Posts Tagged ‘enjoy

07
Nov
21

Fallen Leaves

As mentioned before I will ask anyone that knows anything to please talk with authorities. Ryan Cooper was one of the kindest humans to be on this planet and his time here was cut short by some horrible person. I have other adjectives, but won’t put them in print. He deserves justice and I truly believe those responsible will be found and punished.

I look at the world objectively I think. I see things and think about them, analyze movements, differences from one time to another. I have a few friends that I’ve made along the way that can read situations and people as if they have a huge blinking sign above them. I’m kind of good at this sort of thing, but the few friends I speak of don’t even know they have this gift. One of them is a friend from high school and none of you would believe me if I told you who it was. I am in awe of it.

It is fall. It is cold. There are leaves everywhere. The ground, the road, sidewalks, my patio, and simply everywhere. I took Annie for a walk this AM and looked at all the leaves on the ramp we take everyday to the neighborhood we walk in. I remembered playing with her last year when she was about 6 months old. She loved the leaves. They crackled and I threw them in the air like bubbles a small child would blow. She would chase them around jumping and playing like those leaves were the coolest thing ever. It was fun, innocent, and a memory I have now. I didn’t think much of it until I watched her run up that ramp for the 900th time today and pay no attention to those leaves. One year ago they were the greatest, now they are nothing.

It happens to all of us. Things that were a must have one day become trivial and needless the next. A certain set of legos, a pair of shoes, a car you just have to have. As we get older we experience less “new” in our lives. We allow it to happen and it starts out very slow. Growing up there are lots of news. New toys, new friends, new experiences, traveling, sex, relationships, clubs, bars, drugs, drinking, and the list can go on, but at some point things become the same. The same friends, the same relationship, the same bar, the same job. You drive the same route to work everyday passing the same yellow civic on their way to work at 7:45 AM.

I think people get bored. The adventure of life is gone. I fall into this trap. Maybe that is why I moved across the country to a state I’ve never been to before at 38 years old. I am addicted to the adventure of life. I want to see everything, talk to everyone, and understand every culture there is. I dream of sailing around the world, putting the anchor down in some place I’ve never heard of, and then making lifelong friends that live there. I can’t think of a better way to live. I would leave today if the opportunity presented itself. If you’re a female (at birth) and this sounds like send me a message and lets do some crazy shit. ha.

Some people thrive in a structured environment. I think I thrive in chaos. I love people and things that are unpredictable. The world isn’t filled with people like me, but with those that follow the rules and do what is normal from what I can tell. Truth is most people have the ”action” gene in them, but it gets drowned out by the sounds of Get a Job, Raise a Family, Pay your Taxes, and all the rest of the noise drilled into our heads as we grow up. I’m not sure what the point of this blog is, but I felt like writing about it. I guess it is just important to remember to throw some leaves in the air once in a while. Be unpredictable. Give someone you hate a $100 bill.

Don’t worship money or possessions as they mean nothing. Nice to have nice things, but you can’t appreciate them if you’ve never been without them. Live however you want as long as it doesn’t hurt others. I’m tired of people telling others what they should and shouldn’t do. Get out of the rut and do things that scare you. I learned how to bake an apple pie from scratch simply because I wanted to see if I could do it. Then I made sure that it is the greatest apple pie ever. I’m just like you and forget to enjoy the leaves of life from time to time, but I write this blog to remind all of us that they only thing holding you back from adventure is you.

I wish you all a wonderful Sunday. The best way to help yourself is to help others.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

17
Feb
21

Secret to Life.

Want to know the secret to life?? Make life fun for the people around you. Mess with people. You don’t have to be vicious or mean, but mess with their head a little bit. The first and most important step is to learn how to laugh at yourself. This is also a skill. Stop taking the “life” thing so seriously. No one gets out alive. You only get so much time. Here is the deal if you make an effort to make people in your inner circle feel good about themselves and laugh, your life improves. Now ready for the real mind blowing simplistic fact?? Imagine if everyone did that. If everyone on planet Earth could stop thinking about themselves and scheming on how to get more for ME the whole world could change overnight.

In the military the soldiers don’t fight for freedom back home, or for the right for some jerk to be able to burn the American flag, but for their brothers next to them. They put it all on the line for the guy/gal on their left and right. Freedom and flag burning jackhole are the results of this brotherhood and trust between those on the battlefield. When the bullets start flying they fight to keep the ones next to them safe and understand that those 2 people are doing the exact same thing. Together they are stronger and do not bend.

We don’t have any bullets flying at us or it doesn’t happen to often anyway, but we do have sour puss people in our lives that simply want to drag you and anyone else around them down into the poor me level. Don’t give in. It sucks down there. Say enjoy your trip into crybaby land, throw up some deuces, and be like peace out. Then avoid that crappy person for the rest of your life. Don’t worry they will find some other sucker to listen to the constant bitching, and together they can wallow around in the “world is too hard” mud together.

The world isn’t hard, you’re just a human that gets exactly what you deserve. You think negative, creating a basket full of crap thoughts, and then throw your negative seeds everywhere you go. Sooner or later that first negative seed starts to grow. And then another grows. And another. Pretty soon you have created a big fat negative forest that you live in. Of course you cry to anyone that will listen about how did this happen?? You freaking created it. That is what happened. You wanted the poor me sympathy from anyone who would willingly give it to you and then you just kept going. There is no one to blame but yourself and I’ll believe that until I’m killed by a gang of Chinese hookers at the age of 56 while out for a morning jog. Never ask a witch in the forest how you die. Lesson learned here the hard way.

Learn to smile. Learn to look at setbacks as learning opportunities. Learn to embrace others in your life warmly and leave your BS at the door. They don’t want to hear it. We all have stuff to deal with. You’re not special. I will gladly help anyone that needs it when I’m in a position to do so. You can ask anyone that knows me personally I am one of the first people call because they know I will help if possible and that I won’t hold back if I feel they need a kick in the ass. Don’t ask to borrow money. Chinese friends are expensive so I have no extra cash. The reason nobody likes you is because you don’t like yourself. It is sad and I wish it wasn’t the truth for so many, but when you have all this negative energy spewing out of you it is impossible to be happy alone because you suck.

So fix it and stop complaining about how you never catch a break all the time. The breaks are there. They always are, but when you are hell bent on crying about “poor me” those opportunities roll right on by to the next person ready to take advantage of them. Good things happening don’t come with a flashing light and hundred dollar bills raining from the sky which is what your lazy whining butt wants. No. They come in the shape of hard work, waking up everyday and getting after it, and believing in yourself. I can think of a dozen people I would like to tattoo this message on their chest, but I don’t waste my time anymore. If you aren’t willing to fix yourself, I’m not giving my energy to you. Nope, I say hello politely and then move on because my life is short and I’m going to take advantage of every opportunity I can identify. Wasting anytime in the crybaby mud hole isn’t for me.

So get after it. Smile A LOT. Help others. Go out of your way to help those that appreciate it, but always expect nothing in return. Expecting nothing means you can feel good about your deed and not have the let down thoughts like “I was sure person X would go on Facebook and tell everyone how great I am for helping.” If this is what you want stay home. You don’t get it. Simply put be happy you’re a good person inside and let that be enough because in the grand scheme of things this is the ONLY thing that truly matters.

Be kind to others and remember random acts of kindness make you a better person.

FknBucky

29
Jan
21

Pull your pants up

Okay it isn’t morning anymore, but I went back and forth on publishing this. I question how much I want to share about my personal shit, but in the end if I can help one person say “You know I could do better..” then it is completely worth it.

Friday morning. I’ve been up for a few hours already as my leg spasms have been brutal lately. They will literally kick nonstop until I get up. Worst alarm clock ever. The smile you see me with takes work. It is easy to be in a pissy mood or upset at things that are not perfect in life. It isn’t like I wake up, put my happy to be paralyzed pants on, and come out into the world to be an inspiration to you. Nope that is not how it works.

Usually my legs start kicking around 4 am. This followed by me rolling over 20 times praying I’ll find the perfect position to let me sleep another couple hours. It has been 18 years and that position is still a mystery to me, but I’m no quitter and still try every morning. Once I get angry enough I usually curse my legs, the bed, air, Obama, Trump, and anything else I can think of until I focus on Annabel. Then I have to use my nice voice or she thinks she is in trouble. Next time I train a dog I’m going to make yelling angry Bucky my normal voice and she will be in trouble when I start talking like a pansy.

I usually spend 10-15 minutes trying to get my pants on first thing in the day. My spasms make it extremely difficult as they fight me every inch. Annie also thinks my pants are the greatest tug of war partner ever. I mean my legs kick at her while she is fighting my pants so she is like game on!! It is funny cause I tell her no every time, but she always be back again. I guess she is no quitter either. My morning spasms are so strong that I have to back up next to a wall, my bed, or anything while putting pants on because they will spasm violently causing me to fall over backwards. This has happened more times than I can count. When I go over backwards I know my head is going to hit hard and then right after my paralyzed leg/knee comes down also hitting me square in the nose which freaking hurts. This creates next level anger and cursing. A kid once asked me how many swear words Murphy knew. I answered all of them.

I have my moment laying on the floor, then i figure out a plan to get back into my chair, and get it done. I don’t share this for sympathy or for anyone to say “oh poor Bucky” because that is not needed. I share for two reasons with the first being getting things out of my head. Once I tell someone or put it down on paper I can forget about whatever it is that has my panties all twisted up. The other reason is it is good for everyone to be reminded that your “stuff” is not all that bad. Whatever you have going on it can always be a 1,000 times worse. So enjoy your Friday. Enjoy your weekend. Most of all enjoy your life.

It is always a choice on how you approach the day. How you interact with other people is a choice which you get to make every single day. If you have been a negative asshole (You know who you are) your entire life the best thing is you can change TODAY. Boom just like that. Good things come to those that expect them. I’m not going to let something as trivial as putting my pants on ruin my day. That would be be stupid. How does that conversation go??

Person: “How you doing Bucky?”

Me: “Worst day ever. I had a hard time putting my pants on. My life sucks.”

Person: “Ahh okay. Well I got to go. Hope you get better.” Walks away muttering “Fucking weirdo.”

Just doing that there makes me able to see things for what they really are. Stupid little things that need to be forgotten the moment it is over. Not dragging that shit around with me all day. If you read the blog about anger you will get this reference. I take that anger brick about pants and I throw that bitch back. I’m blessed in the fact I have pants. I have a ton of them. High quality pants. I grew up poor on the farm with only 2 pairs of pants. Good pants for church and barn pants that were covered in shit all the time.

I am not willing to give up the good things I have in life because putting pants on is hard. It most likely isn’t pants in your life, but there is something that gets you daily. Choose to let it go instantly. Don’t let it grow roots or start attaching itself long term. Identify whatever that shit is and say okay that happened, but I’m moving on with a smile. Take this exact moment to do a random act of kindness for a stranger. You will forget about all the trivial shit in a heartbeat.

Do kind things. Always. Life will be instantly better.

FknBucky




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