kids | FknBucky

Posts Tagged ‘kids

May

Change

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: accept, Advertise, advice, amazing, best, book, change, crap, Day, decision, different, dog, fear, good, happy, Hump, job, kid, kids, panic, parent, positive, read, sad, Salary, think, Unknown

Hump day!! Que the camel. Those commercials are great. The first time I saw it I thought “this is stupid” and then I was bombarded with it 79 times a day for 3 years straight until I started to yell “HUUUMMMP DAAAY” in the office. We fear change no matter what it is, distrust the unknown, and simply accept what is normal EVEN if it isn’t good for us. Why Bucky? What did I tell you yesterday about asking me questions?? Don’t worry I already forgot too.

Fearing the unknown is in our DNA. We are programmed to just go with what we know. That is why advertisers spend BILLIONS of dollars every year to show you their product over and over again. Insurance agencies (I hate them), food, beer, and on and on do this because they know if they get you to buy just one time you are likely to simply choose their product the next time instead of trying something new. Every thing you do has been calculated, discussed, and agreed upon in a board room somewhere two years before you make that decision. Creepy huh.

I recently heard a quote that has stuck with me and I’m going to share it with you. For free. Don’t worry I don’t expect you to do anything with it. Heck I’m surprised you have spent 45 seconds reading this blog. Please do not panic I assure you that video of puppies licking windows will can be there when you be done getting more smarter by reading this. Yeah I wrote it that way on purpose. Ready for some mind blowing knowledge? “If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it.” Read it again.

When you accept something that means you are choosing it. I accept my salary. I accept my job. I accept my body. I accept my childrens behavior. That means you choose those things. No I don’t Bucky!! I want a better paying job, I want better health, I want my children to not act like a-holes…. You can say those things, but the facts are simple and everyone can see them. If you aren’t actively working to change the things in your life it proves you made the decision you like them the way they are. Yeah, I had to realize I was making crap decisions for myself too, but the revolution came once I had the epiphany that I held the power to improve EVERYTHING.

I just like this picture of Annie from yesterday so I added it. Back to actual blog now….

A simple 15 minute workout. Reading a book for an hour at night instead of watching a Criminal Minds rerun (love that show) for the 9th time. Putting the beer down and spending time with kids doing something constructive instead of leaving them to fend for themselves until bedtime. I’m not a parent, but it doesn’t take a genius to know kids just want you to pay attention to them and will do whatever it takes to get time from you. Why not make it positive is all I’m saying?

If you’re not changing it, you’re choosing it. I know you didn’t read it again like I told you so I decided to write it again. It is cool the more I write it the more I will follow my own advice. I write for me and simply decide to share with you. I choose to lead by example in everything I do. I’m most accountable to myself and believe you should do the same. Stop worrying about what other people think because they don’t give a crap about you. In fact they want you to suck. It makes them feel better about their crap decisions. The best thing you can do to get back at anyone that ever doubted you is to succeed and become amazing! I promise that will never happen if you don’t start doing something different.

FknBucky

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Jul

Squeeze those you Love

By Bucktown 4 Comments

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: anger, bad, cry, dog, early, fund, go, good, guarantee, happy, Hard, Hate, help, kids, Life, love, not fair, RIP, sad, short, try

Been too long since I’ve posted a blog. I’ve got about 10 typed up, but get sidetracked and don’t finish them. I am kind of busy, but not as busy as I like to think. Regardless of what I do, I always feel like it isn’t enough. I can give more, volunteer more, work more, mentor more, and just about everything more. It is a good/bad thing. I don’t feel satisfied or fulfilled very often, but I’m also driven to push on and keep chasing my goals/dreams. Sometimes life has a way of hitting the “reset” button and reminding us that the only important thing is spending time with people you care about.

I moved to Charlotte 7 years ago. I knew no one in this city. Verno (great friend from high school) was 1 hr away, but in the city I was alone. The guy I replaced (job) took me around for training my first week. I was living in a hotel because I hadn’t found an apartment yet. This guy and I went for beers one night when his brother (Eddie) joined us. We clicked right away and I was no longer without a friend in Charlotte. That same week they had a birthday party (the group photo is from that day) and invited me so I ended up meeting a great group of guys that like to have some beers and laugh just like me.

Eddie and Ed

Getting to know these guys I call my Married Friends (cause they are all single) was awesome. We went on a tubing trip up in the mountains drinking a lot and floating down a river. I got to know Eddie’s best friend Ed. You read that right. Ed had the same sense of humor as me and we had plenty of bad jokes to go around. I was invited to come up for poker night and went. Nobody’s home was accessible and we had stairs to navigate on the way inside. No problem early in the night. After poker was a different story. My friend Ed insisted on being the guy to help me down the stairs. A few moments later Ed and I were spooning each other in the mud with my chair rolling down a hill somewhere. Ed was a bad wheelchair helper after drinking.

Fast forward to another poker night in a different house. We ate wings, drank beers and played cards. When it was time to leave Ed wanted redemption. You know me. Lets party. There were two stairs, not seven, this time so I thought lets do this. A few moments later Ed and I were cuddling on the garage floor. Maybe he liked spooning me and this was all on purpose…. I fell slow and wasn’t hurt so it was just funny. My man Ed didn’t want the others to see cause they would bust his balls for another 5 months just like last time. He was determined to get me back in my chair on his own.

I’m fat now. I weigh more than I look like. Ed grabbed me around the waist/belly and LIFTED with all he had. He also squeezed me so hard I shit myself. I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone that part of the story. Ed thought I farted and the look on his face was the same as if someone punched him in the nose. He got a good deep whiff of the Busch Light poop that he had just squeezed out of me. I thought well that is one way to make sure he doesn’t volunteer for chair duty again…

We lost Ed. He passed away a week ago. I’d given any amount of money to have him dump me onto the floor again. I just found out today. It isn’t fair. He worked hard. Took care of his wife. Was a great father to his young kids. At the beach on vacation he fell and passed away in front of his family. The thought of it breaks my heart. When you travel and meet people like I do, it becomes easy to identify good people that are fun to be around. It made no difference how long it was since we last hung out, the moment we started talking and giving each other crap all that went away.

Ed is the only man on Earth to literally squeeze the shit out of me. I’m sure he will be remembered as a great father, great husband, great son, and great friend, but for me he will be remembered for the poop squeeze. I am sure he would want it that way. This news was my reset button. Tomorrow is not guaranteed no matter who you are, how much stuff you have, how much money you have, or any other measurement you want to bring up. Treat the people you come in contact with like it could be the last time. Be remembered for laughing, helping, loving, caring, being genuine, or my new personal favorite be remembered for squeezing the shit out of a cripple. Something tells me Ed is a on short list with that one.

This photo was taken 5 minutes before he passed. Your time here in this life is not guaranteed.

There is a GoFundMe page, link below, for his widow and kids. Please give what you can. Everyone I know can give something unless you decide to ignore others that need help. To me that is a character thing. Do what is right. My hope is to remind the people lucky enough to know Ed of how fun and funny he was. The world was better with him in it, and I truly know it is a little less bright without him. That said the memories live on forever. He is in our hearts, he is in our stories, and because of this Ed will never be forgotten.

I have an opinion on losing great people too soon or just in general. To miss someone means you had to spend time with them, get to know them, and appreciate them. To grieve for a loved one means you had the pleasure of knowing them well. The harder we grieve simply means we loved them a lot and we are blessed to have so many great memories with that loved one. Without love there is no grieving. Be proud you recognized the greatness in Ed and he felt the love from you everyday. Your love and time are the greatest gift you can give to another human. That is right. Read it again. The best gift you can give is free. Cost zero dollars.

My love and prayers to his family. There are a lot of people that will miss him dearly. I hope all of them remember Ed with happy funny stories because that is what he was. A happy funny guy.

FknBucky

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https://www.gofundme.com/f/ed-studer-memorial-fundraiser

Dec

Tragedy and Smiles

By Bucktown Leave a Comment

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: anger, attitude, benefit, brother, Chevy, church, cord, Dad, determine, dog, drive, family, fear, Ford, friends, fund, God, good, happy, Hate, health, injury, kids, kind, Life, love, Mom, motivation, new, para, raise, sad, sister, spinal, strength, stupid, try hard, wife, worthless

I want to share a story with you today. A very important one that I hope will open your eyes, your heart, and help motivate you to count your blessings instead of constantly wishing for more. There is a club that no one wants to join. There is no name for it, it has no leader, and it is guaranteed that all members wish they could unjoin. It is a club of tragedy. Accidents that change the body is the cost of membership. I became a member April 1st, 2002 and have been dealing with it every single day since. This isn’t my story though.

I volunteer because I am able to help and I know that. I offer my everything to the people I talk with at the rehab hospital. I will answer any questions no matter how personal, help with any equipment they may need or want to know about, and I’m happy to talk with family members that want to learn/understand how to best help the loved one that is going thru this physical nightmare. I’ve probably talked with at least few hundred confused/scared people over the years and I’m very proud of that.

Travis and Staci Hoyle gave me permission to use their real names in this blog. Travis was injured a couple months ago and is currently using a wheelchair. I want to express one thing here very strongly. It isn’t your business how it happened. Don’t ask. Ever. It is not okay. Don’t say I’m one of those people that just blurt it out. Travis will tell you if he wants to. Instead do something easy. Talk to him like you would without the chair. He is the same person today as he was 6 months ago. Bust his balls, call him ugly, give him a hard time about driving a Nissan, or whatever else you normally do.

The Hoyle’s have a tough road ahead. It isn’t impossible, but it is hard and they will need that 4 wheel drive of his F150, (it is actually a 2004 Nissan 4×4 Supercharged) to get thru it. “Travis made sure I corrected that.” I have no doubts that they will. This is a strong family from what I have seen. Leave your pity at home. Nobody needs that crap. Bring your happiness, smiles, never give up attitude, and instead of asking for details on what happened say ”I know you got this and I’m here if you need anything.”

I see strength, fear, and determination in Staci and Travis’s eyes. It is okay to have fear because everything is new and we fear what we don’t know. The strength they have has nothing to do with lifting weights. True strength is in a persons mind, it is strong to accept reality, it is strong to smile first thing in the morning and say I can do this, it is strong to remember you’re not the only one going thru this, and most importantly it is strong to acknowledge other people are hurting as well. Pity parties are stupid and worthless so have a strength party. Challenge everyone around you to use the strength God gave them to overcome this obstacle. Once again I will say I have no doubt they will overcome this, but friends and family have a HUGE role to play to make that happen.

Unfortunately bad things happen to great people all the time. It is unfair and makes me want to scream at nothing sometimes. 20 years of membership and yes sometimes I still have moments of extreme weakness and anger. The key is to not live there. Accept the emotions, work thru them naturally, and get back to living your best life. Avoid the ”what if” hole because it simply leads to depression, anger, and regrets. What if I didn’t go, what if I didn’t stop for coffee, what if I didn’t date her, what if what if, and more what if. That is pointless because no matter how much you torture yourself it will not ever change the outcome.

You don’t have to be Travis and Staci to use the advice above. Everyone has hardships in life, hardship plays no favorites, and facing it head on is the right course of action. There is a benefit for Travis on Sunday. I’m told the 300 available tickets sold out very quickly. Money is always welcome and helpful, but kind words and genuine caring is fuel for the fighting spirit alive inside of Travis and Staci. This is not an easy road, but once again it is not impossible. The only thing different is Travis got a lot shorter and won’t be running up any stairs for a while.

Remember as this battle goes on that smiles and laughter are okay. In fact they are a must. Focus on the things that make you smile. Watching your kids succeed at anything. Holding your partner in front of a fireplace on a rainy night. Laughing with your friends while telling old stories. One of my best friends growing up and I would always yell when Welcome Home (Sanitarium) by Metallica came on. It is a random thing, but after my accident while having a tough moment in life that song come over the radio. I was instantly transported back in time and smiled gratefully that I was still alive to enjoy that memory. It is okay to be happy while dealing with tragedy. To this day every time I hear this song, I’m instantly 19 years old again, yelling at the radio with my friends while drinking a Busch Light.

It is easy to find reasons to be unhappy, mean, and ungrateful. True strength is when you put all those aside and find one reason to smile. You only need one. Kids, wife, family, friends, pets, food in your stomach, warm place to sleep, and so on. You can choose to be happy in horrible situations. In life when we are forced into situations beyond our control it is important to concentrate on the one thing we always have control of. Your Attitude. It is easy to smile at the end of the trip, but more important to keep that smile and positive attitude going during the journey no matter how long it may be.

I hope everyone who reads this will share it. You never know who needs to hear the message above. If you can donate money please do and then share this message. If you can’t send money I only ask you share this message so others will see it and be able to help.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/257mk-help-travis-hoylespinal-cord-injury?member=14697887&utm_campaign=contacts-v2-invite-to-donate&utm_medium=sms&utm_source=twilio

Count your blessings. Be grateful for the people in your life. Truly grateful for them.

FknBucky

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We still need Justice for Ryan Cooper. Please come forward if you have any information. As Russell Crowe said in the Gladiator “We will have our vengeance, in this lifetime or the next.”

May

All about that Gummy Life

By Bucktown 1 Comment

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: agree, beer, cream, disagree, drink, Gummy, Hate, hot, ice, kids, Life, love, trolls, worms, yoga

A short blog this AM. The world is burning down all around us if you believe the panic peddlers. Thing is you can’t let that get to you. Same as the left vs right BS. It is not really a secret which way I tend to lean, but the reality is I believe the government is not the answer to every problem. We can disagree. It is okay with me if you want to be wrong. Ha. I’m old now. I used to be cool back in the day and to be honest I enjoyed it. I haven’t had a drink since New Years Eve 2020. That is almost a year and a half. It is longest I’ve gone since I was 13 I believe. Maybe even 8. I used to sip the foam off the old mans beers when I would get him one.

That is for me. In fact unless you are personally involved in my life you wouldn’t know anything about that. I quit for me and it isn’t anyone else’s business until now I suppose. I didn’t plan on sharing that 5 minutes ago, but feels right to do so. Maybe someone that reads this blog needs to know that it is okay. You can stop. I will write something up someday detailing all of this, but not today. If you or someone you know wants to talk about it with me please reach out. I will give anyone my time if they ask for it.

So gummies. You all know how much I enjoy having my nieces and nephews around. Kids in general. I just love hanging out with them and dropping little bits of wisdom on them from time to time. Funny I’ve wasted a lot of time in my life being wasted, but I never feel like time spent with kids could have been better spent some place else. Before my nephews came over a couple months ago I asked my sister what type of food or treats they enjoy so I could purchase them. You know that whole think of someone else thing I try to pound into your head. She simply said one word that changed my life. Gummies.

When I think of gummies the first thing that comes to mind is worms. Now when I was young our gummy worms doubled as fish lures. In fact I really think they might have been. We didn’t have a lot of money so lets just say I didn’t care for “gummies” all that much. Fast forward 30 years and holy smokes. The Gummy world has changed. Lifesavers makes Gummies!! Who knew?? The Trolli glow in the dark freaking sour gummy worms… Little piece of wormy heaven. What was the point of bringing up the no drinking FknBucky?? The sugar. I love sweets all of a sudden now that I don’t drink.

I had no idea. No one told me. There is a whole gummy section at the store! Everything is gummy. Only need Jack Link to come out with beef jerky flavored gummies. Think about it. Yeah that is gross. I’d probably buy them though. Yesterday I told you to eat all the ice cream and hate everyone like Chrissy Teigen. That woman is a bitch. I don’t find her attractive either. Not even kinda. No matter as now it is time to buy a bag of gummies and share with others.

Take the time to be kind to one another. We only have one life, one planet, and why spend it hating people you don’t know. Find common ground instead of drawing lines in the sand. It is easy to hate someone. It takes strength and character to love people we disagree with. Are you strong or weak?? Kind of a deep question for a blog about gummy worms huh??

I wrote this before I left for a hot yoga class this AM. Just got back from my first class since the world shut down and I feel AMAZING. Covid can suck it. I’m never stopping hot yoga again. I’ll blog about that tomorrow.

Find ways to love people you disagree with. That is true power.

FknBucky

Apr

Barry to the rescue!!

By Bucktown 1 Comment

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: Barry, Bernard, childrren, dog, Italy, kids, kind, monastery, Monk, mountain, pass, rescue, Saint, snow, Switzerland, treat, week

It is 3:52 AM right now and my leg spasms have decided I’ve had enough rest for Saturday night/Sunday morning. Frustrating, but it is what it is. I am really excited about researching for my “dog week” blog. A small bit of advice don’t google “Amazing bitch stories” when looking for heart warming female dog stories. I think I need to put some parental controls on my IPad. I also want to add that I’m very concerned about the human race. Some weird people out there. Dang. You ever want to feel good about yourself just google some stuff. I guess if it makes you happy and you’re not hurting anyone else knock yourself out, but this is America and I’m still free to make a weird face and say “That is screwed up”.

Character. It is everything. Who are you when no one is looking??? Do you tell the stranger at Walmart they just dropped $100 or do you pocket it??? Do you let the guy holding 3 items go in front of you in the check out line at the grocery store?? Do you give the homeless person at the stoplight food when you have some??? Nobody is there to say “good job” and you’re so kind. No gold star as my niece would say. She is so cute. I don’t remember what she did, but it was nice of her and she asked where was her “gold star”? I handed her a make believe star, she took it from me, and proudly stamped it on her chest. Kids are so awesome. I truly hope you take the time to get to know the ones in your life. Yeah even your own. Those overtime hours come at a price.

Dogs simply have character at birth. It is the greatest thing to have a dog love you. One it is easy to do as you only have to feed them, run them, and pet them once in a while. As humans we are so flawed. Can you imagine if the people in your life acted like dogs??? I mean you will have to sniff some butts, but a tennis ball becomes the only thing you need to have a perfect life. To this I say “show me the butts” that I am going to have to sniff. I gotta be honest it isn’t a deal breaker for me.

I read a story about a Saint Bernard named Barry that lived with monks in a monastery between Switzerland and Italy. I had to double check as I drove from Switzerland to Italy a few years back, but Mix and I didn’t take this path. Greatest road trip of my life. That is another blog though. This blog is all about Barry the super dog. The original Barry was a rescue dog in the early 1800’s. These amazing furry friends were trained to go out in pairs to find humans that lost their way in the snowy craziness. One of the dogs would stay with the lost human to keep them warm while the other ran back to get the human rescue team.

Our new best friend Barry is credited with saving 40 people over a span of 12 years. What have you done lately?? Thought so. Be better. The most famous rescue accredited to Barry was a small child that had gotten lost. A very tragic loss as the monks had children burgers on the menu that night. The child must be found was the chant those hungry monks would yell. I have no evidence of this, but the Main Stream Media (MSM) will run the story. The headline is ”Children eating monks have direct ties with the Trump family”. Okay no more cheap shots. Back to Barry.

Our super dog actually let the kid climb onto his (Barry was born a boy, but later in life identified as a non-binary evergreen tree) back as Barry crawled out of the dangerous situation. The rescue team was unable to get to the main course (dinner) so the only way out was carrying the kid to safety. We so don’t deserve dogs. They are born with character. They do the right thing simply because it is the right thing to do. What a noble concept.

Barry the rescue dog was so loved that a tradition was started of always having a dog named Barry on the team. I’m annoyed as I wrote the ending to this and was 2 seconds from publishing, but now I have to do it again. It didn’t SAVE. Problem is I don’t remember what I wrote. Something about dogs are awesome and humans are dirtbags. Well not all of them cause if you read my blog you are no longer a dirtbag. Or dumb. See you don’t need a four year degree! Just read the wisdom (crap) I write daily and you will be way smarter than your college educated friends.

This is dog week on my blog. It is like shark week, but with dogs. So be kind to a dog today. Take him/her/evergreen tree for an extra walk or throw an extra treat at them. Dogs are innocent, kind, and make life better. If you hurt them you are a special kind of awful and I can only hope that sooner or later you will face the consequences.

Be kind to each other, sniff a butt or two, and let a tennis ball make you happy.

FknBucky

Mar

Stupid Kids

By Bucktown Leave a Comment

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: action, better, dumb, example, finish, football, fulfill, gingers, human, kids, kind, lead, learn, Life, live, love, mistake, mistakes, pie, planet, right, soak, sponge, teach, words

Wednesday. Hump Day. Those darn car insurance mafia people have ruined hump day for me as well. I always think about that camel walking thru the office. I will gladly lead the rebellion when it is time that we all stand together against this common enemy. White, black, yellow, green, smart, stupid, guy, girl, oak tree, slutty people, not slutty people, tall people, short people, kind, mean, in between, and pretty much ANYONE on Earth except for the gingers. I do not want those soul stealing psychos on my revolution team. Dang it. I’ll take them only to keep them off Team Car Insurance and we get to put them in Joe Biden’s children cages until combat day. Oh come on, it is just one little dig on ya…. Funny the fake outrage people aren’t clamoring for TV time now. Tell me again how they aren’t manipulating assholes. Don’t fall for it. Damn I totally forgot what my point was today. I started writing planning to get around to something, but I can’t for the life of me remember what the hell it was right now. I blame a Ginger. One of you got to me!! ***I make fun of Gingers because it is funny and they have no souls***. Just in case you wondered.

Oh yeah now I got it. I have one of my nephews staying with me this week. Many of you that follow this blog know how much I enjoy being an Uncle and I take that role seriously. Read the “Eat Your Beans” blog as it is always a good one. Young men need to be taught and guided on how to be a man. Looking people in the eye when you shake their hand, speak with a purpose, think thru your actions before you start doing anything, and most importantly you get respect when you give it. Be kind, pay attention, and never let people treat you poorly regardless of the circumstance. Make good choices and realize that sometimes the right choice is the one that benefits you personally the least. The ME ME ME attitude that is so prevalent in this world is a social cancer. People need to learn the more you do for others the better your life will be, but this takes time and the instant gratification crew have no patience for that.

Having good character is more important long term than the instant feel good now things that puts other peoples feelings and needs second to yours. To have a fulfilling life you have to build a solid foundation of doing right by others everyday regardless of what is in it for you. Class is not only in session on the weekends, evenings, or when it is convenient for you. Nope. It is 24/7. Every hour of every day is the time to show young people what it is to be a person of substance. You don’t teach by lecturing when it comes to these lessons, you teach by doing. You want the young people in your life to be good humans then actively pursue being good yourself. They will follow and are soaking up everything you do like a sponge. Make sure they are soaking up the right stuff because that’s all you put out.

School can only do so much and truthfully if you are leaving the character of the young people in your life to be molded by public school then you‘ve already failed. I talk with my nephews like they are men simply because one day God willing they will be. When they do something dumb I point it out. Not to be mean, but the complete opposite. I want them to learn and do better. There are a lot of dumbass people on this planet simply because no one loved them enough to call out their BS early on. Teenagers are supposed to be stupid. It is what they are. It is up to grown folks to remind them constantly with the goal of beating every little bit of self confidence out of them. Ha. Obviously not true. Don’t just point out the mistake, take a moment to explain why certain words or actions are not the right way, and then show (not tell) them the correct path. Show them how to be better and how great life is when you put others ahead of yourself.

Kids pick up on things so let them learn by experience. Let them see the difference of walking into a room and not saying a word to the other people in that room vs walking into said room, introducing themselves to each person, looking them in the eye and shaking hands. I’m not a parent, but I will say this, when I take my nephews with me while working I get so many compliments on them for the simple thing of them introducing themselves correctly. That in itself must mean they‘re doing something right. It is never to early to start these life lessons. Simply ask yourself this question “Do I love the young people in my life enough to show them how to become a person of character or is it too much work??”

It doesn’t matter what task you do with kids it only matters you spend time with them. I can teach the same message while throwing a football in the backyard as I can baking an apple pie. None of these things are rocket science. Finish what you start. Don’t do things half assed. Be proud of your work and when you do something do it the best you can. No one is going to make fun of a boy that baked a pie if that pie is stupid awesome tasting. They will make fun of you playing catch if you miss the ball and it hits you in the face. At least I would.

Enjoy your life, lead by example, and simply find ways to be kind to others.

FknBucky

Jun

Learning to Fail

By Bucktown 2 Comments

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: color, control, Failure, good, gun, guns, happiness, Jessica Alba, kids, learn, learning, NRA, Obama, school, shooting

I wrote this blog, named it, and then typed the title into BING images. Apparently I’m not the only one with this thought…..

Obama is right. Not easy to say that, but something needs to be done about all the school shootings. It makes me sad that it happens almost every week for some reason and I’m laying in bed trying to figure what the hell is going on?? Plus I can’t sleep for some stupid reason. Insomnia sucks. I did just have a thought though and figured I’d share some of my wisdom… Jessica Alba is hot. Ha ha. Thats the only wise thing you’ll hear from me.

We are now seeing the “everyone gets a ribbon” generation all grown up. I think there is some good in it, and well who doesn’t want their little Timmy to be happy everyday??? Heres the problem sometimes no matter what you do, what you try, or what you say one day life is going to kick you in the nuts. It happens to every single person on the planet A LOT. Rich, poor, gay, straight, black, white, Mexican — EVERYONE. Wait.. When did Mexican become a color???

So what do you do when everything goes ka-poot?? Less swearing Mom. Check. Thats just it. When we take failure out of kids lives we rob them of the learning experience of how to deal with it. It is just as important as learning how to be a gracious winner, and in fact I believe even more important. Learning to fail is a skill that all great leaders, inventors, entrepreneurs LEARN in life. Look at Abraham Lincoln do you think he would have been the same leader at the time when a broken country needed him so badly had he not had those previous life experiences that taught him so much wisdom??? The best lessons are taught through/from failure so if you never learn how to fail, you miss out on a whole lot. Maybe we are seeing the results of that today. Just a thought..

I don’t have all the answers, but I know taking away the guns of people that didn’t do anything wrong isn’t a good one. I know that the mental problems of these kids are serious and need to be identified sooner or we need to find a way to stop creating these monsters. Parents want to “protect” their kids from all the bad, but sometimes we need shit to hit the fan. Just a little at first so you learn to cope with that, and then as you get older the shit gets thicker. It is going to happen. It just does. Drugs are not the answer either. These anti-depressants scare the crap out of me and many of these people that “snap” are on them. You can’t mess with emotions, but you can learn to control them and use them. All of them.

Just because you can’t get a girlfriend doesn’t mean you kill your 3 roommates with a knife and then go on a killing spree targeting sorority girls. What did this kid get taught growing up?? Think he earned that shiny BMW he was driving??? I’m not pointing the finger at his parents, I’m just sharing a thought. Maybe if he had learned to fail, he would have learned to pick himself back up becoming stronger in the process. You know the old saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

It is wonderful times we live in. I’d hate to think it any other way. We have computers, I-Pods, a better understanding of different cultures and each other than any other time in history. It just seems that maybe in our lets all have a charmed life attitude we are forgetting something. Bad happens. I don’t know why, but I do know the incredible lessons I’ve learned from those type of events happening in my life. I didn’t give up, I didn’t shoot 30 people and you want to know why??

It’s simple. My parents and family taught from day one to suck it up. That’s not PC Bucky. It’s not supposed to be. Learning to fail is just like every other skill one acquires in life. You have to practice it. You have to TRY to be able to fail so you are learning two things. Just don’t shelter your kids to much as it can’t be healthy. I see a theme in these kids that go nuts. They are wondering where their charmed life is, that was promised to them?? It isn’t reality. The world isn’t perfect and just because you’re here on planet Earth doesn’t mean you are going to fit in. Sometimes it isn’t easy either. You have to work at it.

You make your life charming. YOU make your life great. You. The sooner YOU learn this life lesson the sooner you will let the bad wash off you like water off a ducks back and focus on the good in the world/your life. Thus allowing you to fit into society and help make the world better, not make a headline for 3 days by senselessly hurting people you’ve never even met.

Fknbucky

Apr

The Day. 19 Years today

By Bucktown 2 Comments

Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: attitude, Colorado, Copper, cry, Denver, depression, drugs, go, happy, helicopter, kids, man, miracle, motor, motorcycle, pain, para, paralyzed, paraplegic, rich, scar, smile, stop, stregth, try, wish, woman

My physical scar is much smaller than the emotional ones I carry with me.

The only difference is now I sit down to smile.

I wrote this blog 9 years ago. It is just as relevant today as it was then. I’ve been paralyzed now for 19 years. It is hard, life is hard, and for one stupid decision I have a lifetime sentence. There is no parole, just more days guaranteed to be filled with pain, filled with depression, and filled with regrets. I make a conscious decision every day to not allow myself to go down this pain, depression, and regret highway. I don’t always succeed in stopping myself from spending time on this very lonely road which is never healthy, but it is always there begging me to come take the drive. It will let me go as fast as I want, no morons camping out in the left passing lane, and a plethora of other whiners waiting for me to start the ”Poor Me” conversation.

I could have easily died that day. Kind of a miracle I didn’t. Many of you wouldn’t have gotten to know me. So please read below. Take a moment to put yourself in my shoes. Please share it if you think others might benefit from reading this message.

April 1st 2002. I was paralyzed in a motorcycle accident at 1:32 PM riding home from snowboarding at Copper Mountain. I should not have been on a motorcycle that day, but I did it anyway. My inner voice that I usually listen to was drowned out by my ego and irresponsibility. I accept the outcomes of the choices I make because I’m an adult, a man, and a person that believes it is the only option. Those that spend their days finding ways to blame others for their problems are only wasting time.

I was in the median of the freeway and I saw the oncoming traffic and thought to myself “this is how I am going to die.” I accepted it and was strangely not afraid. I have never really had a fear of being dead, but I don’t want to die early, I just accept what happens. Then I was in the air. Flying & flipping head over heels. I was told later by a witness I did three full flips, but obviously I didn’t stick the landing. My head hit first and I broke the helmet that was saving my life. I believe the helmet pushed into my spine and smashed it.

I was awake the entire time and remember every detail. It was the hardest moment of my life to date. I knew I was paralyzed and I was scared. My feet and legs were point up, but my chest & head were twisted around. I had to take my arm and push against the ground to make my body look “normal” again. That was scary as well. A man from Africa got to me first. He didn’t speak English, but just looked at me. He tried to take my helmet off, but I told him not to with hand gestures. A woman ran up to me and held my hand, while her husband parked the car. While he was running over to me I could hear him say “Is he breathing.”

Then another woman showed up and held my other hand and proceeded to tell me that “she loved me”. This is when I started to think I was dying. That is what you say to people that are dying, and it started to freak me out. The first woman saw this and told her to stop, but the 2nd woman argued back that I needed to hear it. I was laying in the median of a freeway freshly paralyzed and still had women fighting over me. It is the cross I bear…

An ambulance came and took me to a hospital. What happened in that hospital was the scariest, hardest, and worst hour I can think of. The questions and answers are something I wish I could forget. You don’t need to know those details. I was then taken by a helicopter to Denver where I was in critical condition for a few days. I told the lady on the helicopter to give me some serious drugs because I didn’t want to be there right then. I said “I’ll deal with the rest of this tomorrow.” She did.

Every time someone asks me why I’m in a wheelchair, this is what runs through my mind. Still think it isn’t rude to ask somebody that question. I get asked by complete strangers multiple times in a day sometimes. Make sure your kids know better. It was ten years ago and my life has changed substantially. My views of the world, the government, and the way I represent myself. Being in the hospital was like attending my own funeral. People came from everywhere just to stand in that room to say nothing while saying everything. They came to stand there and say “I care about you Bucky”. This saved my life and ensured I would do everything I could to stay ME.

Doctors and nurses tried to trick me into taking antidepressants daily. I would get a little cup full of pills, but I would ask everyday what each one is. They would tell me not to worry about it, those were all good for me. I refused to take any until I knew what they were. After a week my sister told them to knock it off because I was getting pissed. I was supposed to be depressed, I had just been fucking paralyzed. It is natural. Somehow I still found time to smile in that hospital bed, and even tell jokes to ease the tension of everyone.

Life is a journey and sometimes it is fucking really hard. I don’t know what problems you have and personally I don’t care. I will care if you ask me too, but way I see it, until you do it isn’t my business. What I do know is that we all have problems no matter what race, religion, tax bracket, gender, age, or whatever other category you want to use to separate people. That is what we all are, just one plain label. People.

I’m not sure how I want to close this one. I’ll just leave you with this. I have overcome this and I’m a productive member of society. The man I have become is because I faced my problems and solved them on my own. Those challenges took a cocaine abusing, drunken, womanizing, snowboarder into a drunken womanizing guy in a wheelchair. I am proud of the man I am today, and who knows what I would be doing if it weren’t for those hardships.

As a community, country, and world we need to teach people that facing and solving your problems will make you a better person. It will make you a stronger person and teach you things that you never even knew existed.

Be kind to others. Don’t worry about the car that cut you off, the rude comments made online, or the outrage the 24/7 news channel is telling you to have. Just be kind to everyone. Not just the people that think like you do.

Fknbucky

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