Posts Tagged ‘learn

23
Jan
25

Try Again

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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A quickie for you today. Just in time for lunch so we can even call it a Nooner. Ahhh my juvenile sense of humor knows no bounds and if you can’t smile a bit at some nonsense you’re doing life wrong. I have an amazing dog named Annabel for those of you that live in a cave and never read FknBucky or listen to the podcast. She is a border collie and simply awesome. She picks things up for me and fetches pretty much anything I ask her too including my phone, wallet, and keys when I drop them or can’t find them. I’m proud of that actually, it took a lot of work and patience, but I’m not afraid of work and have no patience. Yeah I meant to say it like that.

If this is a quickie get to the point Bucky. Okay, good call. My border collie has energy forever. Never tired. We play frisbee for 1.5-3 hours a day. Every freaking day. It is challenging sometimes, but I always think, there will be a day when I will wish for just one more frisbee session and on that day I’ll smile knowing I made the most of every single day I had. Okay back on point. Annie will try to play like 50 times a day. If I roll away from my desk for only a moment she takes her shot and runs to me with a ball, toy, or frisbee almost instantly. When I wake up the first thing I see is a tennis ball in my face with hopeful eyes saying “Let’s eff’ing GO!”

47 times a day I say “no, not now, get off me, can’t you see I’m working!” Sounds rough huh? Reality is I can’t play fetch 24/7 even if I wanted to. Doesn’t stop her from trying. Somedays I only say no 42 times meaning she gets 8 play sessions. She gets 2 no matter what everyday day in case you wondered. Sometimes I’ll play for 2-3 min and then stop, but this is harder because it gets her all riled up only to tell her just kidding and I go back to work. You’d think this would deter her from asking so much. Nope.

She never stops trying. I envy it. No matter how many times I say no, she will continue to try again. Sometimes she will leave a tennis ball on the end of my bed and stare at it for hours while I’m working. I’ll finally cave and start throwing it out of sheer admiration. That type of commitment eventually must be rewarded. I think about this in my own life and when I hit a roadblock or get told no, I think “what would Annie do?” Lay down, take a break, lick herself a while, and then try again. I personally skip the 3rd one, but you be you.

That is just frisbee Bucky. So is everything. A $.04 deal is no different than a 4 million deal. Same everything. You just buy a bigger toy with your commission is the only difference. So relax. Enjoy the moment. Try. Then try again. Then try again. Guess what. Try again. Try again. Let the past failures go. Learn the lesson and then forget it. Think Annie thinks about the last 472 days I said “get out of my face” when I wake up or does she think “today is the day!”

Make today the day. Stop crying about the past. Forget and do something new today. Try again.

FknBucky

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09
Jan
25

A happy plus

By Bucktown 1 Comment
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Hello my literate friends. I’ve got the anger right now so I decided to write, but it might not be what you think so please read to the end. I wanted to write a message about Christmas, then New Year’s, and now I realize we are already past one week into 2025. These days fly by without us paying attention. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and then year after year slip by. I’m 46 now. I’m a plus. What is a plus Bucky?? I’ll tell you. Recently I was on Amazon or something and a chart came up. It asked my age. Here are the choices.

18-25, 25-35, 35-45, 45+

I thought WTF when I had to check the plus box. I can deal with the gray hairs, the aches and pains in the AM, the loss of people I love, but marking that box hit me pretty hard. I thought about my goals, my life, my decisions, and all of the moments I could have done differently. Then I got drunk and texted ex-girlfriends until 4 AM. Just kidding. I’m old and only text until Matlock comes on at 9 pm.

The truth is we can’t change the past. Ever. We can learn from our mistakes and try very hard to not repeat them. That is it. No more. I like to read from a book call ZEN FLESH ZEN BONES and I highly recommend everyone on planet EARTH read it as well. There is a story in it about two monks walking down a road in a downpour. They come across a very beautiful young woman walking in a silk kimono that needs to get across a muddy section. One of the monks simply walked over to her, picked her up, carried her across the mud so that she would keep her clothes clean, and then put her down.

The two monks continued on their way without saying a word. Many hours later as they lay down to sleep the monk that didn’t carry the woman finally had to say something. All day he thought about how his friend had touched a woman when they had sworn to NOT do that very thing. He said “Friend, how could you carry that woman knowing our vows??

As he rolled over to fall asleep the other monk replied “I set her down on the side of the road, but it seems you have been carrying her all day.”

How much do you carry around all day?? How much of it is from other peoples actions that have nothing to do with you??? Imagine if you could learn to leave it at the side of the road. We should always be students, learning to be better at life, enabling us to become teachers to the next generation. If you agree with that statement what lessons do you want to teach?? I would like the people around me to become better than I am, to be smarter than I am, more patient than I am, and hopefully more prosperous than I am in all aspects of life.

I will now tell you why I was angry. My van had an oil leak. I’m told it is common with my model of vehicle and it is going to cost me about $1,000. I pay CarShield $89 a month to cover repairs that come up, but now for the second time in 5 years they denied to pay anything. Had I simply put the $89 a month I pay CarShield into an account I would still have $3,193 AFTER I paid for the repairs needed.

Instead I’ve paid them $5,340, paid auto repair workers $2,147, and have the same result. I’ve cancelled my policy with them this morning and just set up an auto pay out of my account into a new “auto” savings account. Lesson learned. This was an expensive one, but I promised myself not to carry it around with me all day. I’m going to leave it here. It isn’t going to hurt CarShield if I run around town telling everyone how horrible of a day I’m having because of this event. Nope.

I’m going to tell everyone I’m doing great. I caught the leak early before any serious damage was done. AWE AUTO in Traer, IA was able to get my van fixed in a very reasonable amount of time and for a very fair price. Live is good. I have an amazing family, a ton of awesome friends, an amazing furry best friend, a business of my own, my health is great, and on and on and on. So this PLUS is going to smile today, tomorrow, and for the rest of the year. I hope you find reasons to smile with me.

FknBucky

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P.S. I hope you share this with others if you feel the message is helpful. One moment at a time we can make the world a better place.

01
Feb
23

Drop Mind Pollution

By Bucktown 2 Comments
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Here we go. I’ve been tryin to make time to blog all last week, but somehow I kept finding excuses to do something else. It is hard to write when I’m tired. Seems odd, but my mind needs to be sharp and awake. Not the Red Bull kind of awake, but simply analyzing data with speed and ease. I’m sure this is why I have wit and comebacks when talking with others because my brain is working overtime to get the words in, analyzed, and then making my response flow out on time and with the right feeling. Words are only part of the equation. The tone of your voice, the face you make while saying those comebacks, the position your body is in (little harder to do in a wheelchair), the smile must be just right, and finally the eyes. They have to be soft and not threatening when hitting someone hard with words. Calling someone stupid is mean. Calling them stupid with soft eyes and a slight smile is funny. A lot going on in the three seconds someone tries to talk smack with me.

I love it though. The challenge. Everything in my life is a competition and I hate losing. Well, that isn’t true. I hate losing because I failed to bring my best. If I bring it all whether it is a fight, conversation, sales meeting, or anything I want to be victorious. Otherwise why are you there?? If you don’t see yourself standing in the first place spot at the end of the day why are you playing??? Who trains for 2nd place?? Funny answer. Most of you do. You have allowed others opinions to pollute your mind which then makes deals with you. Only try a little bit today. That way when you come up short it won’t be hurtful and no one will make fun of you. To that I want to say this “Fuck you and the mind polluters you hang around!!” I know Mom no swearing, but that point has to cut deep.

My nephew is at some training right now. He finished boot camp and now he is doing some additional training that will get his body in shape to go do the actual thing he is planning to do in the military. I’m being vague because it is none of your business what he is doing exactly, but this story requires you to know he is doing it. When he does it that means he is doing something that we are proud of cause he does that thing we know he is doing. Sorry I had Kamala help me with this paragraph. She won’t make it at FknBucky so back to something she won’t need intelligence for. Lighten up Francis.

I was talking to the nephew the other day and he was describing the training he was doing. A lot of everything with no sleep is what it boiled down to. He told me a whole bunch of kids have already quit. They started with 160 and by last count they only had 104. 56 people quit before the end of week 3. I don’t get it. Why did they even go?? I guarantee everyone of them in the back of their head heard the voice before day 1 saying “you won’t make it.:” I killed that voice a long time ago. He has unlimited lives like playing video games with my 8 year old niece. She makes sure I have 99 lives while playing the Simpsons with her. If I go below 90 lives it is an emergency that she fixes very quickly. Where was I?? Oh yeah. Quitter voice. It gets easier to kill him the more you do it. Pretty soon you can just Plan B that prick.

I’m proud of the nephew and hearing the intense crap they were putting him through made me have a deep respect for what he is going to accomplish. He asked what I have been doing and I replied truthfully without thinking “I made a cherry pie.” It isn’t often I wish for words back. I’m such a pansy these days…. He says “I just did a 7 mile hike with a 50 lb pack on.”

I respond with “ Lame, I made a pie. From scratch.” Can’t eat a hike with ice cream. Here is the deal. He rocked that hike. There is no chance he will quit. Zero. I tell him every time we talk “you don’t have to be first, but you better out work every other person there.” Never stop trying. I can’t hike. I can make a pie and it will be the best darn pie in Charlotte.

We all have dreams. Chase them. Go for it. Stop worrying about failure. It only exists if you allow it. I try and if it doesn’t work, I analyze why, and then try again. I gain knowledge every time so it isn’t a failure, but another step up closer to my goal. If you are going to California from Ohio and one day you make it 800 miles, but the next you only make it 50. Is that a failure or are you closer to your goal. Fix the way your mind uses information and kick to moron out that is crying you only made it 50 miles. They will sit down and wait for some other idiot to pick them up. Unfortunately the world is full of idiots. It is easy to be one. You don’t have to be one though. You read FknBucky that is like making it 2,000 miles a day.

Funny I had a blog in my head about mentors and heroes, but my heart decided to write a different message. I want to write forever. I want millions to find inspiration and hope in my message. I’m not there yet, but in my mind I have been there since I wrote the first sentence on the first blog. Somedays I make great progress and others I make very little, but the fight continues. Quitting will never be an option. If it was that means I never actually started.

Whatever you want start now. Right now. Sign up for the online class. Research starting your own business. Go volunteer. Mend a broken friendship. Most importantly stop listening to people and voices that say “you can’t.” They are wrong. They are scared to try. They are nothing to you. Just start and you will see how quickly all those negative influences become a sentence in a paragraph somewhere that eventually gets edited out.

Love who you are today. Tomorrow is not guaranteed.

FknBucky

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20
Feb
22

I’ve had Enough

By Bucktown 2 Comments
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Oh man. It has been a while since I pounded on the keyboard. Life has been busy and I get sucked into the trap just like everyone else. Each day being the same as the one before it. Becomes easy and the days click by without us noticing. I need to make time for the things I love, the things I love to do, and most importantly the people I love. Speaking of things I love to do, it is time I had myself a good old fashioned rant. Lots of topics so lets get some.

Finally. 2022. The world is waking up. Great to see. I have dreamed of this moment. What could make you so happy Bucky?? Sports of course. Ahhh sports. We love sports in America. Cheering for the home team, supporting our high school athletes while they learn hard work, team work, put in the time and effort so one day they can have a chance to be a champion. Ooops my bad, that is what used to be. The sports God has heard my prayers. Every night I say ”God, can you please make women’s sports more interesting??” Lets talk real for a minute. Girls are slow, weak, and now we have a solution!! Surprised I didn’t think of it myself.

Want to make womens sports more interesting?? Have men do them!! It is genius. Lets be clear on something. I don’t care about transgender this or that. You do you. As long as you are not hurting a child or someone I care about knock yourself out. The swimmer girl that was born with a penis and was on the mens team for a couple years is a woman now. She is dominating the sport and beating all these stupid girls that bought into the whole ”work hard” and be the best junk. Nope, in 2022 you can be a female athlete that does everything right and still lose. Lucky for me it is only the beginning.

Take the Olympics, athletes will do anything to win, have an edge, or have a way to guarantee them a win. We’ve seen the stories of all kinds of athletes that take drugs, steroids, and all kinds of shady behavior to have an edge. People are messed up. If you haven’t learned that by now then you’re pretty much an idiot. Currently there are two biological men swimming on womens teams at the collegiate level. I’m sure there are more, but they haven’t made headlines yet. Wanting to win is addictive, similar to money, and will consume some people so much they will do anything to get it. Anything.

There are people in this world that will change their name from Sam to Samantha just to win a trophy. When that starts to happen on a large scale (it will, just a matter of time) little girls everywhere are going to be stuck on the sidelines watching a 6’3, 225 lbs, and super cut ”Samantha” take their spot. Soon Shane will be Shana, Joe will be Jessica, Ryno will become Ryna, and on down the line. Let me take a minute to explain something. I don’t care what label you throw at me. Transphobic, misogynist, and well I haven’t made it about race, but give me time. I’ll find a way to make them mad too. I don’t participate in that whole label thing so fire away. I treat everyone I meet like crap equally.

I don’t have the answer. It doesn’t work that way. You have to read and then think about what you’ve read, think about the lessons you’ve learned in life, and apply the logic and wisdom you have to the situation coming up with an opinion. That opinion (yours) doesn’t mean a thing to anyone else, but you had better think it thru real good because people you’ve never met will judge you based on it. Thing about opinions is they can change, but only if you’re allowed to speak in the first place. This cancel BS stops progress, stops people from talking, and when that happens we all lose. Want to stop being racist?? Make friends with minorities. Want to not be homophobic?? Talk with the gays. Yeah it is that easy, but when you stop people from talking it becomes impossible to grow and let your opinion evolve.

Okay off track there. I can’t be the only person on Earth that thinks this situation sucks. Some little girl that bought into the do things right, work hard, practice hard, give up fun time to train, train harder than everyone else, want it more, sacrifice everything only to be 2nd place to a man playing girl. Next year it will be 3rd place. Five years from now she might not even make the team. Why try?? Way I see it we have mens sports and women sports for a very simple reason. Not anymore. The line isn’t blurred society decided to pull out their non-gender penis and peed all over that line.

I can’t think of a more awful thing than robbing little girls of their dreams. Your desire to show everyone how ”woke” you are is flipping stupid. All actions have consequences and right now a whole lot of good people are ignoring those consequences because they are afraid some jerk with screen name SUPER-WOKE will call them names. Well Super-Woke meet FknBucky. I am the antidote to the poison you continually throw around without a care of the consequences and wreckage you leave behind. I say enough.

FknBucky

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24
Sep
21

What if vs when

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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Another week comes to an end. Summer 2021 has come to an end. In a week we will be in the last quarter of this year. How does time go by so fast?? I do quite a bit of reflecting on my life. I don’t mean looking back with regrets, but looking back to see how much progress I’ve made on my goals for life. I only have one question for you. If not now, then when??? When will you start your own business, when are going to travel to the place you dream of, when are you going to talk with the cute girl at the office?? If you start looking at life with ”when” instead of “what if” you will find it to be more rewarding.

What if is what dreamers ask. They secretly wish this and that happened or will happen with no real plan. Days, months, and years go by without any tangible progress towards the ”what if” you keep saying to yourself. What if I move? What if I go back to school? What if I talk to her? What if I go out on my own? While asking yourself these questions can be useful, it can also lead to negative thinking that always finds a way of coming true. In life you ALWAYS get what you think about. Read the book ”The Secret” if you haven’t already. If you have read it again. The issue of asking “what if” is the answers you give yourself. If I move, I won’t have friends there, if I go back to school and fail, if I talk to her she might not like me, and if I start my own business and don’t make it????

The negative answers always come and now you have already been unsuccessful without doing a darn thing. Seems like a bad plan to make your life awesome. Change your way of thinking by simply using a different word. When I move I’ll have the opportunity to start with a clean slate and the reality is your friends aren’t going anywhere. When I go back to school I’ll be on my way to building my self confidence, learn new skills, and be on way to making more money doing something I love. When I talk with her I may find out she has been waiting on my dumbass to say hello. When I start my own business I can finally start to do things my way and stop making others money.

I started my own business 2 years ago. COVID didn’t help, but there will always be challenges. If it wasn’t COVID there would be something else to overcome. Regardless of skin color, gender, rich, poor, sexuality, or any of the other labels media and politicians use to divide us there will be problems. If your parents did their job you will have no problems identifying them and solving them. You don’t understand Bucky. Some random guy called me a racist word in the grocery store parking lot. Perfect now you have an excuse to be angry and complain the world is against you. You give a lot of power to some ignorant moron you’ll never see again. I say ”Fuck that guy.” Not literally. Move on and forget it. Explain to me how arguing with idiots helps you reach your goals…

The beauty of being a ”when” thinker is you will subconsciously start to put a date on it. When I talk to that girl tomorrow I’ll know if she is interested or not, allowing me to stop wasting energy on the ”what if”. You might find out her Dad is the racist you ran into at the Piggly Wiggly which helps you decide if you want to raise little white power babies. Racism isn’t funny Bucky. Thanks for pointing out some obvious shit. Now move on and take this big sack of worthless anger with you. I hope one day you learn to just leave it and not fill that sack up in the first place. Lots of great people in this world, don’t waste time on crappy people, and learn to ask yourself “when” instead of “what if”.

Many times the things that I write are a reminder to me instead of a ”lesson” to you. I get caught up with the anger, the sadness, the fear of failure, and the worthless habit of blaming others for my problems. That last one will be another blog coming soon, but for today I really hope you use this blog as motivation to reflect on your own life to see what questions you’re asking.

I wrote this at 4 AM this morning, but just getting around to sharing it now. Not sure where this all came from, but it sounded good to me. I’m a when person and not a what if.

FknBucky

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28
Mar
21

When Kids Fail, we all win.

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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Disclosure: I wrote this blog a couple days ago, but my real life job (the one that pays for all my luxury items like my chick magnet mini van) got in the way of my writing career.

I like the blog I wrote yesterday. Sometimes the next day when I read them again I’m like “Eh, it could have been better.” That is okay though. Nothing is perfect every time. It is okay to fail and in fact it is good when you do. I say often and as far as I know I’m the only person I’ve heard say it so it is my quote. I expect credit every time you steal it. Here you go. Bad days are great, without them how would you know you’re having a good day??? Wow my crippled ass oozes wisdom. Just remember if you call me crippled I’m going to stab you and get away with it. I am just faking being paralyzed for the chicks. I used to tell that joke on stage and one of the worthless crap bag other comics actually started to BELIEVE it. Damn people are dumb. He literally grabbed me and pulled me out of my chair in front of the Comedy Store in La Jolla. Sure wish a couple Iowa/Wisconsin friends were with me that night. Dude would still be using a straw to eat steak. Someone did punch him in the face, but not nearly enough times. Okay way off course now. That guys sucks at life. His name is Gordon. Feel free to punch every Gordon you meet just in case it is him. How many can there be???

Failing is good. I just proved it isn’t always a good thing. Gordon failed at life. Like completely. Don’t take failing to that level. When I used to snowboard (I MISS IT SO MUCH) I would often say “if you aren’t falling you’re not trying.“. You have to push the limits to grow and sometimes you just miss the mark. I love to make people laugh, truly it is quite possibly my favorite thing to do. If you know me personally you know this to be true. Sometimes though my jokes fall very flat. It is kind of embarrassing and a few times are burned into my memory like “Oh shit, I really wish I had that comment back..”. I wouldn’t change a thing though. When this happens I usually say “they can’t all be zingers..”. You have to put yourself out there or be happy hugging the wall, riding the pine, or any other analogy about not getting into the game.

How you deal with failing is a massive part of the character you have as a human. If you throw a fit and whine to anyone that will listen well lets just say that is not the right way. Accepting the failure and then analyzing it to learn from it so that you are better next time is the right reaction. Not always the easiest option, but it is the right one. When we jump in to save our kids the pain of failure at ANY age you are stealing the lesson from them. Our first reaction is to protect them which is a noble one, but you have to fight that urge and let nature do its thing. Learning to fail correctly can start at any age. We never stop failing/learning as we grow older, but the problems and consequences get a lot bigger as we age. This is where wisdom comes into play. Learning the lessons at age 3, 4, or 12 years old lets us develop the skill of coping with failure. When you “protect” a child from this hardship they miss out on the lesson which leads to much harder times later on in life.

All of a sudden you are 20 years old and failure feels like the end of the world because you’ve never dealt with it. Let the lego tower fall and break so little Timmy learns to go thru the motions. First is the disbelief the tower feel, then anger at the thought of the stupid tower, depression because it sucks to have to start over, and then acceptance that it happened and the lesson of why it happened. Next time Timmy will build a larger base to keep the tower steady as it gets taller and taller. Grabbing the tower as it starts to fall and handing Timmy a cookie is wrong. He learns nothing and becomes fat. Not a horrible thing cause when Pippa comes out with a need for children burgers I’m coming for fat little Timmy first. Read the blog “Royals” if you want to understand that last line. You really do have to read every blog.

Timmy Burch lego. Google it.

None of this means you can’t help. In fact quite the opposite. You should be there to help point out the lessons learned and guide a young person in the correct way to accept failure. Help them see the lesson. Now here is the big one. If no one ever let you fail you don’t have the wisdom needed to teach this ever important life lesson. This leads to the snowball effect that continues for generations. Every time it gets a little bit worse until some catastrophic event happens leaving many to ask “What happened?? How could this of happened??” You heard it here first. All of the problems in the world lead back to Timmy and those darn legos. How do you prevent this?? First of all don’t name your kid Timmy and never let them play with legos. Easy enough. I’m here to help.

Life is awesome. It is also very very hard sometimes. Learning how to cope is a big part of having a happy life. I guarantee you that at some point in your life you will experience failure that seems overwhelming, but if you have had practice your whole life you’ll be ready to deal with it. No one goes thru life without stupid mean challenges hitting us in the face sooner or later. Take the punch and learn to duck next time, but also learn how to punch back. Exactly. Violence solves problems. Another great lesson for young kids, but I’ll write that blog another day. Right after I write the “Your kids should only be friends with other kids that look like them and think like them” blog. A lot of sarcasm there unless your name is Gordon. Then get ready. We are coming for you.

Remember young people are always watching. What kind of example are you???

Be kind to others. Not for them, but for you. You will love the person you become when you put the feelings and needs of other people in front of yours.

FknBucky

24
Mar
21

Stupid Kids

By Bucktown Leave a Comment
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Wednesday. Hump Day. Those darn car insurance mafia people have ruined hump day for me as well. I always think about that camel walking thru the office. I will gladly lead the rebellion when it is time that we all stand together against this common enemy. White, black, yellow, green, smart, stupid, guy, girl, oak tree, slutty people, not slutty people, tall people, short people, kind, mean, in between, and pretty much ANYONE on Earth except for the gingers. I do not want those soul stealing psychos on my revolution team. Dang it. I’ll take them only to keep them off Team Car Insurance and we get to put them in Joe Biden’s children cages until combat day. Oh come on, it is just one little dig on ya…. Funny the fake outrage people aren’t clamoring for TV time now. Tell me again how they aren’t manipulating assholes. Don’t fall for it. Damn I totally forgot what my point was today. I started writing planning to get around to something, but I can’t for the life of me remember what the hell it was right now. I blame a Ginger. One of you got to me!! ***I make fun of Gingers because it is funny and they have no souls***. Just in case you wondered.

Oh yeah now I got it. I have one of my nephews staying with me this week. Many of you that follow this blog know how much I enjoy being an Uncle and I take that role seriously. Read the “Eat Your Beans” blog as it is always a good one. Young men need to be taught and guided on how to be a man. Looking people in the eye when you shake their hand, speak with a purpose, think thru your actions before you start doing anything, and most importantly you get respect when you give it. Be kind, pay attention, and never let people treat you poorly regardless of the circumstance. Make good choices and realize that sometimes the right choice is the one that benefits you personally the least. The ME ME ME attitude that is so prevalent in this world is a social cancer. People need to learn the more you do for others the better your life will be, but this takes time and the instant gratification crew have no patience for that.

Having good character is more important long term than the instant feel good now things that puts other peoples feelings and needs second to yours. To have a fulfilling life you have to build a solid foundation of doing right by others everyday regardless of what is in it for you. Class is not only in session on the weekends, evenings, or when it is convenient for you. Nope. It is 24/7. Every hour of every day is the time to show young people what it is to be a person of substance. You don’t teach by lecturing when it comes to these lessons, you teach by doing. You want the young people in your life to be good humans then actively pursue being good yourself. They will follow and are soaking up everything you do like a sponge. Make sure they are soaking up the right stuff because that’s all you put out.

School can only do so much and truthfully if you are leaving the character of the young people in your life to be molded by public school then you‘ve already failed. I talk with my nephews like they are men simply because one day God willing they will be. When they do something dumb I point it out. Not to be mean, but the complete opposite. I want them to learn and do better. There are a lot of dumbass people on this planet simply because no one loved them enough to call out their BS early on. Teenagers are supposed to be stupid. It is what they are. It is up to grown folks to remind them constantly with the goal of beating every little bit of self confidence out of them. Ha. Obviously not true. Don’t just point out the mistake, take a moment to explain why certain words or actions are not the right way, and then show (not tell) them the correct path. Show them how to be better and how great life is when you put others ahead of yourself.

Kids pick up on things so let them learn by experience. Let them see the difference of walking into a room and not saying a word to the other people in that room vs walking into said room, introducing themselves to each person, looking them in the eye and shaking hands. I’m not a parent, but I will say this, when I take my nephews with me while working I get so many compliments on them for the simple thing of them introducing themselves correctly. That in itself must mean they‘re doing something right. It is never to early to start these life lessons. Simply ask yourself this question “Do I love the young people in my life enough to show them how to become a person of character or is it too much work??”

It doesn’t matter what task you do with kids it only matters you spend time with them. I can teach the same message while throwing a football in the backyard as I can baking an apple pie. None of these things are rocket science. Finish what you start. Don’t do things half assed. Be proud of your work and when you do something do it the best you can. No one is going to make fun of a boy that baked a pie if that pie is stupid awesome tasting. They will make fun of you playing catch if you miss the ball and it hits you in the face. At least I would.

Enjoy your life, lead by example, and simply find ways to be kind to others.

FknBucky

23
Jul
17

Eat Your Beans

By Bucktown 2 Comments
Categories: learning and Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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I recently had the pleasure of hosting my two nephews (10 & 13) for a little over a week here in the QC.  We had an amazing time with lots of laughs and in the future, I’ll share some of them with you.  We did all kinds of things including kayaking, paddle boarding, whitewater rafting, zip lining, drinking beer (that one was me), and just living.  We also went to visit some very good friends of mine that cooked up a barbeque with ribs, homemade mac and cheese, and of course some beans.

 

My youngest nephew was having the time of his life until he saw those beans.  It was like someone told him that Hillary actually won.  Ha ha. This isn’t political, I’m just having fun with you.  He dreaded those beans with true fear on his face.  I pride myself on being the cool uncle and play that role incredibly well if I may say so.  With that being said, it would have been very easy for me to say don’t worry about, you don’t have to eat those.  Why fight it?? SO much simpler and I get to be COOL.

 

I like being a prick though so I made him eat some beans.  It was comical.  They were pork and beans and he ate HALF a bean at a time.  Gagged and chugged water afterwards.  I was dying inside.  I’ve never seen anything so funny. I almost gave him another scoop just to keep the party going.  4 hours later (slight exaggeration) he finally finished his beans and we said thank you and goodbye.

 

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While we drove back to Charlotte a real conversation about life sparked up and I make a point to always be honest with the boys.  I told my nephew that I didn’t care if he ate the beans for dinner as it had nothing to do with that.  He asked “Why make me do it then?”

 

I told him “Because you’re a man in training, and as men we have to do things we don’t want to do all the time.”

 

Some of you get it and others think that he is only 10.  Let him be a kid.  Here is my answer to that.  He is a kid while swimming, playing, hanging with his buddies, and all the rest of the day.  If the adults in his life don’t teach him that sometimes you HAVE to do things you really don’t want to, how is he going to be a functioning adult.  God willing he will grow up to be an adult, but that doesn’t make him ready for the world.

 

If you don’t learn to overcome LITTLE things in life, how are you going to react when the world throws real problems at you?? I’ve had my fair share of challenges in life same as you.  Everyone has setbacks, beat downs, and sometimes life just kicks you for no reason, but it is how you react to those moments that make you the person you are.  Now at 38 years old I smile and ask for a bigger spoon!

 

I’m glad people cared enough about me when I was young to make me “eat my beans.”  I don’t pretend I know anything about being a parent.  I just know what it takes to overcome and that advice is good for anyone.  You don’t pick up a football for the first time at 26 and then go win the Superbowl right??  Those guys start at age 6 now and train for decades to make it.  Shouldn’t we expect EVERYONE to be training every day to be ready for what life might throw at you.

 

Life is going to come at you that is inevitable.  Rich, poor, black, white, boy, or girl we all know that it will hit the fan eventually. You can sit and wait for someone to “say it’s okay someone else will solve your problem.”

 

Or you can smile, grab a spoon, and EAT YOUR BEANS.

 

FknBucky

10
Jun
14

Learning to Fail

By Bucktown 2 Comments
Categories: Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I wrote this blog, named it, and then typed the title into BING images. Apparently I'm not the only one with this thought.....

I wrote this blog, named it, and then typed the title into BING images. Apparently I’m not the only one with this thought…..

Obama is right. Not easy to say that, but something needs to be done about all the school shootings. It makes me sad that it happens almost every week for some reason and I’m laying in bed trying to figure what the hell is going on?? Plus I can’t sleep for some stupid reason. Insomnia sucks. I did just have a thought though and figured I’d share some of my wisdom… Jessica Alba is hot. Ha ha. Thats the only wise thing you’ll hear from me.

We are now seeing the “everyone gets a ribbon” generation all grown up. I think there is some good in it, and well who doesn’t want their little Timmy to be happy everyday??? Heres the problem sometimes no matter what you do, what you try, or what you say one day life is going to kick you in the nuts. It happens to every single person on the planet A LOT. Rich, poor, gay, straight, black, white, Mexican — EVERYONE. Wait.. When did Mexican become a color???

So what do you do when everything goes ka-poot?? Less swearing Mom. Check. Thats just it. When we take failure out of kids lives we rob them of the learning experience of how to deal with it. It is just as important as learning how to be a gracious winner, and in fact I believe even more important. Learning to fail is a skill that all great leaders, inventors, entrepreneurs LEARN in life. Look at Abraham Lincoln do you think he would have been the same leader at the time when a broken country needed him so badly had he not had those previous life experiences that taught him so much wisdom??? The best lessons are taught through/from failure so if you never learn how to fail, you miss out on a whole lot. Maybe we are seeing the results of that today. Just a thought..

I don’t have all the answers, but I know taking away the guns of people that didn’t do anything wrong isn’t a good one. I know that the mental problems of these kids are serious and need to be identified sooner or we need to find a way to stop creating these monsters. Parents want to “protect” their kids from all the bad, but sometimes we need shit to hit the fan. Just a little at first so you learn to cope with that, and then as you get older the shit gets thicker. It is going to happen. It just does. Drugs are not the answer either. These anti-depressants scare the crap out of me and many of these people that “snap” are on them. You can’t mess with emotions, but you can learn to control them and use them. All of them.

Just because you can’t get a girlfriend doesn’t mean you kill your 3 roommates with a knife and then go on a killing spree targeting sorority girls. What did this kid get taught growing up?? Think he earned that shiny BMW he was driving??? I’m not pointing the finger at his parents, I’m just sharing a thought. Maybe if he had learned to fail, he would have learned to pick himself back up becoming stronger in the process. You know the old saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

It is wonderful times we live in. I’d hate to think it any other way. We have computers, I-Pods, a better understanding of different cultures and each other than any other time in history. It just seems that maybe in our lets all have a charmed life attitude we are forgetting something. Bad happens. I don’t know why, but I do know the incredible lessons I’ve learned from those type of events happening in my life. I didn’t give up, I didn’t shoot 30 people and you want to know why??

It’s simple. My parents and family taught from day one to suck it up. That’s not PC Bucky. It’s not supposed to be. Learning to fail is just like every other skill one acquires in life. You have to practice it. You have to TRY to be able to fail so you are learning two things. Just don’t shelter your kids to much as it can’t be healthy. I see a theme in these kids that go nuts. They are wondering where their charmed life is, that was promised to them?? It isn’t reality. The world isn’t perfect and just because you’re here on planet Earth doesn’t mean you are going to fit in. Sometimes it isn’t easy either. You have to work at it.

You make your life charming. YOU make your life great. You. The sooner YOU learn this life lesson the sooner you will let the bad wash off you like water off a ducks back and focus on the good in the world/your life. Thus allowing you to fit into society and help make the world better, not make a headline for 3 days by senselessly hurting people you’ve never even met.

Fknbucky

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