Posts Tagged ‘fear

07
May
25

Change

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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Hump day!! Que the camel. Those commercials are great. The first time I saw it I thought “this is stupid” and then I was bombarded with it 79 times a day for 3 years straight until I started to yell “HUUUMMMP DAAAY” in the office. We fear change no matter what it is, distrust the unknown, and simply accept what is normal EVEN if it isn’t good for us. Why Bucky? What did I tell you yesterday about asking me questions?? Don’t worry I already forgot too.

Fearing the unknown is in our DNA. We are programmed to just go with what we know. That is why advertisers spend BILLIONS of dollars every year to show you their product over and over again. Insurance agencies (I hate them), food, beer, and on and on do this because they know if they get you to buy just one time you are likely to simply choose their product the next time instead of trying something new. Every thing you do has been calculated, discussed, and agreed upon in a board room somewhere two years before you make that decision. Creepy huh.

I recently heard a quote that has stuck with me and I’m going to share it with you. For free. Don’t worry I don’t expect you to do anything with it. Heck I’m surprised you have spent 45 seconds reading this blog. Please do not panic I assure you that video of puppies licking windows will can be there when you be done getting more smarter by reading this. Yeah I wrote it that way on purpose. Ready for some mind blowing knowledge? “If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it.” Read it again.

When you accept something that means you are choosing it. I accept my salary. I accept my job. I accept my body. I accept my childrens behavior. That means you choose those things. No I don’t Bucky!! I want a better paying job, I want better health, I want my children to not act like a-holes…. You can say those things, but the facts are simple and everyone can see them. If you aren’t actively working to change the things in your life it proves you made the decision you like them the way they are. Yeah, I had to realize I was making crap decisions for myself too, but the revolution came once I had the epiphany that I held the power to improve EVERYTHING.

I just like this picture of Annie from yesterday so I added it. Back to actual blog now….

A simple 15 minute workout. Reading a book for an hour at night instead of watching a Criminal Minds rerun (love that show) for the 9th time. Putting the beer down and spending time with kids doing something constructive instead of leaving them to fend for themselves until bedtime. I’m not a parent, but it doesn’t take a genius to know kids just want you to pay attention to them and will do whatever it takes to get time from you. Why not make it positive is all I’m saying?

If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it. I know you didn’t read it again like I told you so I decided to write it again. It is cool the more I write it the more I will follow my own advice. I write for me and simply decide to share with you. I choose to lead by example in everything I do. I’m most accountable to myself and believe you should do the same. Stop worrying about what other people think because they don’t give a crap about you. In fact they want you to suck. It makes them feel better about their crap decisions. The best thing you can do to get back at anyone that ever doubted you is to succeed and become amazing! I promise that will never happen if you don’t start doing something different.

FknBucky

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25
Jun
24

Going In

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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Hello my friends. I have been so busy trying to keep my life in order it has been difficult to find time to write on here. We have been recording podcasts the last week and I remind you I’ve only been out two weeks from my near death experience hospital time. My stupid arm is still numb and the shoulder hurts when I use it. Funny thing about being paralyzed. If one of my arms doesn’t work, I simply roll in circles which is an issue for me.

So in about two hours I will be arriving at the hospital to have my left kidney taken out. We’ve been together for 45 years. Longest relationship I’ve ever had, but like a few of my other ex’s that bitch has been trying to kill me. I’ve said in the past “It is time to cut the drama from my life”, but this is the first time it is literally happening. I’ve had surgeries before, but I’m truthful on here. I’m a little scared. This is the first time a major organ is being taken out. They tried to take my left nut about 15 years ago, but like the rest of me (minus this stupid wimp left kidney) it was too strong to quit and came back. My balls are awesome.

I gotta get dressed for this. I love you all. Thank you for all your support and well wishes. Looking forward to writing again soon. Please go to YouTube and watch the podcasts. Episode 24 is so funny. I love it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lo_0BeK2nYk

Take care of each other and let go of petty BS. Life is too short to carry anger around. Show love and forgiveness and you will have a happy experience on this beautiful planet. Travel. Enjoy. Smile. Talk to people that are different from you with an open mind.

FknBucky

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09
Aug
23

Hope

By Bucktown 2 Comments
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Time goes by so darn fast. A day here, a day there, a week, a month, and inevitably years.. I just like all of you allow myself to be fooled by the biggest genius I know. Me. If you don’t look up to yourself how can you expect anyone else to?? In this exact moment you still have time to change. I don’t know how much time you have, but as long as you’re alive there is always hope. Hope. Easy word to say, but sometimes when we need it the most, it becomes impossible to find. You look everywhere. In this spot and that spot, in this person and that person, ripping everything you know apart until you sit down out of breath and defeated. Funny and not funny, you had it the whole time. Inside of you. You simply forgot how turn it on.

How do I turn it on Bucky?? By believing in yourself. Confidence. Read the books. Take the classes. Find a mentor. Make yourself better. I write this “message” because I need to hear it. I need to be reminded. I haven’t posted in a long time. I’ve written a ton, but haven’t shared. I have to teach myself that I can get my point across in less than 1,200 words.

Turn your hope back on. Right now. Best way to create that spark is to give someone else hope. A hug. A compliment. A quick “I believe in you.” You are enough. The greatest thing about losing something is the fact you can find it.

FknBucky

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FknBucky the Podcast coming soon!! Listen in as I talk smack on EVERYONE, use the Bucky humor you know you love, and wrap it all up in a wisdom bow just for you.

03
Dec
21

Tragedy and Smiles

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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I want to share a story with you today. A very important one that I hope will open your eyes, your heart, and help motivate you to count your blessings instead of constantly wishing for more. There is a club that no one wants to join. There is no name for it, it has no leader, and it is guaranteed that all members wish they could unjoin. It is a club of tragedy. Accidents that change the body is the cost of membership. I became a member April 1st, 2002 and have been dealing with it every single day since. This isn’t my story though.

I volunteer because I am able to help and I know that. I offer my everything to the people I talk with at the rehab hospital. I will answer any questions no matter how personal, help with any equipment they may need or want to know about, and I’m happy to talk with family members that want to learn/understand how to best help the loved one that is going thru this physical nightmare. I’ve probably talked with at least few hundred confused/scared people over the years and I’m very proud of that.

Travis and Staci Hoyle gave me permission to use their real names in this blog. Travis was injured a couple months ago and is currently using a wheelchair. I want to express one thing here very strongly. It isn’t your business how it happened. Don’t ask. Ever. It is not okay. Don’t say I’m one of those people that just blurt it out. Travis will tell you if he wants to. Instead do something easy. Talk to him like you would without the chair. He is the same person today as he was 6 months ago. Bust his balls, call him ugly, give him a hard time about driving a Nissan, or whatever else you normally do.

The Hoyle’s have a tough road ahead. It isn’t impossible, but it is hard and they will need that 4 wheel drive of his F150, (it is actually a 2004 Nissan 4×4 Supercharged) to get thru it. “Travis made sure I corrected that.” I have no doubts that they will. This is a strong family from what I have seen. Leave your pity at home. Nobody needs that crap. Bring your happiness, smiles, never give up attitude, and instead of asking for details on what happened say ”I know you got this and I’m here if you need anything.”

I see strength, fear, and determination in Staci and Travis’s eyes. It is okay to have fear because everything is new and we fear what we don’t know. The strength they have has nothing to do with lifting weights. True strength is in a persons mind, it is strong to accept reality, it is strong to smile first thing in the morning and say I can do this, it is strong to remember you’re not the only one going thru this, and most importantly it is strong to acknowledge other people are hurting as well. Pity parties are stupid and worthless so have a strength party. Challenge everyone around you to use the strength God gave them to overcome this obstacle. Once again I will say I have no doubt they will overcome this, but friends and family have a HUGE role to play to make that happen.

Unfortunately bad things happen to great people all the time. It is unfair and makes me want to scream at nothing sometimes. 20 years of membership and yes sometimes I still have moments of extreme weakness and anger. The key is to not live there. Accept the emotions, work thru them naturally, and get back to living your best life. Avoid the ”what if” hole because it simply leads to depression, anger, and regrets. What if I didn’t go, what if I didn’t stop for coffee, what if I didn’t date her, what if what if, and more what if. That is pointless because no matter how much you torture yourself it will not ever change the outcome.

You don’t have to be Travis and Staci to use the advice above. Everyone has hardships in life, hardship plays no favorites, and facing it head on is the right course of action. There is a benefit for Travis on Sunday. I’m told the 300 available tickets sold out very quickly. Money is always welcome and helpful, but kind words and genuine caring is fuel for the fighting spirit alive inside of Travis and Staci. This is not an easy road, but once again it is not impossible. The only thing different is Travis got a lot shorter and won’t be running up any stairs for a while.

Remember as this battle goes on that smiles and laughter are okay. In fact they are a must. Focus on the things that make you smile. Watching your kids succeed at anything. Holding your partner in front of a fireplace on a rainy night. Laughing with your friends while telling old stories. One of my best friends growing up and I would always yell when Welcome Home (Sanitarium) by Metallica came on. It is a random thing, but after my accident while having a tough moment in life that song come over the radio. I was instantly transported back in time and smiled gratefully that I was still alive to enjoy that memory. It is okay to be happy while dealing with tragedy. To this day every time I hear this song, I’m instantly 19 years old again, yelling at the radio with my friends while drinking a Busch Light.

It is easy to find reasons to be unhappy, mean, and ungrateful. True strength is when you put all those aside and find one reason to smile. You only need one. Kids, wife, family, friends, pets, food in your stomach, warm place to sleep, and so on. You can choose to be happy in horrible situations. In life when we are forced into situations beyond our control it is important to concentrate on the one thing we always have control of. Your Attitude. It is easy to smile at the end of the trip, but more important to keep that smile and positive attitude going during the journey no matter how long it may be.

I hope everyone who reads this will share it. You never know who needs to hear the message above. If you can donate money please do and then share this message. If you can’t send money I only ask you share this message so others will see it and be able to help.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/257mk-help-travis-hoylespinal-cord-injury?member=14697887&utm_campaign=contacts-v2-invite-to-donate&utm_medium=sms&utm_source=twilio

Count your blessings. Be grateful for the people in your life. Truly grateful for them.

FknBucky

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We still need Justice for Ryan Cooper. Please come forward if you have any information. As Russell Crowe said in the Gladiator “We will have our vengeance, in this lifetime or the next.”

21
Apr
21

Respect One Another is the only way.

By Bucktown 1 Comment
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I have so much going on that I am having trouble finding time to write. I either try to slam something together or just don’t have the motivation. Maybe motivation isn’t the right word. I let my fingers type out the thoughts that are going thru my mind allowing me to vent certain things out or relay a message that I happen to be thinking about at the time I start to write. I have a lot of trouble commenting on the George Floyd matter because it is completely one sided. Either you agree 100% or you’re a racist bigot that should be killed. I’m not sure why there was a trial at all. They should have just dragged him out into the street and executed him in public. There was zero chance that verdict would come back any other way. Those jurors were scared for their lives and the lives of their families. I don’t blame them.

The mob got what the mob wanted. Now on to the next one. The thing about mobs is once they start getting their way they don’t stop. They get bigger, bolder, and sooner or later everyone realizes it is a problem. Well not really I mean history has taught us, the angry mobs never make poor decisions. Do not twist my words as I don’t give a shit about the cop who had his knee on Georges neck. I can’t for the life of me figure out what he was thinking or why he did that. I also don’t understand why George Floyd escalated that situation for 20 minutes and didn’t just sit down in the back of the cop car either. So many crap decisions were made that day and truthfully I wasn’t on the jury so I don’t have all the facts. I do know that a sitting Congresswoman made comments about being more confrontational if the verdict wasn’t guilty. Yeah I know. If you’re a Dem it is no big deal and if you’re a Repub then she should be censored. The President said it had to come back as guilty. I didn’t realize you and him were in court everyday.

It is a slippery slope. People of color have not always had any kind of “fairness” in the justice system, but every year we get better. If you don’t believe that then you’ve lost hope and we must blow the whole thing up. I see the world thru the eyes of optimism. It is sad to me to see so many pissed off people that think everything is against them for one reason or another. For any one of you I will trade this wheelchair for black or brown skin in a heartbeat. I have my own history and learning curve when it comes to race. I’ve always thought I was a pretty good person, but I had no clue about black struggles. I had my own struggles. White I got, privilege skipped me. I dare anyone tell me how “easy” of a road I’ve had.

You can’t DEMAND respect from the world. It simply doesn’t work that way. You can’t angry mob respect from the people you claim to want it from. Respect is given when it is received. Watching 22 year old white chicks screaming in the face of a black police officer calling him a “racist pig” is not going to make the world better. Maybe instead of running her big fat mouth she should sign up to become a police officer. Why don’t all of these protestors sign up and show the rest of us how easy it is??? The way that police are demonized in this current environment there will be a lot of openings. You couldn’t pay me enough to do that job. It is really easy to judge from the sidelines never putting your own ass on the line.

I told my brother I didn’t want to write about this because it is too emotional. After thinking about it I realized that is why I should write about it. There has to be a lot of changes made in this world before this problem will ever go away. There are two sides. Why on Earth would people who believe every cop in America is out to kill black people everyday, give them an opportunity to do just that by resisting arrest or not complying with an officers commands. As a parent why would you not tell your child to simply do as the police ask and then fight whatever it is in court. Becoming a martyr doesn’t help. You are dead. No coming back.

There are a lot of things we can do better in this country. There are also a lot of things we have gotten right overcoming the “old ways” of doing things. We will do better on this policing issues, but it has to come from both sides. Simply screaming at one side demanding they change will never get it done. The attacks on police and constant disrespect that is ignored by the media and politicians does nothing to help solve the problem. ***A moment of truth here.*** Pay attention to the next sentence. These people that benefit off of racial tension DON’T WANT to solve anything. They are only relevant if there is a problem. Problem goes away so does the fundraising, the angry mob willing to do your bidding, and the power they acquire while the world burns. There is no way they will willingly allow the flames to be put out. Regular people like you and me have to calm down, take emotion out of our thinking, and realize that we are all the same. Give respect and respect will be given.

I understand the hot button this issue is. No real change comes from allowing these assholes that benefit off of the chaos to manipulate us into hating each other. I say it all the time because it is true. Angry people are easier to control. Educated, calm, and people that think for themselves don’t fall for the fake outrage every three days.

Learn to Respect each other and that is when you see real change.

FknBucky

P.S. I don’t know what the solution is, but I do know hating each other is never going to give us one or even the opportunity for one. Everything is based on respect. If you give none you will get none. That is just the way it is.

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