can actually see hope enter a persons body and I promise you there is nothing more powerful or fulfilling than that. I love watching my nieces and nephews grow up into young adults and remember their little faces when Uncle Bucky was coming thru the front door. Now their faces are big, but they still light up when I come around. I love beautiful women of all shapes, sizes, colors, and they used to love me when I was young and good looking, but now I’m old and fat so I admire from afar. Still admire though. I love to travel and try new things any chance I get.

If was to spend anymore time crying about that fall today after I got back up in the chair and the ordeal was over I would have been wasting precious time. I did tell a couple people close to me as venting is something I have to do but other than that I let that BS go. See you later. Why in the F word would I want to carry that brick of anger around with me for the rest of the day, the rest of the week or even the rest of the year. It would accomplish absolutely nothing except hold me back from living my best life. Yeah it sucks, yeah it happened, but that is over now. Move on.

I wasn’t going to share this story. I talked myself out of it this afternoon, but getting ready for bed I realized it is exactly what I mean when I say you must not waste time. How many of my days I have left in my life was I going to commit to this accident??? I voted zero so that is what it got. Don’t feel sorry for me unless you’re female and insist on giving me a lap dance to cheer me up. I will be as sad as you want me… haha. Relax bra burners. I respect women and don’t think they are only here for lap dances. Someone has to make me a sandwich cause lap dances make me hungry. My sense of humor will never leave me. Don’t let others steal your laughter.

Be kind to others, when you fall down (literally and figuratively) get the F back up, and let it go immediately. With no poor me baggage you are free to run to the next happy time. Run fast and take others with you.

FknBucky

12
Feb
21

Pick It Up.

Yesterday we touched on stupid. Today we have stupid, lazy, entitled, jerk face people. I simply don’t get it. I’m glad I don’t understand otherwise I would be one of them. How do you look yourself in the mirror everyday knowing how big of a shit bag you really are. It doesn’t matter if you get away with it, it is a character thing and obviously you have NONE. If you are too lazy to pick up after your dog, do you even feed him/her??? Do you give them water or too lazy to do that as well???

This was just now on the sidewalk in front of my apartment complex. It is so disrespectful I barely have words to express it. I’m trying but in reality this is where violence is a much better choice. I want to grab this persons neck and shove their nose in the pile of dog shit until they get the message. PICK IT UP. I picked it because I’m a good human and to leave it wasn’t actually an option in my mind. There is a poop station 30 feet away with hundreds of bags and a trash bin to throw it away. There is no excuse except you are a self entitled asshole that deserves everything karma decides to do to you. There are no excuses and don’t even try saying I’m sorry when you get caught.

I think this should be a big deal with the city. I mean you can get a ticket for taking a whiz in public. Letting your furry best friend crap in the middle of a busy sidewalk and leaving it should get a night in jail. After you spend the night in jail with some awesome new friends you can spend 100 hours of community service walking around and picking up dog poop at the local dog parks.

I get it. Screw the rest of the world. Let that guy in the wheelchair roll thru it, the young family with a stroller cruise thru some shit, or maybe someone else walking their dog can step in it. You’re too good to pick up poop. Don’t get your little Prince/Princess hands dirty. I wish I knew where you lived so I could bring Annabel’s daily treasures by and smear it on your front door. It happens all the time people not picking up after their dog, but to leave it right in the middle of the sidewalk is a gigantic middle finger to the rest of the world. I’m usually a fan of such things, but this isn’t cool or sticking it to the man. It is a disrespectful FU to the rest of us little people simply trying to walk our dog around the block without getting dog shit stuck in my tire, on my clothes, and eventually all other the damn place.

One can only assume that you are the person driving slow in the left lane, you park in handicap spaces when driving your Grandmas car using the handicap placard thinking you made it in life, and you’re the guy that doesn’t take his turn buying a round of drinks. Keep lying to yourself thinking you are fooling the world and nobody sees the real crap leaving person you truly are. In the meantime I’ll keep picking up after my best friend leading by example and hoping the karma Gods forget about me and concentrate on having birds poop on your head every day.

Do random acts of kindness. The world and your life will be better for it.

FknBucky




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