Posts Tagged ‘safe

03
Jan
23

Perfectly Imperfect

Brand new year. Clean slate. What will you do differently this year??? Maybe 2023 is the year you actually stick to your resolutions. I have some big goals for this year and I’m very excited to chase them. My days are not unlimited and if I want to leave a positive mark on the world, I can’t be screwing around. I’m proud of the time I spend with young people and the lessons I’m able to teach them along the way. My niece is my latest victim, but she gives the right answer when I ask her how much “whiny voice” helped her get something done. She instantly replies “zero”. I’m old now. Not sure how 44 got here so fast. Not sure how 20+ years after that motorcycle accident got here, but here I am. I accepted my fate a long time ago while having a conversation with a mirror in Craig Hospital. It was just me and my reflection having the most powerful conversation of my life that no one else will ever understand.

Life is about accepting things that are so that you can be prepared to change the future. Read that one again. With all the wisdom I have acquired in my life, I still get reminded of that on a daily basis. I’m a student. Always. I want to learn everything, but there isn’t enough time. I wish I knew 20 languages. A hundred of them. I don’t. I barely speak English, I need to fix that, but I’m lazy in that department. Anyway lets not get bogged down there. If the opportunity is there, take the time to learn another language. I find teachers everywhere in life mostly because I’m willing to listen. I’m a great talker. One of the best in my opinion. I think before I speak and carefully use the words and phrases that will benefit me as the conversation goes forward. Sometimes I know what people will say because I led them there the whole time. I’m a conversation magician. That is enough insider info for you today.

What happens when I’m talking with a person that is 8 yrs old?? Complete chaos. I can’t predict what they will say. They haven’t been fully trained yet to fear change and still have the ability to say what they are thinking without fear of being canceled. I find it incredibly refreshing. Hmmm typing this out makes sense to me, and this is probably why I enjoy talking with kids. I can’t manipulate them or control the words they will say because they are still a true clean slate. Adults are like a chalkboard. You grab an eraser and move it back and forth until the original message is unreadable, but the chalk still remains. It never fully goes away meaning no matter how hard you try the past is always seeping into your present effecting the decisions you make concerning your future. Freedom is understanding that and overcoming it. To be free of your past mistakes takes work, but it is worth the trouble. Accept it. Learn the wisdom. Let it go.

I can’t stand half ass. To me don’t even start if you aren’t giving 110%. Perfection is what I strive for every time. That is why many blogs never get published. My name is on them. No chance I’m putting crap out there. My physical challenges are many these days. A few times a year I spend a Saturday with college kids learning to be Occupational Therapists. I do this because a friend of mine who I respect greatly asked me and I’m a sucker for having a conversation with 21 ladies & the token 1 guy about my favorite subject. ME. They work on me diagnosing the obvious things and a few I make up along the way. I have issues with my elbows and shoulders which sucks, but while going thru this process I was asked a question. Does your work suffer because it takes longer??? I was kind of offended by it and replied a very hard “NO”. I looked her in the eye and said “I don’t care how long it takes, I’m not “half assing” anything ever. Instant respect from the whole table. They knew I meant that. Tackle every task in your life with that philosophy and watch your life improve overnight.

Back to my teacher. I watched her learn to ride a hoverboard after getting one for Christmas. She got a little braver and more confident as time went on until BAM!!! Niece down. Insert tears. Fear. Anger. I yelled instantly “Get back on it”. I heard “No”, but that was an unacceptable answer. She did get back on and two minutes later the fall was history, but the lesson it taught was the present allowing her to not make that same mistake again. Accept it happened, but only hold on to the wisdom, let the fear and anger go. I’m a hard-ass yelling get back on it, but inside I’m an old softie. We went to the store and bought wrist, elbow, knee pads, and a helmet the next morning along with some paint and sand paper. We had to customize the pads to be cool otherwise they suck. Best way to make something cool to a kid, let them create it. Mind blown, I know.

She told me what she wanted and I traced it out with a sharpie so she could paint it. She sucks at painting. Got more paint on me than the pad. I showed her how to only dip the tip of the brush in paint and then slowly trace the lines I made to make it look great. I asked if she understood, she said “yes”, and then I handed her the paint brush. She immediately dipped that sucker into paint up to her elbow and in record time of 2 seconds completely traced my lines in the worst way possible. My inside voice was screaming “WTF!!!” I looked at her and saw a face of pride. She loved it and was all smiles. She had sanded this knee pad down, picked out the design, and then did it. I had to remind myself she is 8, this isn’t the Mona Lisa, and most importantly it made her happy. It was so imperfect that it became perfect. JUST LIKE THE PERSON YOU ARE.

I decided to dip my brush into paint up to my elbow and join the fun. It was freedom to paint outside of the lines and LOVE the way it looked. I had just learned a massive life lesson from an eight year old girl that sucks at painting.

Happy New Year!

I can’t stress enough how much I appreciate everyone that reads these blogs and truly hope that some of my rantings will help ignite a fire in you to chase your dreams. I don’t want to arrive alone at the finish line, I want to bring everyone I interact with with me. Use your clean slate to accept that you’re Perfectly Imperfect.

Please share the blog. Maybe you didn’t need this message today, but a family member might. A co-worker struggling with their confidence might read this and begin thinking I can do it. Instead of posting a “I hate Trump or I hate Biden” meme today, share a positive message that just might change a life.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

23
Oct
21

Movie Set Sadness

Hello Saturday. I started my day volunteering with the college to help future OT’s learn to diagnosis future patients. A fun thing to do and very informal environment. Lots of things going on in the world today, but I’ll save those for another blog day. I feel obligated to talk about this ”accidental” shooting on the movie set with Alec Baldwin. Most of my friends and certainly my family understand firearms because our parents made sure of it. Best way to be hurt by a firearm is to have ZERO knowledge of them. You may not drive a car, but you know to wear your seat belt, look both ways before crossing a street, and respect cars because to not means you will be killed by one. Cars aren’t guns Bucky. Thanks for pointing out some obvious crap.

First rule in firearms. If it isn’t your gun, DO NOT TOUCH IT. Ever. Leave it be. A gun sitting on a table can’t kill or hurt you if no one touches it. Easier said than done you say?? Not really. I was raised with guns everywhere. I never played with a gun. I understood at a very young age that they weren’t toys, they were tools built for a job. No further explanation needed. If you know something can kill you, a sane person doesn’t play with it. Kind of like deciding to take your pet cobra on a walk. Yeah stupid.

Second Rule in Firearms. Anytime someone hands you a gun regardless of who it is, always assume it is loaded. ALWAYS. I don’t care if the Pope himself hands you a pistol and says “its okay, it is unloaded”, you still treat it like it will fire and blow your big ugly head off. I am assuming your head is big and ugly for this message. Now you are holding a gun that you believe is loaded, so what to do now. Simple. Check it so you can know for yourself that it is not loaded. If you are not 100% certain how to do this ASK. Put the gun down and say how do I unload or check it?? If anyone laughs at you, get up and leave. You don’t want to be around stupid people and guns. I love to talk smack as everyone knows. There is no time for that when handling firearms. Zero exceptions.

Third Rule in Firearms. NEVER point a gun at anything you are not ready to shoot. Ever. I don’t care if it is unloaded, safety on, or any other dumb thing you want to say right now. It is never okay to point a weapon at someone or something you aren’t willing to shoot. The second a firearm is in your hand, you are responsible for everything that happens with it. If you follow the above rules you will never have an accident and no one around you will be hurt or killed because of a firearm in your hand. As mentioned I have been around guns my entire life. Pistols, shotguns, rifles, and grenade launchers. We only use the grenade launchers when hunting rabbits because it is funny to watch them blow up into little rabbit pieces. Suck it hippie. No time for your BS today.

Shooting guns is fun, but only when done safely. There are no second chances. No saying ”my bad”. Mistakes with firearms simply can’t happen. If you choose to not have firearms in your home that is your decision and in this country you are free to make it, but that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook for making sure your kids know the above rules. At some point in their life they will be in the presence of a weapon. Knowing the rules above will save their life or someone near them. Not your gun, do not touch it. If someone points that gun at anything unsafe you simply leave. More people are killed by stupid people than anything else on this planet. If you are in a group of people and you can’t tell who the dumb one is, then unfortunately for you, it is you.

I wasn’t there on set when Alec did this. I can say if he had followed the above rules one person would still be alive and another would not be hurt. I have done a lot of dumb things in my life, but none of them were with guns. I don’t drink and then shoot guns. Never. Now dropping a lot of acid and shooting a fully automatic AR-15 at baby deer in the summer time is the greatest fun a man can have. Ease up PETA person, I ate a vegan chicken nugget today so I’m like at peace with Earth and stuff. Okay I guess we managed to put a couple jokes in here.

This is crazy unsafe. Everyone knows babies should only shoot revolvers.

I don’t care about politics when it comes to situations like this. No one else should either. Tragically a woman lost her life. That should have never happened. I hope no one else ever gets hurt or killed by a firearm, but I can promise you ignorance is not bliss. They are not going away anytime soon or ever if I have my say. You have a responsibility to make sure your children and loved ones are protected from themselves. Guns are not toys. They are not ”cool” like in a music video. They are tools used by responsible men, women, and some kids under proper supervision. I think there will be some changes on how people use firearms on movie sets and what not.

Be part of solutions.

FknBucky

READ * THINK * LIVE FREE

02
Aug
21

“I’m Lovin You”

This isn’t how I envisioned my next blog to go. I haven’t published anything since writing about Ryan. Not that I haven’t had things to say, it just felt so trivial once I started putting it into words. We lose the purpose of existence in a moment. 9/11 – We are one!!! A few years later it is a Facebook post that catches your eye so you share it saying never forget as you grab another Truly from the cooler. I’m not saying it is right or wrong. It simply is what happens. The best way to honor the people we love that left us to soon is to cherish the moments we have with the people still here. That is the purpose.

I drove to Alabama today. I meant to drive over 2 days ago, but kept getting caught up with this and that. I believe looking back now I was looking for things to delay my trip because I knew when I got here things would become real for me. It has been real for my family here in Lower Alabama or LA for the locals. We lost Momma last week. She was everyone’s Momma. The first time little brother introduced her to me he called her Momma and said I should as well. That was that. She embraced the stereotype and simply was everything people say about Southern hospitality. There are never guests in Mommas house. Once you cross that threshold you are family. Grab a plate, load it up, and find a safe place to sit down.

Chances are you will be run over by a dog or kid at some point while eating. Some people have beautiful houses filled with expensive neat stuff. It can be impressive, but not for me. I want to be in a home. A dwelling that is filled with love, amazing smells of pound cake baking, and hopefully a muddy dog chasing a 7 year kid down the hall. I feel sorry for people that don’t get to know what that type of love is like. It simply didn’t matter who you are outside of these walls because while you are inside of them you always had food to eat, a family right here, with a large helping of love for dessert. Okay that is not true because dessert is a ginormous bowl of ice cream that Dakota has to scoop or it doesn’t taste as good.

I stayed here in Alabama with little brother and his family for a long while after I left Cali. I decided I was going to lose some weight and started eating salads for meals. Not an easy thing to do with Momma making fried chicken, fried pork chops, potato salad (MAN I LOVE THIS), pound cake, and pretty much everything. Collard greens with bacon, jalapeños with bacon, hell I think some mornings we had bacon wrapped bacon dipped in melted butter. I would eat my salad only to have Momma hand me a plate with bacon wrapped bacon on it saying it ain’t right just eating a salad. Who am I to argue??? I can lose weight next week.

I pulled into the driveway tonight about 8:30 PM. I was supposed to leave on Friday, then Saturday, then Sunday morning, but it was almost 1 PM by the time I was leaving Charlotte. In my defense I do have a job and had to handle a few things before being gone this week. Pulling in I noticed the lawn was littered with cars. Sunday dinner. Every week there is a big meal and everyone eats. I smiled and thought this is what Momma left us. She didn’t leave us stuff, money in a mattress (although I’m checking first thing in the AM), or some big inheritance. Nope, she left us each other to lean on, laugh with, and share the pain with in hard times. We don’t have to face anything alone because we have this beautiful family Momma gave us. She was wise many times teaching lessons without pointing out the incredibly obvious.

We won’t need a crafty Meme to remember Momma. It won’t come around once a year to throw up a never forget picture of Momma. Nope. Every get together, impromptu Wednesday night we decide fuck it and have a few more that a couple while building a fire, and the Sunday evenings sharing food, laughs, and love with the people that are important to us. The truth is she never left. Her physical body stopped holding her back and now she can watch over us all. Momma didn’t go to bed without telling everyone she loved them. You didn’t walk out her front door without her saying she loved you. She understood how precious moments are and without shoving it down our throats she simply taught us by doing it. I’ve pondered what to write for a week now. I really didn’t have it until I pulled into the driveway tonight. I was met with 20 voices telling I was late, fat (thanks Shannon), ugly, and most importantly a tiny voice asking where did I want all my precious pictures a certain young lady drew for me. One of them is scary she said so I have to be careful when I look thru them.

It doesn’t seem fair that she is gone. I know it is incredibly hard on my sister in law. I can’t imagine the pain she is in and I never like to think about the day when well you know. We will keep Momma right here with us everyday. Every time someone leaves we say “Love you!” Every time we hand an idiot eating a salad a plate full of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and collard greens with bacon there will be Momma looking down on us proud that she left a legacy of love, respect, and a few extra lbs….. She also is one of one that passed every level of Candy Crush and became a God to the game.

We all love you and miss you Momma. We cherish the wisdom and kindness you showed us.

Always tell those you care about that you love them. Don’t wait for a perfect moment or time. Just do it every time. I can still hear the words.

“Alright, I’m loving you.” Then Momma walked up the stairs. This time Momma had a few extra stairs to climb to be with her maker.

“Goodnight, We all love you too Momma.”

FknBucky




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