Fuck the Tilted Kilt in Phoenix, AZ and the manager named Toby Aebersold. He is a worthless piece of shit and I will be pulling for him to be hit by a bus. I know some of you wish I wouldn’t hold back so much when I write this blog and just let my true feelings come through. One day I’ll learn to just let loose. You might wonder what would warrant such a targeted comment as usually I just find creative ways of telling everyone to piss off. Well wonder no more because I’m going to tell you. Then I want you to tell your friends. Yep all one of them.
Imagine a nice warm day in downtown Phoenix. The sun is shining, the birds is singing, and Murphy and I are out for a nice walk. I roll she walks. We play in a nice park for about 30 minutes with a frisbie and then Murph poops so I have a choice to make. Pick it up or get the hell out of there. Off we go. So what would a single man do on a Sunday afternoon while stuck in Phoenix?? You nailed it, head to the closest church and pray for forgiveness for writing this blog. Then I went to a pub that is known for cute girls in short skirts.
How can that be bad Bucky? It isn’t dumbass. We are mad at Toby so pay attention. What a stupid name. No wonder Kunta Kinte didn’t want it. So first of all this place is on the second story of a building and I don’t do stairs very well. At least not going up them; I can go down them in a hurry if need be, but its not pretty or recommended. Off subject, but I sit and wait for an elevator that never shows up. How fun is that you might ask?? It’s not.
So as this dumbass (ME) is waiting for an elevator that is never going to come a guy walking by tells me it doesn’t work and hasn’t for a long time. Thanks for putting a sign up Toby. How am I going to see the cute girls in short skirts now?? Good thing I’m resiliant because a lesser man would have given up right then and went to the Hooters across the street. Not this guy. Those chicks wear shorts and I was thinking skirts are better. Honesty is my best and really only quality.
So he shows me a way through an office building next door that has shares an outdoor patio with the Tilted Kilt. So Murphy and I finally make up to the front door. Ready for a cool drink and a good meal with some friendly service. My new friend Kirk and I head in and say our goodbye’s to each other as we decide to part ways. I don’t pick up strange men. Sicko what type of story did you think this was. A story filled with a hate crime that was this is.
So I sit at my little table with my beautiful girl Murphy. Murphy is black you see and sometimes that is frowned upon. I personally think it is bullshit, but we still live in a country where color makes a difference on how you are treated. I’m white and male so I get treated like shit as you’ll soon see. Before a cute girl in a short skirt can ever get to me a bouncer comes over and says I have to leave because of Murphy. I explain to him that she is a service dog and it’s all good.
You see I have all the paperwork necessary and have followed up to make sure I’m not breaking any laws. So I tell the bouncer who has a really long pony tail and looks like he stabbed himself with steroids twice a day for the last six years and he walks over to Toby. This is where things get interesting. I see them converse and then pony boy comes back over. He tells unless I’m blind I have to leave. That is bullshit and I explained they are breaking the law by telling me to do so. He then asks what does the dog do for me?? This is none of his fucking business which the laws clearly explain as well.
So he goes back to Toby who says once again “We have to leave”. I don’t care if I’ve had my dog since she was a puppy and trained her myself. I don’t care if she is only there to make me smile which is exactly what I told the state of California to get her certified. You want your dog to go with you, jump off a motorcycle at 70 miles an hour and hope for the best. I don’t recommend it though. I am paralyzed from the chest down and if I want to bring my very well behaved dog into your “pub” with a bunch of sluts serving drinks, that is exactly what I’m going to do.
I’ve checked the law and anytime I’m refused service because of the dog, that establishment is liable for damages. Having to roll across the street to Hooters cost me 20 minutes of drinking time and ruined my happy fucking mood for the rest of the day. My happy mood is priceless so I will be pursuing vigorously some sort of corrective action from the Tilted Kilt company.
So in closing enjoy your new job at Micky D’s Toby because I’m going to bitch until somebody at Tilted Kilt gets real tired of your dumbass being around.
Fknbucky
FknBucky 