Posts Tagged ‘phone

26
Apr
24

My Friend named Grandma

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Just boarded another airplane for another flight home.  I’ve done this dozens actually hundreds of times before, but today is different.  I’m flying home to say goodbye to one of my dearest friends.  I’m so thankful for the time I was able to spend with her and will remember all the wonderful conversations we had over the last 20 years.  For those of you that know me personally you know I have friends all over the world and I’ve been blessed to have so many of them.  This friend was all alone in her category simply because of her name.  Grandma.

I have always been close to my Dads father.  I was named after him and that was a small club to be in.  I probably don’t deserve his name as he was one of the greatest men I’ve ever known.  When he was 80 yrs old I watched him carry a large metal tub filled with corn down to the hog barn to feed the chickens.  Ha.  Just kidding.  There are pigs in the hog barn you fools!! When I would visit my Grandparents, Grandpa and I would sit at the table having tea and thoseamazing chocolate chip cookies only Grandma could make, while G-ma waited on us.  Naturally most of the conversation was between us men.  It was just the way it was.  I mean we all know the golden rule.  Women have to be quiet while the men are talking.

My Grandpa passed away 17 years ago and while back visiting Grandma she mentioned she is awake until 2-3 am most nights.  I started volunteering at the children’s hospital in San Diego around this time.  Every Tuesday night I would open and run a playroom for the kids to get out of their rooms and have some fun.   My drive home was 30-40m min and almost always after 9 PM.  I like to talk to people when I’m driving, but 9 PM is a little late to call friends to just say “hey”. One night I thought Grandma is awake, I’ll call her.  I called, she was up, and we had a great talk.  As time went on, week after week, I would continue to call G-ma on my drive home. She looked forward to it and so did I.  Something happened during those calls.  My Grandma became my friend.

She told me so many stories. How she first knew my Grandfather was the man she would marry.  He was at her place to help do some sort of work and as he left the house with the others, my grandma handed him a pair of gloves and their hands touched.  Not a quick touch, but long enough to gaze into each others eyes and decide I’m going to marry this person.  Simpler times.  A hand lingering just long enough to relay the message, but not too long to be creepy. 

She told me about her wedding day.  They were going to “honeymoon” in Waterloo planning to eat a fine dinner and then going to see a movie.  For reasons not discussed the young married couple were running late and had to smash a couple burgers quickly so they could still make the movie on time.  The best part was the happiness in her voice as she relived these memories with me.  I felt and still feel honored she shared these stories with me.  I’m grateful to have had the opportunity to know her so well. 

Grandma had so many pictures and was a rock within the family.  Doing all she could to keep the family together having family reunions and always encouraging everyone to let go of the anger, be open to kindness, and forgive when necessary.  It seems fitting that our whole family will be brought together one more time by Anna Pearl.  I can envision her and Grandpa (together again!) looking down at us all with smiles knowing they did their best for their family and I’m not alone when I say THANK YOU to both of them. 

Just part of Grandmas super army. Love you forever Grandma.

I will say this.  MAKE the time to talk with people you love.  None of us are that busy we can’t put forth the effort.  Well so and so never calls me, why should I reach out to them???  Why shouldn’t you??  Whatever happened let it go.  It isn’t worth dragging that anger anchor around with you.  Don’t you want to be free of this pissed off attitude that sucks up all your energy so you can stay mad???

I loved my Grandmother without question.  She was a remarkable woman.  All that came natural.  I’m happiest though knowing I took the time to make my amazing G-ma my best friend while I had the opportunity.  She taught me so many lessons that I will use the rest of my life.  Many times people will say I didn’t know what I had until it was gone.  I have learned very hard lessons that way, but this one time I got ahead of the game.  I made sure to appreciate my friend everyday. 

The world lost a bright shining light of a human, but heaven gained an angel that will forever be looking down at our families. 

That is what I wrote on the flight out.  I’m currently on the flight back to Charlotte. At the visitation I went by, but purposely didn’t look into the casket directly.  I used a bit of side eye, then closed my eyes, and said a private prayer between Anna Pearl and myself.  I didn’t want the vision of her in my head overwhelming all the happy mental pics I’ve taken of her during my life. 

My family is far from perfect.  My Grandma wasn’t perfect.  I am so far from Perphekt that I have to spell it wrong.  I might name one of my kids that actually….  Truth is like all families there is some drama and blah blah.  I don’t involve myself in that.  Some people need conflict and thrive on it.  I’m not one of those.  I prefer if something has your panties all wadded up, say something, get it off your chest, and then move on. 

The celebration of life was awesome.  Many of my family members made the trip home and we got to visit, laugh, and enjoy the moment.  Anna Pearl got us all together one last time.

We are all going to miss her, but I’ve promised myself to replay the great times in my head and share the advice, family history, and the wisdom my dear friend Grandma passed to me.

I love you Grandma and Grandpa.  So happy you are together again.  I promise to do my best to encourage everyone to drop the anchors and be happy again.  At this stage of the game no body is changing.  Just accept your family members for who they are and simply love them unconditionally.

Thank you,

FknBucky

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26
Nov
22

Can you be trusted??

Saturday. I was up at 3:30 again last night. Not sure what that is all about, but I didn’t write. I watched “Kings of Pain” on one of my apps where they get stung by a centipede from Asian forest. That might be the grossest thing I’ve ever seen.

I can “man up” when needed to kill a spider, creepy, gross, and crawly thing, but deep down I hate them. Many a time in my life I’ve had to grab a spider with my bare hand and without a doubt every single time I was secretly wishing someone else would do it. In Cali when Alex lived with me, she screamed “spider”, and pointed at her bed when I rolled in there. Sure enough a big black jerk face spider was hauling butt across her blanket. There was no time to ponder what to do. If I lost sight of it there was a good chance I’d never find it and no one wants to sleep in spider bed. I just reached out, grabbed it, and killed it instantly by smushing it in my hand. I was a hero. I went into my room, did the “Willies” shake, and thought about how much that sucked.

Go back and read “EAT YOUR BEANS” part 1 and 2. Then make your sons read it. Everyday.

I had a message I wanted to get into on this blog, but not sure I want to just yet. Life has been difficult as usual lately. The ever easy days that I had in my twenties aren’t around anymore. Waking up next to a beautiful woman on a Saturday morning, who I would offer a ride home if she remembered my name, but didn’t reveal the fact that I didn’t own a car. The ride home was the Summit Stage. Man I was awesome. Dimples are amazing. I would just smile as I explained how to walk to the bus stop and Friday night hook-up would laugh at my cuteness…. I’d have a quick puff puff, head to the hill, and snowboard all day with my friends that would most definitely be there. We didn’t have cell phones, didn’t bother making plans, and just knew where my crew would be at. Great days.

I just thought about being 19 in Iowa. I had a great friend (still a great friend) that I hung out with every day. Back in those days we always had a cooler in the trunk filled with ice cold Busch Light. I don’t recommend drinking and driving so be sure to chug as much as you can while stopped at a stoplight or stop sign. Safety first. Can you imagine the agony of hitting a pothole and spilling your beverage. Take no chances my friends. Obviously I’m kidding. There are no stoplights on gravel roads. Shoot, got distracted there, okay now back on message. This friend and I would pick one another up daily. I would grab a drink from the cooler, always grabbed an extra one for my brother, put it in a coozie, and then set it under the passenger seat. When he got in the car without question he would reach under the seat and grab his can of thirst quenching super nectar. It was always there. When is the last time you had 1,000% faith a fellow human would have your back???

I haven’t thought about that in a long time. Pretty cool though. Okay, now it is time for me to explain how my story will give you something positive to think about today. Life is not about accumulating possessions. Many people don’t understand that. They just want “more” all the time. More money, more cars, more houses, more more more. Then they can show it off to you in an attempt to prove to you how important and great they are. I saw a interview with the artist PitBull talking about his 17 super cars. I’m not impressed. Just because you are financially successful in life does not automatically mean you are a successful human. You might have to read that sentence a couple times.

A successful life in my opinion is measured by relationships. Not Friday night hook-ups, but the true relationships you cultivate throughout your time on Earth. How many people completely trust you to follow thru every single time?? You can’t buy trust. You can’t borrow it. You can’t beg for it. You have to earn it EVERY single day. It isn’t a “when I’m in the mood” thing or “I’ll do it next week” kind of thing. Can you be trusted to kill the spider?? Can you be trusted to remember your friend when grabbing yourself a cold drink from the trunk?? Those are little silly things Bucky.

You are 100% correct. They are little seemingly trivial things, but how can I trust you with big things when you haven’t put the time in gaining my trust doing the little things. Yeah that is big deal. Spend your time on Planet Earth (a very short time in the big picture) acquiring trust not stuff. A new car is not as important as a friend KNOWING without fail you will show up in that new car to give them a ride to the airport at 4:30 AM.

This blog is so far away from what I planned to write. Not a problem as I simply type what my brain is saying. Be a person of value and not just a person that has valuable stuff.

Love Who You Are Today, Tomorrow is not Guaranteed.

FknBucky

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11
Nov
21

Going to make a Phone Call

Justice for Ryan Cooper. I think about it every single day. I don’t understand with all the tools law enforcement has why don’t we have someone in custody for this horrible crime. You are missed and loved Ryan. Busch Light Brotherhood (includes the ladies) will never forget you and never stop looking for who is responsible.

It is Veterans Day. What does that mean to you?? Do you think about it?? I’m willing a bunch of people don’t give it a thought. Not those that read my blog because you are patriots and I appreciate every one of you. Keep reading, keep helping others EVERY DAY, and most of all keep making yourself better. Listen to Jim Rohn. I’ve sent his seminar to over 20 people to help them thru hard times.

We are free in this country. I do believe that is an enormous responsibility to not piss it away. In name of ”good” there are individuals willing to trade a little freedom for the easy road. Not me. I will overcome any obstacle and have proven that to myself more times than I can count. You can walk up to a military person and say ”Thank you for your service” and feel good about yourself the rest of the day. Words are crap. Lots of people say lots of things. You want to honor the men and women of the military?? Use your freedom for more than standing on a street corner holding a sign that says ”Poor Me, Life is hard”.

I believe the book ”Lone Survivor” should be mandatory reading for all high school kids. It is the only book I had to put down because I was crying to hard to read. I still remember the moment. I was living at La Jolla Palms in San Diego area, I bawled like hungry baby as I read those words, and relived the battle with author Marcus Luttrell. The bravery and sacrifice these warriors make without question is impossible to repay. Want to thank a Veteran?? Pick up a book. Read about the things these men and women go thru on the battlefield. Work at becoming a better human every single day of your life. You are free to educate yourself in this awesome country.

The four frogmen that went out to find a really bad guy, but 3 goat herders came up on top of them blowing their cover. They were faced with an impossible situation. Kill the herders so they would not be able to alert the massive amount of Taliban fighters very close by. They knew if they killed these unarmed goat herders they would most likely face a court martial. Simply tying them up could cause them to die and then a herd of goats would just be wandering around. The last choice of let them go and get ready for a very bad fight. This is what they did and the bravery is off the charts.

The Taliban fighters came at them fast and relentlessly. A chance to kill some elite American Seals would be very useful in the propaganda machine they used to control the mountain people. I believe the average education there is about 3rd grade level. Intelligent people are harder to control and manipulate. Hmmm if only someone had said the best way to honor the sacrifice made by military people is to educate yourself…. For the record reading the shampoo bottle while you poop does not count. It did not take long for the Seals to get pinned down by the Taliban and stuck without an exit plan. They were in trouble, but had no phone signal from their positions. Insert Lieutenant Michael Murphy.

Mike Murphy is a legend and always will be. He was incredibly respected by his Seal peers and by everyone that knew him. As the ”leader” of the four seals it was on him to get help on the way. He looked at his friends and said I’m going to make a phone call. He left the safety of their cover to get a phone signal. I’ve done this a hundred times, but never with a few hundred enemy fighters surrounding me and constantly shooting AK-47’s at me. He knew what was going to happen and did it anyway. Out in the open he called back to base and told them they were in big trouble and going to die without help. Mike Murphy died making that phone call. On a mountain in Afghanistan fighting for who knows what with rules and regulations that cost lives of wonderful people.

War is horrible. The reality is freaking horrible. Bad things happen. That is why it is called war and not fun. There is a lot more to this story, but I’m going to stop here. If you haven’t read the book make time to do that. It is an important story to know and we as a country owe it to those young men to actually remember. Never forget is a crap meme people put on their Facebook page on Sept 10-12. Don’t be one of those people. Read, educate yourself, and make a positive difference in your community. Pick up trash, play checkers with old people, make sandwiches for homeless people, or anything you think of that will simply make your environment a little better.

We get so caught up in this holiday and that holiday. They are just days like the other 364. Take time every day to make a positive difference. I truly believe the greatest way to honor our Veterans is to have pride in our communities, to educate ourselves and our children about why freedom is so precious, and simply be proud to say ”Fuck yeah! I’m American!!”

FknBucky

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16
Apr
21

Take a Moment

I wrote most of this a couple days ago, but needed to think for a day or two before posting. Sometimes before you shoot your mouth off or your FB post off take a step back and think about the consequences your words might have.

Others. Funny word that means something or nothing depending on how you think about it. Who are the others?? Family members?? Friends? Co-Workers?? Maybe random people you happen to be on a city bus with. Or on an elevator. Unless you are the freaking Una-Bomber you are going to have other people around you a large part of your life. Do you think about them or keep your focus on yourself??? I try very hard to think about others in my life, but I come up short. Meaning I screw up and I’m completely oblivious to it until I’m called out. The moment I realize my wrong I usually sit back and think how in the heck did I let that happen???

It happened today, just now actually and I feel pretty crappy about it. I don’t need to get into the details as that doesn’t matter so much as the point or lesson. No matter how diligent we try to be about this and that sometimes we just screw up. It is human to do so. Letting down someone you care about is a complete crap feeling that I dislike a lot. This is why I try hard to not let it happen. When it does though don’t make excuses. Own your mistake and save the words for a blog. They only way to right the wrong is actions. Stay with me right here and read slow because this point is going to be important for the rest of your life.

Words, English, or Spanish are languages that you and others use to communicate. The words on their own don’t mean crap though. Words are easy. You can be a complete ass, simply say “I’m Sorry” when you get caught, and go about your life exactly the same. Apologies are for real remorse and I don’t respect people that throw them around. Here we go. I promised you a mind blowing moment and we are finally there. The only language that matters in life is “actions”. Your actions, the things you actually do, and the way you react to your mistake is an actual language and the only one I read. I simply don’t care what BS comes out your mouth as the only apology I need or care about is the one you make with your behavior. Be better when you make mistakes and save the “I’m sorry” for when you bump into someone in the check out line at Target.

I had to make that point. Now for our dog related post.

I had a long drive home today from the mountains. I’ve made this same drive a dozen times over the last few years so I know the route, but I still have Google Maps going to make sure I know the route and warn me of traffic problems. Today I was cruising along and the freeway split. I thought I’m supposed to go left, but the google map had me staying to the right. I trusted the app. Well the app was frozen and not doing a dang thing for me. I thought well I’ll just turn here and run back into the freeway. I had forgotten that driving in the mountains is no guarantee you will run into anything except more curvy roads to drive on. I am cursing my google map app at this point.

I tried the other map app on my phone and got zero result on that also. Now I’m just driving around some mountain town with no idea how to get back to stupid road I needed. I was getting more angry every second that went by. I finally pulled over, restarted my phone, and got a map app to come on. Of course I had Annabel with me and she was looking at me like “you’re an idiot”. I took a second to restart myself and realized she was very right. I had pulled over in a “park” type area in the middle of the mountains. It was 76 degrees outside and sunny. Here I am losing my mind cursing the road, the sun, Joe Biden, Laura Trump, Mr. T, the stop sign, stupid green car in front of me, the crap white car behind me, and well you get it. I curse a lot. I took a breath and stopped cursing.

I got out of the van with Annabel and rolled about 50 feet to a nice shady spot that had a tiny creek running thru it. It was actually pretty cool little spot. I started to throw the frisbee and all that anger started to leave me one throw at a time. It was almost like I could see the anger flying off the frisbee as it spun thru the air. Turns out that was slobber leaving the frisbee, but lets say it was the anger to make this life moment sound better. I had to honestly ask myself where was I in such a hurry to get to??

I took 45 minutes to get back on track, but I had a calm me and a very exercised puppy happily sleeping in the seat next to me. It was a beautiful day and now I’m home writing at 8 pm having accomplished all I needed to with time to spare. Someday I’ll learn to not let myself get all worked up in the first place, but until then I’ll have to keep a dog close to tell me I’m an idiot. I know this is dog week, but in my opinion playing frisbee with Annie to not be pissed at the world anymore is a great dog story. Plus it is my blog so I make the rules.

I’m trying to tie in the first part with the last part, but truth is I just feel bad I let a friend down and writing about things is how I process them. I guess you can look at both situations and realize neither would have happened if I had been more patient, paid better attention to details, and actually do what I talk/write about.

Have a great Friday. I appreciate you all very much.

FknBucky




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