Saturday night. I have playoff football playing in the background. I have another wheelchair I need to put together, but keep avoiding it because it is going to be a pain in the butt. I know better than to put things off that need to be done, but it is supposed to snow tomorrow here in Charlotte which means the city will be closed down for a few days. I believe it is going to be a lot of ice so I have no reason to drive around in that crap. I trust myself but I have zero confidence in the other drivers here in the South.
Sad to see Bob Saget pass away. We all grew up watching full house. I still remember seeing Bob do stand up comedy on HBO for the first time. I was blown away at how dirty he was. He was way beyond controversial. A few times I was even thinking ”Damn you can’t say that”, but he did say it and I loved him for it. I love people that say whatever they want. The ones that are always offended can piss off. You’re boring. Nobody wants to walk on your eggshells.
Bob had a chance to make a lot of money being a TV Dad and he took it. Can’t fault him for that although some do. It is different times now though with Instagram, Tik Toc, twitter, and all the other ways dumb drunk kids tell on themselves. Thank God there were no video cameras around when I was young although I was able to make myself memorable most times without pics or video. Only 1 FknBucky on the planet and you knew when you met him. My goal is to continue writing this year and find ways to get my blog out to the masses. It starts with writing more. I get ideas for blogs, but have been lacking in the follow thru department. You can’t chase dreams sitting still.
Whatever it is you want, you have to go get it. Everything is achievable if you are willing to put in the work. You don’t get to live your dream if you crush 12 beers every night. Well unless your dream is to crush 12 busch lights every night. Then you’ve made it friend. I hope your dreams are a bit bigger than this. I mean if you want to dream go for it all!!! 18 Busch Lights a night!! I believe in you. The truth is you have to be working when others aren’t. No matter what it is you desire, I guarantee you there are 100 other humans on Earth chasing the same thing. When you quit at 5 pm everyday, there is someone else pushing till 6 pm, 7 pm, all night.
My dream is to travel and write. I am going to make it. I see myself doing it already. If you can’t see me reaching all of my goals you don’t know me very well. I get down on myself, have hard times, doubt myself, and say F it I’m done. I don’t though. I don’t quit, I have my pity moment and then I get back to the grind. I’m thinking I wrote this blog for myself. I needed a kick in the ass. We all need an extra push from time to time. That is why great friends are important to have or a wonderful wife that is willing to physically harming you to make sure you get out of bed and chase that dream…..
RIP Bob — I’m willing to bet wherever Bob Saget is, he is hitting on Betty White right now. Play on Playa!!
I want to share a story with you today. A very important one that I hope will open your eyes, your heart, and help motivate you to count your blessings instead of constantly wishing for more. There is a club that no one wants to join. There is no name for it, it has no leader, and it is guaranteed that all members wish they could unjoin. It is a club of tragedy. Accidents that change the body is the cost of membership. I became a member April 1st, 2002 and have been dealing with it every single day since. This isn’t my story though.
I volunteer because I am able to help and I know that. I offer my everything to the people I talk with at the rehab hospital. I will answer any questions no matter how personal, help with any equipment they may need or want to know about, and I’m happy to talk with family members that want to learn/understand how to best help the loved one that is going thru this physical nightmare. I’ve probably talked with at least few hundred confused/scared people over the years and I’m very proud of that.
Travis and Staci Hoyle gave me permission to use their real names in this blog. Travis was injured a couple months ago and is currently using a wheelchair. I want to express one thing here very strongly. It isn’t your business how it happened. Don’t ask. Ever. It is not okay. Don’t say I’m one of those people that just blurt it out. Travis will tell you if he wants to. Instead do something easy. Talk to him like you would without the chair. He is the same person today as he was 6 months ago. Bust his balls, call him ugly, give him a hard time about driving a Nissan, or whatever else you normally do.
The Hoyle’s have a tough road ahead. It isn’t impossible, but it is hard and they will need that 4 wheel drive of his F150, (it is actually a 2004 Nissan 4×4 Supercharged) to get thru it. “Travis made sure I corrected that.” I have no doubts that they will. This is a strong family from what I have seen. Leave your pity at home. Nobody needs that crap. Bring your happiness, smiles, never give up attitude, and instead of asking for details on what happened say ”I know you got this and I’m here if you need anything.”
I see strength, fear, and determination in Staci and Travis’s eyes. It is okay to have fear because everything is new and we fear what we don’t know. The strength they have has nothing to do with lifting weights. True strength is in a persons mind, it is strong to accept reality, it is strong to smile first thing in the morning and say I can do this, it is strong to remember you’re not the only one going thru this, and most importantly it is strong to acknowledge other people are hurting as well. Pity parties are stupid and worthless so have a strength party. Challenge everyone around you to use the strength God gave them to overcome this obstacle. Once again I will say I have no doubt they will overcome this, but friends and family have a HUGE role to play to make that happen.
Unfortunately bad things happen to great people all the time. It is unfair and makes me want to scream at nothing sometimes. 20 years of membership and yes sometimes I still have moments of extreme weakness and anger. The key is to not live there. Accept the emotions, work thru them naturally, and get back to living your best life. Avoid the ”what if” hole because it simply leads to depression, anger, and regrets. What if I didn’t go, what if I didn’t stop for coffee, what if I didn’t date her, what if what if, and more what if. That is pointless because no matter how much you torture yourself it will not ever change the outcome.
You don’t have to be Travis and Staci to use the advice above. Everyone has hardships in life, hardship plays no favorites, and facing it head on is the right course of action. There is a benefit for Travis on Sunday. I’m told the 300 available tickets sold out very quickly. Money is always welcome and helpful, but kind words and genuine caring is fuel for the fighting spirit alive inside of Travis and Staci. This is not an easy road, but once again it is not impossible. The only thing different is Travis got a lot shorter and won’t be running up any stairs for a while.
Remember as this battle goes on that smiles and laughter are okay. In fact they are a must. Focus on the things that make you smile. Watching your kids succeed at anything. Holding your partner in front of a fireplace on a rainy night. Laughing with your friends while telling old stories. One of my best friends growing up and I would always yell when Welcome Home (Sanitarium) by Metallica came on. It is a random thing, but after my accident while having a tough moment in life that song come over the radio. I was instantly transported back in time and smiled gratefully that I was still alive to enjoy that memory. It is okay to be happy while dealing with tragedy. To this day every time I hear this song, I’m instantly 19 years old again, yelling at the radio with my friends while drinking a Busch Light.
It is easy to find reasons to be unhappy, mean, and ungrateful. True strength is when you put all those aside and find one reason to smile. You only need one. Kids, wife, family, friends, pets, food in your stomach, warm place to sleep, and so on. You can choose to be happy in horrible situations. In life when we are forced into situations beyond our control it is important to concentrate on the one thing we always have control of. Your Attitude. It is easy to smile at the end of the trip, but more important to keep that smile and positive attitude going during the journey no matter how long it may be.
I hope everyone who reads this will share it. You never know who needs to hear the message above. If you can donate money please do and then share this message. If you can’t send money I only ask you share this message so others will see it and be able to help.
Count your blessings. Be grateful for the people in your life. Truly grateful for them.
FknBucky
READ * THINK * LIVE FREE
We still need Justice for Ryan Cooper. Please come forward if you have any information. As Russell Crowe said in the Gladiator “We will have our vengeance, in this lifetime or the next.”
Justice for Ryan Cooper. I don’t understand why they haven’t found the person responsible for this insane evil act, but I’m still hopeful they will find the pricks.
The crazy part is I started this blog about four weeks ago.
I have a dozen blogs that are 80% complete. I just need to final edit them, but I get distracted and 4 days later whatever I was writing about becomes old news. A friend sent this article to me wondering if I would write about it. That answer is yes. I don’t know much for details, but this story is true, just happened, tragic, and yet romantic in a weird way. It shows the sacrifice one human is willing to make to ensure the safety of a stranger. I want to say this next point and regardless of your political position I hope you feel the same way. Those 13 service members should NOT have died in Afghanistan. It makes me sick that the incompetence of old people in power caused the needless death of those young military members.
Today I want to talk about Joaquin Romero. You’ve never heard of him. He worked at La Jolla Zip Zoom Zipline in North San Diego County. He was 34 years old and certainly didn’t expect to die as he got ready for work last Saturday. None of us do, but the truth is, at any point of everyday the clock could run out. Stop spending time on trivial BS. Stop hating people you don’t know and in fact stop hating anyone. It is ALL wasted energy. Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and any of the others don’t care that you hate them. They sleep just fine, but you allow them to live rent free in your mind. Someone please tell me how hating Donald Trump all day makes your life more enjoyable. I’ll wait.
Mr Romero was helping a young lady get hooked up on the zip line when she started slipping. He grabbed her harness in an attempt to steady her, but it was too late and they both went about 100 feet down the zip line. This man you’ve never met decided to let go. He knew the 70 foot fall was going to kill him, but he let go anyway. He knew the line would most likely not hold the weight of both of them and made the ultimate decision. This wasn’t like Hollywood where the actor gets back up, but real life where you have no extra lives.
This type of sacrifice blows the mind. I can’t imagine being faced with that decision in the blink of an eye. One moment thinking about how you’ll grab some beers after work, hopefully run into the cocktail waitress you have a crush on, and the next moment you are about to plunge to your end. In a few seconds you find yourself hanging 70 ft above the ground on a cable that can’t hold two people. You can’t call timeout, try again, scream you’re sorry for any past mistakes. Nope, you just let go and fall to your death.
It reminds me of soldiers that jump on a grenade in order to save his brothers next to him. Think he checks to see what color the other men are before making that final jump?? The picture is Kyle Carpenter. He literally jumped on a grenade. The least you can do is to remember his name and recognize people like this exist in real life. This is a debt none of us will ever be able to repay. You can’t even let someone go in front of you at the Walmart check out when they have 2 items and you have a full cart.
There are clearly great people in this world. All around us. You don’t know someones story or history. How many friends do you have?? How many of them know everything about you?? Do you know everything about them??? I’m going to say very few. You’re too busy to listen to someone else’s story. We get so wrapped up in BS that we forget what it is to simply be a good human. The young lady hanging on the zip line that a stranger killed himself to save, do you think she asked who he voted for in the last election???
I talk about Mr Romero and his selfless act. It is insane to think about. I wonder if he was vaccinated?? That is a joke. We have all these nurses, police, firemen and women, grocery store workers that were held up on this pedestal during the lockdown months. They got up and worked every day while others got paid extra money to not work. They didn’t get a bonus. Every couple of days some D-Bag politician would get on TV and talk about how much their sacrifice meant to the rest of us. Liars. They didn’t give a crap. Those same ”heroes” are now the enemy and being fired for not getting the vaccine. It makes me sick to think about.
You have to ask yourself one question. Do I have the strength to sacrifice myself for others?? It doesn’t have to be death. That is only good for one moment. Start small. Sacrifice your time. Listen to someone that doesn’t have anyone to talk to. Cook meals for homeless people on Thanksgiving. Be a foster parent to kids or dogs. Maybe both. Stop and pick up the litter you see. I watched a guy tonight walking his Golden Retriever that was munching on a plastic plant pot. I passed him with Annie, looked back at the street, and sure enough his dog dropped it and he kept on walking. I turned around and picked it up myself because I have character.
Sacrifice your money. Give to those in need. Pay for someones lunch. Do you know how great it feels to randomly pay for someones groceries that are obviously in need of a kind gesture. You got $70 to blow at the bar Friday and Saturday, but no money to help a struggling family??
Start small. Let a car merge in front of you on your way home. Talk to the elderly person two houses down like they are the only person in the world for an hour. Take your dog to a new park or on a walk instead of just opening the door and shoving your fur friend into the back yard. Buy a couple greeting cards and send them to old friends you haven’t talked to in years. Friendships are precious gifts so never take them for granted. In fact one could say ”Be thankful for the friendships you have”.
You have all the power to make your day and someone else’s wonderful. Use it.
Justice for Ryan Cooper. No one will forget him and we will search for the person/persons responsible forever. The truth will come out and you will be held accountable.
When I write these blogs I have a thought in my head that I can only get out by putting the words down on paper. I think about things constantly as the world around me changes I analyze everything in real time deciding how I feel about it. This is just the way I’m wired I guess and it isn’t changing at this point. The reason I say that is because yesterday was a roller coaster of emotion on my 8-9 hour drive to Alabama to spend Thanksgiving with my brothers family. I lived here for a good amount of time before I moved to Charlotte so quite of people in this small community know me as the better looking, smarter, definitely more intelligent brother.
I witnessed a semi truck drive over a car in Atlanta. I was on the phone with a business, when 2 lanes over (6 lanes at this point) a car tried to drive under a semi and was driven over. My immediate response was ”Oh My God” and I’m quite certain people lost their lives. It looked really bad, my heart broke for those involved, and I thought of their families getting ready for a fun holiday tomorrow/today with family only to have it become a tragedy. I drive A LOT. More than any of my friends. I’ve driven from Coast to Coast and from Canada to Mexico at least a dozen times. I am baffled by the horrible driving I witness daily.
Two hours after witnessing this accident I was caught up in traffic slowing to a stop and for the most part doing 5-10 mph for over 30 minutes. I finally got up to where the accident was only to see it was on the Northbound side of the Freeway. The only reason I was in stop and go traffic for 30 minutes was because looky-loos had to slow down and look at the crap sandwich on the other side of the freeway. I made a very sweet video about my feelings during this situation. If cursing offends you please don’t watch it. I believe in the 33 second video only 2 words are not cuss words. It is mostly for shock value and I hoped it would give my friends a laugh.
I made it to the exit in Southern Alabama and was only about 7 minutes from my LA (Lower Alabama) home. I pulled up to a very familiar intersection where lots of flashing lights were going on as the fire department was out directing traffic and not letting people turn left. I was going right at this T intersection, but still rolled down my window to confirm that was okay. I asked ”Can I go right??” and got this response from a sassy firewoman ”I don’t know, can you???”.
Clearly she knew who I was. FknBucky is famous. Thought you knew. I asked if my not as good looking as me brother was at the accident and she replied ”yes”. I asked if it was bad and she again said ”yes”. Little Brother has been on the volunteer fire department for almost a decade now and has seen a lot of bad things. Being this close to the freeway he has seen things most of us pray daily we will never have to witness. This part of the blog is going to be hard to read. People need to understand the consequences of doing stupid crap in a car.
The driver of the car thought it would be a good idea to pass other cars on this two lane highway. Accelerating to well over the speed limit the driver pulled out in the oncoming traffic lane and started to pass other drivers. I know this stretch of road and there is a town in about 10 miles. Even if they could do 80 miles an hour the whole way a person maybe would arrive 45 seconds sooner, but I’ll let you judge if that 45 seconds was worth the gamble. What is the wager Bucky?? Well, if you win you arrive to the 25 mile an hour zone and stop light 45 seconds sooner than if you had just drove the speed limit. If you lose people in your vehicle die.
While passing the cars it is believed a car came at this car so to avoid a head on collision the driver had to swerve quickly back into the correct lane. When they did this at extremely unsafe speeds this driver drove straight into the back of another vehicle. The vehicle lost control, flipped and rolled, and got all kinds of smashed up before finally coming to a rest. There were very bad injuries to the people in that all vehicles involved. I know of a similar accident where all 4 teenagers in the car were decapitated. Easily avoidable incidents like this happen way to often. In fact a few years ago about a couple hundred yards from my brothers house a group of kids were going to fast, swerved to miss a dog, lost control of the vehicle when it hit a concrete power line pole, and two 15 year old kids died. I wrote about that in a blog the day after.
I would much rather write a blog about being thankful for all the good in your life today. The truth is you should be thankful for everything. Instead I’m awake at 4 AM with this on my mind making it impossible to sleep until I get this out of my head. Just slow down. I see cars everyday that weave from one lane to the next cutting people off, passing on the right, and just driving like an asshole only to take the next exit. If this is you – KNOCK it off. If you constantly gamble the lives of people in your car and the lives of people in cars around you it is only a matter of time that you will lose the bet.
Life is beautiful. It is a gift. It is fragile and NOT guaranteed. It could be over too soon, but gambling your life on the way to Walmart is simply stupid. I write about this with a heavy heart, but if one person thinks about this blog, takes my advice to slow down, and not drive like an idiot it will be worth it. Please share this message with people you care about. The families of all the people involved in the accidents yesterday should be having a great day cooking a turkey today. Instead they are in shock, heartbroken, and possibly planning a funeral. 45 eff’ing Seconds…….
FknBucky
READ * THINK * LIVE FREE
Please take a moment to thank the volunteer Firemen/Firewomen and the volunteer Ambulance folks. They see things no one should have to witness and give their time to take care of others.
Justice for Ryan Cooper. We will not stop asking questions until they are answered. I am 2,000 miles away, but I still keep an line of communication with friends in Traer. They are as passionate and pissed off today as they were the day this happened. You can’t hide forever and the truth will come out.
I am what I would consider well traveled. I have barely scratched the surface on how much I want to travel as I would love to never spend a day in the same place. I thrive in this situation. Multiple times in my life I’ve gone on road trips across the USA without a plan. I would drive until dark, find a hotel, and then crash for the night. In the morning I would go to breakfast and ask locals what was cool around there to go see. A kind conversation with a local will always yield some great advice on what to go see. This is what we would do. Spend the day checking out the natural beauty of this world in a town I’ve never heard of and will most likely never return to. Once done we would drive a few hours until dark and repeat the same process. Here is a HUGE sentence so pay attention: ”You are not that busy, life is not that crazy, and whatever you are stressed out about is not impossible.”
For unknown reasons humans tend to build these imaginary walls around them and then complain they can’t get out of the box. You built the walls. You only have to decide to knock them down. Once again I say to you ”It is that simple.” STOP wasting time and days on things that don’t matter. You don’t get it Bucky, my problems are way harder than everyone else’s. To that I say Bullshit!! I can’t pay rent, Bucky. So what is stressing out about it solving?? Nothing. Get a part time job. Cancel cable. Stop stressing and start doing. Okay I’m getting off topic here. Doesn’t make it mean less though. Print this paragraph and staple it to your forehead.
My point today is don’t waste precious time. We don’t know when this amazing journey called life is going to end. I live in an apartment building close to Uptown Charlotte. It is nice enough, rent is fair, and over the last 6 years I’ve had a good number of next door neighbors that I talk to when I see them. My current neighbor is Chris. The day he moved in I was stealing his power. I had a power chair that needed charging in the back of my van. Instead of dragging it out, I used an extension cord, and plugged it in to his patio outlet. In my defense that apartment had been empty over a month so…. I came outside to see my cord unplugged and thrown back over the wall towards my van. My first thought was okay somebody moved in. I knocked on his door and apologized for stealing power. We talked, he explained he didn’t know what to do so he just unplugged it, and then gave me permission to use it anytime I needed.
His name is Chris and he died a couple days ago. He jogged daily and had a beautiful white mutt that he would take with him. Always a kind word and we would chat for a couple moments when we ran into each other in the hallway. Chris was only 26 years old. He was running a marathon which was a hobby of his, and collapsed near the finish line dead. I’m told his mother and step-father were at the finish line of the marathon and witnessed him collapsing. There was absolutely nothing anyone could do. He was just gone in an instant without warning. I can’t think of a more unfair situation. It doesn’t matter how much money you have, how many cool toys you have, or how long your bucket list is because when your ticket is punched, that is the end.
Chris’s death has to be insanely hard on his family, but I hope you, me, and everyone can use this tragedy to remind ourselves to stop waiting for the right time to start living. You have to start today. Right now. No more excuses. Writing is my passion. I love doing it and hope one day I will be good enough to make a living doing it. If you want to help that dream come true please give me 5 stars, sign up to have my blogs emailed to you when I publish one, share it with other people you know, and make comments below.
I didn’t know Chris super well, but I guarantee you that I’ll never forget him. I will use his story to fuel my drive and my relentless pursuit to make my dreams come true. To come full circle and tie in the beginning of this blog with the end I will tell you this. Traveling as I have, talking to people like I do, and just enjoying new people I am bound to know more tragedy. Learning wisdom from other peoples lives is a tool for a more enjoyable life, but you have to be willing to accept the message. Chris died at 26 doing everything right. If his story doesn’t light a fire in you I have no idea what will. You have complete control in your life. Make decisions your 80 year old self will be happy about. No ones turns 80 and thinks ”Man I should have wasted more time stressing over dumb crap.”
I don’t have pictures of Chris so I added one of Annabel. RIP neighbor. A true tragedy.
Learn to enjoy your day instead of constantly bitching about the long line at Walmart, the President, your kids, the neighbor with a loud car, or whatever else gets your panties bunched up. Life is either awesome or sucks. You get to decide. Choose wisely.
Another week comes to an end. Summer 2021 has come to an end. In a week we will be in the last quarter of this year. How does time go by so fast?? I do quite a bit of reflecting on my life. I don’t mean looking back with regrets, but looking back to see how much progress I’ve made on my goals for life. I only have one question for you. If not now, then when??? When will you start your own business, when are going to travel to the place you dream of, when are you going to talk with the cute girl at the office?? If you start looking at life with ”when” instead of “what if” you will find it to be more rewarding.
What if is what dreamers ask. They secretly wish this and that happened or will happen with no real plan. Days, months, and years go by without any tangible progress towards the ”what if” you keep saying to yourself. What if I move? What if I go back to school? What if I talk to her? What if I go out on my own? While asking yourself these questions can be useful, it can also lead to negative thinking that always finds a way of coming true. In life you ALWAYS get what you think about. Read the book ”The Secret” if you haven’t already. If you have read it again. The issue of asking “what if” is the answers you give yourself. If I move, I won’t have friends there, if I go back to school and fail, if I talk to her she might not like me, and if I start my own business and don’t make it????
The negative answers always come and now you have already been unsuccessful without doing a darn thing. Seems like a bad plan to make your life awesome. Change your way of thinking by simply using a different word. When I move I’ll have the opportunity to start with a clean slate and the reality is your friends aren’t going anywhere. When I go back to school I’ll be on my way to building my self confidence, learn new skills, and be on way to making more money doing something I love. When I talk with her I may find out she has been waiting on my dumbass to say hello. When I start my own business I can finally start to do things my way and stop making others money.
I started my own business 2 years ago. COVID didn’t help, but there will always be challenges. If it wasn’t COVID there would be something else to overcome. Regardless of skin color, gender, rich, poor, sexuality, or any of the other labels media and politicians use to divide us there will be problems. If your parents did their job you will have no problems identifying them and solving them. You don’t understand Bucky. Some random guy called me a racist word in the grocery store parking lot. Perfect now you have an excuse to be angry and complain the world is against you. You give a lot of power to some ignorant moron you’ll never see again. I say ”Fuck that guy.” Not literally. Move on and forget it. Explain to me how arguing with idiots helps you reach your goals…
The beauty of being a ”when” thinker is you will subconsciously start to put a date on it. When I talk to that girl tomorrow I’ll know if she is interested or not, allowing me to stop wasting energy on the ”what if”. You might find out her Dad is the racist you ran into at the Piggly Wiggly which helps you decide if you want to raise little white power babies. Racism isn’t funny Bucky. Thanks for pointing out some obvious shit. Now move on and take this big sack of worthless anger with you. I hope one day you learn to just leave it and not fill that sack up in the first place. Lots of great people in this world, don’t waste time on crappy people, and learn to ask yourself “when” instead of “what if”.
Many times the things that I write are a reminder to me instead of a ”lesson” to you. I get caught up with the anger, the sadness, the fear of failure, and the worthless habit of blaming others for my problems. That last one will be another blog coming soon, but for today I really hope you use this blog as motivation to reflect on your own life to see what questions you’re asking.
I wrote this at 4 AM this morning, but just getting around to sharing it now. Not sure where this all came from, but it sounded good to me. I’m a when person and not a what if.
Army SPC Jeremiah Collins, says goodbye to his wife Angela (R) and daughters Skkye Collins (L) and Shyla Collins (2-R)
Yesterday I talked about respecting those that gave up everything for the idea of freedom. You can disagree with anything you want in America because you are free to do so. You don’t have to blindly agree with everything our government does, has done, or will do in the future. In fact it is your job as a citizen to question them, all of them, Donald Trump and Joe Biden, just because your “guy” or “gal” is in charge doesn’t mean they get a free pass to do whatever they want. I read a lot. I’ve read so many stories about incredibly brave men and women from all kinds of backgrounds that I know strength has nothing to do with race, gender, age, sexuality, or physical ability. I can’t do a push up, but I’m the strongest person you might ever meet. Or not.
To call me strong is easy. You see a wheelchair, think about how much it must suck, how sad or depressed you would be if it happened to you, and then label me as strong because I have a smile on my face. That isn’t strength, it is survival. I only have so many days left on Earth. It could be 1 more day or 10,000 more days, but I’m not going to waste them feeling sorry for myself about things I can’t change. Want to know real strength?? Go talk with the mother of 3 young children who’s husband is in harms way serving our country 6,494 miles from home. Yes I googled the distance from Charlotte, NC to Fallujah, Iraq. Keeping it real on FknBucky.
The families of our heroes need to be remembered on this Memorial Day as well. A friend of mine growing up lost her brother who was serving the USA when he was killed in a helicopter accident. I don’t know if she reads this blog or not, but I dedicate today’s blog to her brother and their family. His name is John Kaye and he was a hero. I bring it up to let her know a lot of people acknowledge the huge sacrifice he made to make sure the rest of us are safe and free. I didn’t know him well on a personal level, but I vow to never forget his name or sacrifice.
It is easy to forget the real reason for Memorial Day, but the families left behind to try and make sense of it all don’t have the luxury to forget. Commenting on a Meme in between beers 2 and 3 is not honoring those that gave their life in defense of our country. You don’t have to agree with the war, the military, or any of it, but you must understand these individuals believed in America enough to die for it. The sadness and the loss never really go away. It is impossible to understand the pain associated with loss like that unless you’ve been through it. We all hope you don’t experience that kind of grief.
Memorial Day is more than brats on a grill. More than having your first beer at 9 AM. It is important to take a few minutes, look around your life, and appreciate all that you have. Regardless of the hardships you have going on in your life, you are still here with the opportunity to change your life. The opportunity to read a book, start a business, have a family, or anything else you would like to do. Those that gave up their lives so we could be free don’t have the opportunity to do any of those things. Show your respect by living a full life. Chase your dreams. Hold those you love and tell them you love them often.
I’m very sorry that John Kaye lost his life serving our country. He was way too young and I know how much his sister and family loved him. He is missed by many and never forgotten. So remember him today, remember all of our fallen heroes, and don’t forget to honor the families that have lost their brother, son, Uncle, sister, daughter, or Aunt. Those labels came long before we called men like John a soldier, a Marine, a sailor, or any of the other terms used to describe service members.
I try to write about things that are meaningful and tell some jokes along the way. With a country so divided I hope that regardless of where you fall left or right you can take a moment to remember a hero that didn’t give his life to democrats or republicans. He gave his life for Americans. The least you can do is spend the day being just that. An American. An American that can see all the good we do together as a country. You have 364 other days to hate and trash the USA. Just for today drink your beers, eat the brats, and embrace the idea of freedom so many brave men and women died for.
A short blog this AM. The world is burning down all around us if you believe the panic peddlers. Thing is you can’t let that get to you. Same as the left vs right BS. It is not really a secret which way I tend to lean, but the reality is I believe the government is not the answer to every problem. We can disagree. It is okay with me if you want to be wrong. Ha. I’m old now. I used to be cool back in the day and to be honest I enjoyed it. I haven’t had a drink since New Years Eve 2020. That is almost a year and a half. It is longest I’ve gone since I was 13 I believe. Maybe even 8. I used to sip the foam off the old mans beers when I would get him one.
That is for me. In fact unless you are personally involved in my life you wouldn’t know anything about that. I quit for me and it isn’t anyone else’s business until now I suppose. I didn’t plan on sharing that 5 minutes ago, but feels right to do so. Maybe someone that reads this blog needs to know that it is okay. You can stop. I will write something up someday detailing all of this, but not today. If you or someone you know wants to talk about it with me please reach out. I will give anyone my time if they ask for it.
So gummies. You all know how much I enjoy having my nieces and nephews around. Kids in general. I just love hanging out with them and dropping little bits of wisdom on them from time to time. Funny I’ve wasted a lot of time in my life being wasted, but I never feel like time spent with kids could have been better spent some place else. Before my nephews came over a couple months ago I asked my sister what type of food or treats they enjoy so I could purchase them. You know that whole think of someone else thing I try to pound into your head. She simply said one word that changed my life. Gummies.
When I think of gummies the first thing that comes to mind is worms. Now when I was young our gummy worms doubled as fish lures. In fact I really think they might have been. We didn’t have a lot of money so lets just say I didn’t care for “gummies” all that much. Fast forward 30 years and holy smokes. The Gummy world has changed. Lifesavers makes Gummies!! Who knew?? The Trolli glow in the dark freaking sour gummy worms… Little piece of wormy heaven. What was the point of bringing up the no drinking FknBucky?? The sugar. I love sweets all of a sudden now that I don’t drink.
I had no idea. No one told me. There is a whole gummy section at the store! Everything is gummy. Only need Jack Link to come out with beef jerky flavored gummies. Think about it. Yeah that is gross. I’d probably buy them though. Yesterday I told you to eat all the ice cream and hate everyone like Chrissy Teigen. That woman is a bitch. I don’t find her attractive either. Not even kinda. No matter as now it is time to buy a bag of gummies and share with others.
Take the time to be kind to one another. We only have one life, one planet, and why spend it hating people you don’t know. Find common ground instead of drawing lines in the sand. It is easy to hate someone. It takes strength and character to love people we disagree with. Are you strong or weak?? Kind of a deep question for a blog about gummy worms huh??
I wrote this before I left for a hot yoga class this AM. Just got back from my first class since the world shut down and I feel AMAZING. Covid can suck it. I’m never stopping hot yoga again. I’ll blog about that tomorrow.
Find ways to love people you disagree with. That is true power.
Hello blog readers! It is Monday. Fresh start. We will get to an amazing dog story here, but first I’d like to take a moment to remember DMX. I actually met him while in LA a little over 10 years ago. I drove up to Hollywood to try out for last comic standing. I was kicked out because I can’t stand. That is not even kinda true, but in this believe everything world go ahead and run with that. Ha. It rained HARD the entire drive up from San Diego which is obviously not the norm for Southern CA. I was on the elevator and noticed a couple walking towards the elevator. I didn’t see who it was until he and his woman were in the elevator. I had just held the elevator for DMX. Mind you this was when he was very famous.
I talked about the stupid rain and a couple other brief things that had nothing to do with him being DMX. We got to their floor and off they went with me wishing them a good night. I thought it was a cool thing and was looking forward to telling my friends about it. The next morning I went down to the lobby and there was DMX with about 4-5 other people. He was trying to fly one of those cheap remote control helicopters that were popular at that time. I’m not into bothering people just to say I did so I let him be. To my surprise he actually came up to me and introduced himself as X.
He was just a cool guy. We talked for about 10 minutes while I waited for my car to come up. My car never came. Turns out it had a flat tire in the parking garage. That was a bummer. You know I forgot about the flat tire part of that trip. Oh well it happens. I pride myself on being able to read people when I meet them. I can usually tell if I’m going to like someone within a few moments. I’m not as good as women when it comes to this as they know within 4.87 seconds if they will sleep with a guy upon meeting him. That whole first impression thing. Anyway I found DMX to be genuine and I thought it was pretty cool for him to leave his people behind to come talk with me for a few minutes. I honestly don’t remember what we talked about mainly because it didn’t matter. We were just a couple of guys bullshitting about anything and everything.
He left in a hurry though when I asked to borrow money. Okay that didn’t happen. We are still in Dog Week so I gotta bring this full circle yet. I did some reading about X the last couple days and turns out he had a tough time growing up. His real father was nonexistent and his Moms taste in men was simply put “Crap”. These men she brought into their lives were not good men. Each one treating DMX worst than the one prior. Turns out he spent a lot of time in the streets of New York. When he was young the Yonkers part of NYC was not a nice place to be. For a teenager to be out in those streets night after night had to be extremely hard.
It is said that he would befriend stray dogs finding food in dumpsters to give the dogs. Their loyalty and friendship was never in question. He was right. A lot of people find salvation in animals. They don’t judge, they don’t worry about bad decisions in your past, and they just want to make you happy. It is so genuine that anyone that could hurt them in anyway has no heart and is most certainly evil. I don’t know if you can come back from that. Michael Vick was a flipping psycho and the things he was found to be guilty of made my stomach turn. I hope for his soul he really did change inside.
I didn’t “know” DMX. I did meet him and have a 10 minute conversation with the guy. I liked him, but I tend to like everyone until you give me a reason to not like you. I look for the good in others. Everyone I meet I just assume they are one friend away from being great. I could be that friend. Think about that. You could too. All you have to do is say hello. Remind people that they are not alone on this life journey. It means more to people than you know. Ever had a complete stranger improve your day. I have and I look for opportunities everyday to do that for others. Get ready to have your mind blown!
Dogs do that naturally. It is in their DNA. They will run up to a stranger and beg to be petted. Ever seen a sad person petting a dog?? Nope it is an instant smile machine. I have a feeling that is what teenage DMX found in these stray dogs. We came up a step from yesterday. You don’t have to sniff a butt to be dog like, you simply have to find a way to make a stranger smile. Be that one friend that gets them over the hump. You’ll surprise yourself at how great you can be even when you’re not getting credit for it.
Be kind to each other, be kind to animals, and find ways to make the world smile. That is the secret formula to a fulfilling life.
FknBucky
***Some articles talked about DMX being involved in Dog Fights. I truly hope this was not the case. I didn’t see anything that was actual proof and in America you are innocent until proven guilty.***
Wednesday. Hump Day. Those darn car insurance mafia people have ruined hump day for me as well. I always think about that camel walking thru the office. I will gladly lead the rebellion when it is time that we all stand together against this common enemy. White, black, yellow, green, smart, stupid, guy, girl, oak tree, slutty people, not slutty people, tall people, short people, kind, mean, in between, and pretty much ANYONE on Earth except for the gingers. I do not want those soul stealing psychos on my revolution team. Dang it. I’ll take them only to keep them off Team Car Insurance and we get to put them in Joe Biden’s children cages until combat day. Oh come on, it is just one little dig on ya…. Funny the fake outrage people aren’t clamoring for TV time now. Tell me again how they aren’t manipulating assholes. Don’t fall for it. Damn I totally forgot what my point was today. I started writing planning to get around to something, but I can’t for the life of me remember what the hell it was right now. I blame a Ginger. One of you got to me!! ***I make fun of Gingers because it is funny and they have no souls***. Just in case you wondered.
Oh yeah now I got it. I have one of my nephews staying with me this week. Many of you that follow this blog know how much I enjoy being an Uncle and I take that role seriously. Read the “Eat Your Beans” blog as it is always a good one. Young men need to be taught and guided on how to be a man. Looking people in the eye when you shake their hand, speak with a purpose, think thru your actions before you start doing anything, and most importantly you get respect when you give it. Be kind, pay attention, and never let people treat you poorly regardless of the circumstance. Make good choices and realize that sometimes the right choice is the one that benefits you personally the least. The ME ME ME attitude that is so prevalent in this world is a social cancer. People need to learn the more you do for others the better your life will be, but this takes time and the instant gratification crew have no patience for that.
Having good character is more important long term than the instant feel good now things that puts other peoples feelings and needs second to yours. To have a fulfilling life you have to build a solid foundation of doing right by others everyday regardless of what is in it for you. Class is not only in session on the weekends, evenings, or when it is convenient for you. Nope. It is 24/7. Every hour of every day is the time to show young people what it is to be a person of substance. You don’t teach by lecturing when it comes to these lessons, you teach by doing. You want the young people in your life to be good humans then actively pursue being good yourself. They will follow and are soaking up everything you do like a sponge. Make sure they are soaking up the right stuff because that’s all you put out.
School can only do so much and truthfully if you are leaving the character of the young people in your life to be molded by public school then you‘ve already failed. I talk with my nephews like they are men simply because one day God willing they will be. When they do something dumb I point it out. Not to be mean, but the complete opposite. I want them to learn and do better. There are a lot of dumbass people on this planet simply because no one loved them enough to call out their BS early on. Teenagers are supposed to be stupid. It is what they are. It is up to grown folks to remind them constantly with the goal of beating every little bit of self confidence out of them. Ha. Obviously not true. Don’t just point out the mistake, take a moment to explain why certain words or actions are not the right way, and then show (not tell) them the correct path. Show them how to be better and how great life is when you put others ahead of yourself.
Kids pick up on things so let them learn by experience. Let them see the difference of walking into a room and not saying a word to the other people in that room vs walking into said room, introducing themselves to each person, looking them in the eye and shaking hands. I’m not a parent, but I will say this, when I take my nephews with me while working I get so many compliments on them for the simple thing of them introducing themselves correctly. That in itself must mean they‘re doing something right. It is never to early to start these life lessons. Simply ask yourself this question “Do I love the young people in my life enough to show them how to become a person of character or is it too much work??”
It doesn’t matter what task you do with kids it only matters you spend time with them. I can teach the same message while throwing a football in the backyard as I can baking an apple pie. None of these things are rocket science. Finish what you start. Don’t do things half assed. Be proud of your work and when you do something do it the best you can. No one is going to make fun of a boy that baked a pie if that pie is stupid awesome tasting. They will make fun of you playing catch if you miss the ball and it hits you in the face. At least I would.
Enjoy your life, lead by example, and simply find ways to be kind to others.
FknBucky 